The Best Jokes I've Heard

The Best Jokes I've Heard PDF Author: Douglas Blankenship
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1477231889
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 649

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Book Description
Imagine these endorsements The joke is on you if you dont buy this book. Jay Leno Blankenship has an uncanny sense of humor that crosses all boundaries of fun. Everyone will laugh hysterically at these jokes. David Letterman There is no doubt that this is the funniest collection of jokes ever - I say ever - compiled. Buy it! Jimmy Kimmel Laughter is a constant vacation. Take the best vacation of your life for less than thirty dollars. Mary Lou Whitty When I read this book, I must have laughed a thousand times. The humor here is global in perspective, and Douglas Blankenship is dead center with this book. It has to be a best seller, no doubt. Mary Lou Cook United States Marines

The Best Jokes I've Heard

The Best Jokes I've Heard PDF Author: Douglas Blankenship
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1477231889
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 649

Get Book Here

Book Description
Imagine these endorsements The joke is on you if you dont buy this book. Jay Leno Blankenship has an uncanny sense of humor that crosses all boundaries of fun. Everyone will laugh hysterically at these jokes. David Letterman There is no doubt that this is the funniest collection of jokes ever - I say ever - compiled. Buy it! Jimmy Kimmel Laughter is a constant vacation. Take the best vacation of your life for less than thirty dollars. Mary Lou Whitty When I read this book, I must have laughed a thousand times. The humor here is global in perspective, and Douglas Blankenship is dead center with this book. It has to be a best seller, no doubt. Mary Lou Cook United States Marines

Pretty Good Joke Book

Pretty Good Joke Book PDF Author: Garrison Keillor
Publisher: Blackstone Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages :

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Book Description
Over 2,200 Jokes from America’s favorite live radio show A treasury of hilarity from Garrison Keillor and the cast of public radio’s A Prairie Home Companion. A guy walks into a bar. Eight Canada Geese walk into a bar. A termite jumps up on the bar and asks, “Where is the bar tender?” Drum roll. The Sixth Edition of the perennially popular Pretty Good Joke Book is everything the first five were and more. More puns, one-liners, light bulb jokes, knock-knock jokes, and third-grader jokes (have you heard the one about Elvis Parsley?). More religion jokes, political jokes, lawyer jokes, blonde jokes, and jokes in questionable taste (Why did the urologist lose his license? He got in trouble with his peers). More jokes about chickens, relationships, and senior moments (the nice thing about Alzheimer’s is you can enjoy the same jokes again and again). It all started back in 1996, when A Prairie Home Companion fans laughed themselves silly during the first Joke Show. The broadcast was such a hit that it became an almost-annual gagfest. Then fans wanted to read the jokes, share them, and pass them around, and the first Pretty Good Joke Book was born. With over 200 new and updated jokes, the latest edition promises countless giggles, chortles, and guffaws anyone—fans of the radio show or not—will enjoy.

Speaking My Mind

Speaking My Mind PDF Author: Ronald Reagan
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0743271114
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 436

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Book Description
The most important speeches of America's "Great Communicator": Here, in his own words, is the record of Ronald Reagan's remarkable political career and historic eight-year presidency.

Stop Me If You've Heard This: A History and Philosophy of Jokes

Stop Me If You've Heard This: A History and Philosophy of Jokes PDF Author: Jim Holt
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 0393069443
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 160

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Book Description
“Finally I understand what it is I’ve been laughing at all these years.”—Jimmy Kimmel From the best-selling author of Why Does the World Exist? comes this outrageous, uproarious compendium of absurdity, filth, racy paradox, and gratuitous offensiveness—just the kind of mature philosophical reflection readers have come to expect from the ever-entertaining Jim Holt. Indeed, Stop Me If You’ve Heard This is the first book to trace the evolution of the joke all the way from the standup comics of ancient Athens to the comedy-club Seinfelds of today. After exploring humor’s history in Part One, Holt delves into philosophy in Part Two: Wall Street jokes; jokes about rednecks and atheists, bulimics and politicians; jokes you missed if you didn’t go to a Catholic girls’ school; jokes about logic and existence itself . . . all became fodder for the grand theories of Aristotle, Kant, Freud, and Wittgenstein in this heady mix of the high and low, of the ribald and profound, from America’s most beloved philosophical pundit.

The Funniest Jokes You Never Heard

The Funniest Jokes You Never Heard PDF Author: Carbone
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781546780137
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 68

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Book Description
Hilarious jokes you have never heard! Jokes for Adults that will make you laugh hard! You will have a wonderful time finally reading new sidesplitting jokes. Adult, very funny jokes that are fresh and hysterical. You will be the life of the party!

The Laugh-a-Day Book of Bloopers, Quotes & Good Clean Jokes

The Laugh-a-Day Book of Bloopers, Quotes & Good Clean Jokes PDF Author: Jim Kraus
Publisher: Baker Books
ISBN: 0800720865
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 224

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Book Description
A 365-day humor collection: each day includes a joke, a wacky church bulletin blooper, and a humorous quote.

The Best Jokes I've Ever Heard...

