The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks

The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks PDF Author: Dan Indante
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 0312310846
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 290

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Book Description
This sadistic, hysterical relationship book outlines how women can be manipulated, frustrated, and ultimately dominated throughout the course of a man's life.

The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks

The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks PDF Author: Dan Indante
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 0312310846
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 290

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Book Description
This sadistic, hysterical relationship book outlines how women can be manipulated, frustrated, and ultimately dominated throughout the course of a man's life.

Ascent of the A-Word

Ascent of the A-Word PDF Author: Geoffrey Nunberg
Publisher:
ISBN: 1610391756
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 274

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Book Description
An attention-grabbing, thought-provoking exploration of the life of the word "asshole," by a renowned linguist and author

The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks

The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks PDF Author: Dan Indante
Publisher: Macmillan + ORM
ISBN: 1466843713
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 263

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Book Description
Congratulations, man! By picking up The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks, you are just pages away from finally understanding: - How a five-dollar date can get you laid - How to stop being friends with girls and start getting them in the sack - Where you'll have the best odds of finding a one-night stand, and how to get rid of the chick the next morning - How to trick a woman into thinking you're classy, even if you have holes in your underwear - Why fat chicks always try to keep you from banging their hot friends, and how to finally stop these evil creatures - How to stop your wife from nagging you into an early grave - Why it's possible to watch six hours of football, put the moves on your neighbor's hot daughter, and leave the toilet seat up in the same day - And much more The Complete A**hole's Guide isn't like all the other candy-ass relationship books on the market; it doesn't cover issues like romance, love, and finding Miss Right. So, if that's what you're looking for, there are plenty of other books you can hide under your skirt as you skip out of the store. This book is about controlling the women in your life, and never having to say you're sorry . . . EVER AGAIN! We'll take you from the day you're born to the day you die and show you how women can be manipulated, frustrated, and ultimately dominated throughout the course of a man's life. By illustrating the insanity of the female mind, we'll show you why the flawed chick psyche causes them to continuously fall for the a**hole, no matter how many times they get burned. If you're not interested, that's fine. We're sure there are ballet classes you need to attend before your wine and cheese party. However, if you are ready, then grab a six-pack, order a pizza, and get your hand out of your pants because you're about to read the most perverse, sadistic, and hysterical relationship book ever written. Enjoy!

The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America

The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America PDF Author: Matt Kracht
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 1452177392
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 178

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Book Description
National bestselling book: Featured on Midwest, Mountain Plains, New Atlantic, Northern, Pacific Northwest and Southern Regional Indie Bestseller Lists Perfect book for the birder and anti-birder alike A humorous look at 50 common North American dumb birds: For those who have a disdain for birds or bird lovers with a sense of humor, this snarky, illustrated handbook is equal parts profane, funny, and—let's face it—true. Featuring common North American birds, such as the White-Breasted Butt Nugget and the Goddamned Canada Goose (or White-Breasted Nuthatch and Canada Goose for the layperson), Matt Kracht identifies all the idiots in your backyard and details exactly why they suck with humorous, yet angry, ink drawings. With The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America, you won't need to wonder what all that racket is anymore! • Each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more. • The essential guide to all things wings with migratory maps, tips for birding, musings on the avian population, and the ethics of birdwatching. • Matt Kracht is an amateur birder, writer, and illustrator who enjoys creating books that celebrate the humor inherent in life's absurdities. Based in Seattle, he enjoys gazing out the window at the beautiful waters of Puget Sound and making fun of birds. "There are loads of books out there for bird lovers, but until now, nothing for those that love to hate birds. The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America fills the void, packed with snarky illustrations that chastise the flying animals in a funny, profane way. " – Uncrate A humorous animal book with 50 common North American birds for people who love birds and also those who love to hate birds • A perfect coffee table or bar top conversation-starting book • Makes a great Mother's Day, Father's Day, birthday, or retirement gift

The Complete A**Hole Dad

The Complete A**Hole Dad PDF Author: Dan Indante
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781940207049
Category : Families
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Dan Zaharoni is an asshole. He also happens to be a father. In this hilarious, often touching, book, Zaharoni gives the advice every parent secretly wants to hear: how to be an asshole, without truly screwing up your kids. The Baby Boomers had Dr. Spock, the Millennials are now stuck with The Complete A**Hole Dad, a viciously hysterical commentary on the state of parenting in the twenty-first century. Author Dan Indante, co-author of the bestselling Complete A**Hole’s Guide to Handling Chicks, has grown up and focused his sarcastic wit on the nearest and most innocent target--his children. Indante walks through nearly one hundred stories of his own parental incompetence while skewering the even greater incompetence of every father he’s had the misfortune of coming across at PTA meetings, Little League baseball games, and tequila-fueled six year old birthday parties.

Field Guide to Chicks of the United States

Field Guide to Chicks of the United States PDF Author: Joe Bovino
Publisher: Chickspotting, LLC
ISBN: 9780985847302
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Joe Bovino's Field Guide to Chicks of the United States is the definitive chick guide - the ultimate visual resource for American chickspotting. It's outlandishly hilarious, spot-on accurate, provocatively illustrated, and organized like a field guide to birds, with a series of 2-page profiles on women from over 90 regional, ethnic, and other American subcultures (or species). It's a must-read and for the active and armchair chickspotter in all of us.

