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Author: Diana Stefano
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781727605174
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 150
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Book Description
My Kid Is an Asshole, and So Is My Dog-- a comedic look at the drama of raising a teenage girl I just returned from the mall after school shopping with my soon-to-be sophomore and her friend. I now understand why fathers opt to go camping, roll around in elk urine, and shit in a hole rather than go to the mall three days before school starts. As if the crowds weren't bad enough, my girl decided to wear a flannel that hung lower than her shorts, making it appear that she was walking around naked from the waist down. She was flocked by sales people, who, I am sure, were calculating their commissions in their heads. I mean, why not? Everybody wants to help the girl who arrives pant-less. Obviously, she needs clothes.We're not home half an hour and the vodka I poured for myself is only half gone when she yells down from her room, "Mom, have you seen my push up bra? Maybe we need to go back to the mall."It's the moments like these where I'm convinced raising a teen is bullshit, and I wonder if we'll ever come out on the other side even speaking to one another. Pass the vodka.There aren't enough warnings in the world for raising teenage girls. Although my mom swears my daughter takes after me, so it's karma.Is it karma that I've got two barking dogs? It must be. Have you ever heard a shiu-tzu bark? I have. Over and over. They think they're coyotes. I swear. And right now, they're wrestling over some stuffed animal, which is surely about to fling open, so I can pick up little beads all over the carpet while drinking my vodka. No wait. They stopped. One of them had to drag its ass across the floor. Epic.It's in the little moments where I earn my parenting badges-the faded stretch marks.Ruff, ruff!If this is my karma for being such an asshole to my mom, maybe we can get through this too. And if she pays attention in English, instead of scouting for a prom date, she can learn to write her own book-the sequel to this: My Mom Is an Asshole, but Not My Dog.
Author: Diana Stefano
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781727605174
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 150
Get Book Here
Book Description
My Kid Is an Asshole, and So Is My Dog-- a comedic look at the drama of raising a teenage girl I just returned from the mall after school shopping with my soon-to-be sophomore and her friend. I now understand why fathers opt to go camping, roll around in elk urine, and shit in a hole rather than go to the mall three days before school starts. As if the crowds weren't bad enough, my girl decided to wear a flannel that hung lower than her shorts, making it appear that she was walking around naked from the waist down. She was flocked by sales people, who, I am sure, were calculating their commissions in their heads. I mean, why not? Everybody wants to help the girl who arrives pant-less. Obviously, she needs clothes.We're not home half an hour and the vodka I poured for myself is only half gone when she yells down from her room, "Mom, have you seen my push up bra? Maybe we need to go back to the mall."It's the moments like these where I'm convinced raising a teen is bullshit, and I wonder if we'll ever come out on the other side even speaking to one another. Pass the vodka.There aren't enough warnings in the world for raising teenage girls. Although my mom swears my daughter takes after me, so it's karma.Is it karma that I've got two barking dogs? It must be. Have you ever heard a shiu-tzu bark? I have. Over and over. They think they're coyotes. I swear. And right now, they're wrestling over some stuffed animal, which is surely about to fling open, so I can pick up little beads all over the carpet while drinking my vodka. No wait. They stopped. One of them had to drag its ass across the floor. Epic.It's in the little moments where I earn my parenting badges-the faded stretch marks.Ruff, ruff!If this is my karma for being such an asshole to my mom, maybe we can get through this too. And if she pays attention in English, instead of scouting for a prom date, she can learn to write her own book-the sequel to this: My Mom Is an Asshole, but Not My Dog.