The Best Jokes I've Ever Heard... PDF Author: Kevin Larson
Publisher: CreateSpace
ISBN: 9781439213506
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 126

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Book Description


Best Jokes: I Have Ever Heard - 800 Jokes

Best Jokes: I Have Ever Heard - 800 Jokes PDF Author: Manik Joshi
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781520112145
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 400

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Book Description
It took me 20 years to compile 800 best jokes. You will find all sorts of jokes in this collection - Animal jokes, Aviation jokes, Baby jokes, Bar Jokes, Beauty jokes, Bicycle jokes, Bird jokes, Birthday jokes, Blind jokes, Blonde jokes, Bus jokes, Business jokes, Cannibal jokes, Children Jokes, College jokes, Computer jokes, Criminal jokes, Dead and dying jokes, Dentist jokes, Divorce jokes, Doctor jokes, Family jokes, Farmer jokes, Firefighter jokes, Food jokes, Gender Jokes, Hunting jokes, Husband and wife jokes, Internet jokes, Judge jokes, Kids' jokes, Lawyer jokes, Lotto jokes, Marriage jokes, Men jokes, Mental health jokes, Military jokes, Money jokes, Occupation Jokes, Office jokes, Old age jokes, Parent jokes, Police jokes, Political Jokes, Religious jokes, Salesmen jokes, School jokes, Women jokes And OthersSample This:001. Sign LanguageA group from Chicago spent a weekend gambling in Las Vegas. One of the men on that trip won $100,000. He didn't want anyone to know about it, so he decided not to return with the others, but took a later plane home - arriving back 3 a.m. He immediately went out to the backyard of his house, dug a hole and planted the money in it. The following morning he walked outside and found only an empty hole. He noticed footsteps leading from the hole to the house next door, which was owned by a deaf-mute. On the same street lived a professor who understood sign language and was a friend of the deaf man. Grabbing his pistol, the enraged man went to awaken the professor and dragged him to the deaf man's house. "You tell this guy that if he doesn't give me back my $100,000 I'm going to kill him!" he screamed at the professor. The professor conveyed the message to his friend, and his friend replied in sign language, "I hid it in my backyard, underneath the cherry tree." The professor turned to the man with the gun and said, "He's not going to tell you. He said he'd rather die first."***************002. Dead DogJoe was a steward for Fly High airlines. He watched as an older lady boarded the plane holding a dog in a cage. "Excuse me," said Joe "dogs are not allowed on board, you have to check it in with the baggage." The lady wasn't happy, but Joe was an experienced steward and succeeded in convincing the lady without much of a scene. Upon arrival, Joe took a peek in the cage, and to his great surprise, saw that the dog was dead! Frantic that they may get sued, Joe quickly sent one of his underlings out to town to buy a dog that looked exactly the same. Just in the nick of time the underling arrived with the dog. They quickly switched dogs and breathed a sigh of relief. "This isn't my dog!" said the lady as soon as she saw it. "I'm sure it is" insisted Joe "I was very careful about where I put it." "It's not my dog" argued the lady, "you see, I was bringing my dog to my home town to have him buried, and this dog is alive!"***************003. Magic TrickTwo thieves each sneak into a rich man's party. During dinner the thieves marveled at how even the cutlery was made of gold, and both decided they would try to steal some. The first thief quietly slipped a golden spoon into his pocket, unaware that the second thief had witnessed this crime. After dinner, the second thief comes up with a way to steal a golden spoon without suspicion being placed on him. He picks up a golden spoon identical to the first and holds it up in front of the party-goers explaining he wishes to show them a magic trick. "And now..." he speaks to the crowd and points towards the first thief, "I will put this spoon into my pocket, and remove it from this gentleman here's own pocket!"***************

Jokes for Blokes

Jokes for Blokes PDF Author: Llewellyn Dowd
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 144649148X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 578

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Book Description
What is the difference between a dog and a fox? About 9 pints What do you call a man with a 2 inch penis? Justin What's pink and hard in the morning? The Financial Times crossword Did you hear about the consignment of Viagra pills stolen from a warehouse? Police are on the lookout for hardened criminals An aeroplane is about to crash, when a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, 'If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman.' She removes all her clothing and asks, 'Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?' A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, 'Here, iron this!' The greatest ever collection of dirty jokes guaranteed to offend and outrage the prudish. Full of hilarious gags, it's totally politically incorrect, unashamedly x-rated and downright filthy. Definitely one to keep well out of the way of the mother-in-law...

Jolly Jokes for Older Folks

Jolly Jokes for Older Folks PDF Author: Bob Phillips
Publisher: Harvest House Publishers
ISBN: 0736934952
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 178

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Book Description
Bestselling author Bob Phillips has compiled yet another great collection of quirky quips and zany zingers that will charm and delight the young-at-heart and everyone who appreciates a little laughter in their lives. Stories of wacky waiters, loony lawyers, and daffy doctors will entertain readers while providing conversation starters for coffee or other get-togethers. An exasperated salesman abandoned his car in a no-parking zone and left this note: "I've circled this block 20 times. I have an appointment and must keep it or lose my job. Forgive us our trespasses." Upon returning, he found this note: "I've circled this block 20 years. If I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation." Patient: Doctor, doctor, I have a serious memory problem. I can't remember a thing. Doctor: How long have you had this problem? Patient: What problem? Alphabetized so readers can find just the right joke to suit their fancy, Jolly Jokes for Older Folks provides lighthearted moments for everyone who's been around long enough to laugh at themselves and others.