Holes

Holes PDF Author: Louis Sachar
Publisher: Yearling
ISBN: 0307798364
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 251

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Book Description
This groundbreaking classic is now available in a special anniversary edition with bonus content. Winner of the Newbery Medal as well as the National Book Award, HOLES is a New York Times bestseller and one of the strongest-selling middle-grade books to ever hit shelves! Stanley Yelnats is under a curse. A curse that began with his no-good-dirty-rotten-pig-stealing-great-great-grandfather and has since followed generations of Yelnatses. Now Stanley has been unjustly sent to a boys' detention center, Camp Green Lake, where the boys build character by spending all day, every day digging holes exactly five feet wide and five feet deep. There is no lake at Camp Green Lake. But there are an awful lot of holes. It doesn't take long for Stanley to realize there's more than character improvement going on at Camp Green Lake. The boys are digging holes because the warden is looking for something. But what could be buried under a dried-up lake? Stanley tries to dig up the truth in this inventive and darkly humorous tale of crime and punishment —and redemption. Special anniversary edition bonus content includes: A New Note From the Author!; "Ten Things You May Not Know About HOLES" by Louis Sachar; and more!

The Asshole Survival Guide

The Asshole Survival Guide PDF Author: Robert I. Sutton
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 1328695921
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 229

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Book Description
“This book is a contemporary classic—a shrewd and spirited guide to protecting ourselves from the jerks, bullies, tyrants, and trolls who seek to demean. We desperately need this antidote to the a-holes in our midst.”—Daniel H. Pink, best-selling author of To Sell Is Human and Drive How to avoid, outwit, and disarm assholes, from the author of the classic The No Asshole Rule As entertaining as it is useful, The Asshole Survival Guide delivers a cogent and methodical game plan for anybody who feels plagued by assholes. Sutton starts with diagnosis—what kind of asshole problem, exactly, are you dealing with? From there, he provides field-tested, evidence-based, and often surprising strategies for dealing with assholes—avoiding them, outwitting them, disarming them, sending them packing, and developing protective psychological armor. Sutton even teaches readers how to look inward to stifle their own inner jackass. Ultimately, this survival guide is about developing an outlook and personal plan that will help you preserve the sanity in your work life, and rescue all those perfectly good days from being ruined by some jerk. “Thought-provoking and often hilarious . . . An indispensable resource.”—Gretchen Rubin, best-selling author of The Happiness Project and Better Than Before “At last . . . clear steps for rejecting, deflecting, and deflating the jerks who blight our lives . . . Useful, evidence-based, and fun to read.”—Robert Cialdini, best-selling author of Influence and Pre-Suasion

If I Stay

If I Stay PDF Author: Gayle Forman
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 1101046341
Category : Young Adult Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 207

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Book Description
Heart-wrenchingly raw and heartbreakingly romantic, Gayle Forman’s international bestseller asks the ultimate question: What would you do if you had to choose? “Beautifully written.”—Entertainment Weekly “Every moment I spent reading Forman’s masterpiece drew me in more.”—NPR.com Everything can change in an instant. For Mia, the day started like any other, surrounded by a loving family, an adoring boyfriend, and a bright future filled with music and infinite possibilities. What she never expected is the choice before her now. Caught between life and death, between a happy past and an uncertain future, Mia has to contemplate everything she holds dear and make a choice: to go or to stay. Adapted into a major motion picture starring Chloe Grace Moretz, Mia's story will stay with you for a long, long time.

House of Leaves

House of Leaves PDF Author: Mark Z. Danielewski
Publisher: Pantheon
ISBN: 0375420525
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 738

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Book Description
THE MIND-BENDING CULT CLASSIC ABOUT A HOUSE THAT’S LARGER ON THE INSIDE THAN ON THE OUTSIDE • A masterpiece of horror and an astonishingly immersive, maze-like reading experience that redefines the boundaries of a novel. ''Simultaneously reads like a thriller and like a strange, dreamlike excursion into the subconscious." —Michiko Kakutani, The New York Times "Thrillingly alive, sublimely creepy, distressingly scary, breathtakingly intelligent—it renders most other fiction meaningless." —Bret Easton Ellis, bestselling author of American Psycho “This demonically brilliant book is impossible to ignore.” —Jonathan Lethem, award-winning author of Motherless Brooklyn One of The Atlantic’s Great American Novels of the Past 100 Years Years ago, when House of Leaves was first being passed around, it was nothing more than a badly bundled heap of paper, parts of which would occasionally surface on the Internet. No one could have anticipated the small but devoted following this terrifying story would soon command. Starting with an odd assortment of marginalized youth—musicians, tattoo artists, programmers, strippers, environmentalists, and adrenaline junkies—the book eventually made its way into the hands of older generations, who not only found themselves in those strangely arranged pages but also discovered a way back into the lives of their estranged children. Now made available in book form, complete with the original colored words, vertical footnotes, and second and third appendices, the story remains unchanged. Similarly, the cultural fascination with House of Leaves remains as fervent and as imaginative as ever. The novel has gone on to inspire doctorate-level courses and masters theses, cultural phenomena like the online urban legend of “the backrooms,” and incredible works of art in entirely unrealted mediums from music to video games. Neither Pulitzer Prize-winning photojournalist Will Navidson nor his companion Karen Green was prepared to face the consequences of the impossibility of their new home, until the day their two little children wandered off and their voices eerily began to return another story—of creature darkness, of an ever-growing abyss behind a closet door, and of that unholy growl which soon enough would tear through their walls and consume all their dreams.