Author: Robert I. Sutton
Publisher: Business Plus
ISBN: 0759518017
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 166
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Book Description
The definitive guide to working with -- and surviving -- bullies, creeps, jerks, tyrants, tormentors, despots, backstabbers, egomaniacs, and all the other assholes who do their best to destroy you at work. "What an asshole!" How many times have you said that about someone at work? You're not alone! In this groundbreaking book, Stanford University professor Robert I. Sutton builds on his acclaimed Harvard Business Review article to show you the best ways to deal with assholes...and why they can be so destructive to your company. Practical, compassionate, and in places downright funny, this guide offers: Strategies on how to pinpoint and eliminate negative influences for good Illuminating case histories from major organizations A self-diagnostic test and a program to identify and keep your own "inner jerk" from coming out The No Asshole Rule is a New York Times, Wall Street Journal, USA Today and Business Week bestseller.
Author: Aaron James
Publisher: Anchor
ISBN: 0385535686
Category : Philosophy
Languages : en
Pages : 188
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Book Description
In the spirit of the mega-selling On Bullshit, philosopher Aaron James presents a theory of the asshole that is both intellectually provocative and existentially necessary. What does it mean for someone to be an asshole? The answer is not obvious, despite the fact that we are often personally stuck dealing with people for whom there is no better name. Try as we might to avoid them, assholes are found everywhere—at work, at home, on the road, and in the public sphere. Encountering one causes great difficulty and personal strain, especially because we often cannot understand why exactly someone should be acting like that. Asshole management begins with asshole understanding. Much as Machiavelli illuminated political strategy for princes, this book finally gives us the concepts to think or say why assholes disturb us so, and explains why such people seem part of the human social condition, especially in an age of raging narcissism and unbridled capitalism. These concepts are also practically useful, as understanding the asshole we are stuck with helps us think constructively about how to handle problems he (and they are mostly all men) presents. We get a better sense of when the asshole is best resisted, and when he is best ignored—a better sense of what is, and what is not, worth fighting for.
Author: Sweary McLeary
Publisher: Independently Published
ISBN: 9781793929815
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 122
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Book Description
This funny and cute notebook is perfect as a valentines day, anniversary or birthday gift! 6x9 Soft matte cover 120 pages of lined paper More useful than a card: )
Author: Halle Kaye
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781475039481
Category : Courtship
Languages : en
Pages : 0
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Book Description
A straight-talking dating guide for women.
Author: Bess Kalb
Publisher: Vintage
ISBN: 0525654720
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 224
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Book Description
NATIONAL BESTSELLER ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: VOGUE • FORBES • BOOKPAGE • NEW YORK POST • WIRED “I have not been as profoundly moved by a book in years.” —Jodi Picoult Even after she left home for Hollywood, Emmy-nominated TV writer Bess Kalb saved every voicemail her grandmother Bobby Bell ever left her. Bobby was a force—irrepressible, glamorous, unapologetically opinionated. Bobby doted on Bess; Bess adored Bobby. Then, at ninety, Bobby died. But in this debut memoir, Bobby is speaking to Bess once more, in a voice as passionate as it ever was in life. Recounting both family lore and family secrets, Bobby brings us four generations of indomitable women and the men who loved them. There’s Bobby’s mother, who traveled solo from Belarus to America in the 1880s to escape the pogroms, and Bess’s mother, a 1970s rebel who always fought against convention. But it was Bobby and Bess who always had the most powerful bond: Bobby her granddaughter’s fiercest supporter, giving Bess unequivocal love, even if sometimes of the toughest kind. Nobody Will Tell You This But Me marks the creation of a totally new, virtuosic form of memoir: a reconstruction of a beloved grandmother’s words and wisdom to tell her family’s story with equal parts poignancy and hilarity.
Author: Kara Kinney Cartwright
Publisher: Rodale Books
ISBN: 0593138481
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 194
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Book Description
Take it from a mom who raised two teenage boys into actual humans—yes, they can and do change. This is her tough love and candid advice on being a good guy in a world full of assh*les. Have you ever returned the family car with less than a quarter tank left? Or gotten a technical in a rec-league basketball game? If so, you might be an assh*le—or you’re at least acting like one. But there’s hope for you yet! As it turns out, everyone needs to learn one major lesson to safely avoid assh*le territory: Other people are also humans. (Whoa.) This frank, funny, and necessary guidebook contains everything young men need to know to have positive interactions, make better decisions, and recognize when they’re being jerks. Things like, just don’t be an assh*le . . . • To your family: Parents are not your servants. • To your friends: They’ll laugh at you, not with you. • At work: No one wants to hear your podcast idea. • To women: “Are you up?” doesn’t qualify as romance. • Online: If you wouldn’t do it in real life, don’t do it. • In real life: People unlike you are also people. • To yourself: It’s okay not to have all the answers. And if someone got you this book, don’t be an assh*le to them. Instead, consider this a gentle nudge in a different direction.
Author: Robert I. Sutton
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 1328695921
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 229
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Book Description
“This book is a contemporary classic—a shrewd and spirited guide to protecting ourselves from the jerks, bullies, tyrants, and trolls who seek to demean. We desperately need this antidote to the a-holes in our midst.”—Daniel H. Pink, best-selling author of To Sell Is Human and Drive How to avoid, outwit, and disarm assholes, from the author of the classic The No Asshole Rule As entertaining as it is useful, The Asshole Survival Guide delivers a cogent and methodical game plan for anybody who feels plagued by assholes. Sutton starts with diagnosis—what kind of asshole problem, exactly, are you dealing with? From there, he provides field-tested, evidence-based, and often surprising strategies for dealing with assholes—avoiding them, outwitting them, disarming them, sending them packing, and developing protective psychological armor. Sutton even teaches readers how to look inward to stifle their own inner jackass. Ultimately, this survival guide is about developing an outlook and personal plan that will help you preserve the sanity in your work life, and rescue all those perfectly good days from being ruined by some jerk. “Thought-provoking and often hilarious . . . An indispensable resource.”—Gretchen Rubin, best-selling author of The Happiness Project and Better Than Before “At last . . . clear steps for rejecting, deflecting, and deflating the jerks who blight our lives . . . Useful, evidence-based, and fun to read.”—Robert Cialdini, best-selling author of Influence and Pre-Suasion
Author: Roger Ebert
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
ISBN: 0446584983
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 353
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Book Description
Named one of the 100 greatest film books of all time by The Hollywood Reporter, this singular, warm-hearted, inspiring look at life itself is "the best thing Mr. Ebert has ever written" (Janet Maslin, New York Times). "To make ourselves unhappy is where all crime starts. We must try to contribute joy to the world. That is true no matter what our problems, our health, our circumstances. We must try. I didn't always know this, and am happy I lived long enough to find it out." Roger Ebert was the best-known film critic of his time. He began reviewing films for the Chicago Sun-Times in1967, and was the first film critic ever to win a Pulitzer Prize. He appeared on television for four decades. In 2006, complications from thyroid cancer treatment resulted in the loss of his abi)lity to eat, drink, or speak. But with the loss of his voice, Ebert became a more prolific and influential writer. And in Life Itself he told the full, dramatic story of his life and career. In this candid, personal history, Ebert chronicled it all: his loves, losses, and obsessions; his struggle and recovery from alcoholism; his marriage; his politics; and his spiritual beliefs. He wrote about his years at the Sun-Times, his colorful newspaper friends, and his life-changing collaboration with Gene Siskel. He shared his insights into movie stars and directors like John Wayne and Martin Scorsese. This is a story that only Roger Ebert could tell, filled with the same deep insight, dry wit, and sharp observations that his readers have long cherished,
Author: Brooke Summers
Publisher: Brooke Summers
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 204
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Book Description
The past should be left in the past. Just like the mystery man, who rocked Mia's world. When Mia goes home for the summer to meet her new step-father, she gets the shock of her life... Her step–brother is the guy who she's been dreaming of, her mystery man who she can’t forget. When these two get together they explode. But Hudson has a dark secret. He’s a Kingpin. The drug lord. The man that nightmares are made of. What happens when Mia finds out? Will she run? If she does Hudson knows he will search every inch of the world to find her.
