More Letters from a Nut

More Letters from a Nut PDF Author: Ted L. Nancy
Publisher: Bantam
ISBN: 0804149801
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 876

Get Book Here

Book Description
Seinfeld. For more than 33 million viewers, the Emmy Award-winning television show has become a Thursday night ritual. Now, even though the show has ended, Jerry Seinfeld's distinct brand of humor can still be yours. Ted L. Nancy's first book, Letters from a Nut, with an introduction by Jerry Seinfeld, now has more than 225,000 copies in print. In More Letters From a Nut, master-prankster Nancy shares even more sidesplittingly funny letters he has written and the unbelievable true responses he has received.

More Letters from a Nut

More Letters from a Nut PDF Author: Ted L. Nancy
Publisher: Bantam
ISBN: 0804149801
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 876

Get Book Here

Book Description
Seinfeld. For more than 33 million viewers, the Emmy Award-winning television show has become a Thursday night ritual. Now, even though the show has ended, Jerry Seinfeld's distinct brand of humor can still be yours. Ted L. Nancy's first book, Letters from a Nut, with an introduction by Jerry Seinfeld, now has more than 225,000 copies in print. In More Letters From a Nut, master-prankster Nancy shares even more sidesplittingly funny letters he has written and the unbelievable true responses he has received.

Letters from a Nut

Letters from a Nut PDF Author: Ted L. Nancy
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0063084821
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 280

Get Book Here

Book Description
Who is Ted L. Nancy? He's a superstitious Vegas high-roller who wants to gamble at a casino in his lucky shrimp outfit... He's the genius inventor of "Six Day Underwear"... He's a stage actor who only travels while dressed as a stick of butter... He is, in reality, a twisted prankster—a supremely off-kilter alter ego who sends patently ridiculous letters to corporate honchos, entertainment conglomerates, national publications, politicians, celebrities and heads of state. His innocent requests, queries, complaints, demands, and suggestions are so absurd it is amazing they fool anyone—but often the deadpan responses he receives are even more hilarious: "Dear Mr. Nancy, It is not often that we receive such enthusiastic support for the paper bag." —The Paper Bag Council "On behalf of Greyhound, there should be no problem traveling while in your butter costume." —Greyhound Bus Lines "I look forward to working with you to create a better future for this great nation." —Vice President Al Gore Letters From A Nut is an insanely inspired, truly madcap collection of Nancy correspondence, a wet-yourself-in-a-public place funny aggregation of official—and officially certifiable—requests, complaints, fan mail and questions that could not possibly have been taken seriously...but, amazingly, were.

Extra Nutty! Even More Letters from a Nut!

Extra Nutty! Even More Letters from a Nut! PDF Author: Ted Nancy
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 9780312261559
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 244

Get Book Here

Book Description
Welcome to the world of Ted L. Nancy. Some have called him inspired, some have called him a goofball, and many have wondered who Ted really is. All we know is that Ted loves to write and it shows-Extra Nutty! is chock full of nut, a record of real live correspondence from America's favorite pen pal to a cross-section of this great nation. Extra Nutty! is bursting with all new letters showing Ted at his looniest. Take, for example, this: Dear Business Permits Dept.: I want to apply for a business permit in your fine city...I operate the Soup & Sleep Restaurants. You can either order soup or sleep. A hostess will greet you and you would say, "I'd like to sleep." She will lead you to a table where you can catch a few winks. Or this: Dear Helena Ocean & Dog Licensing Dept: I will stage the play "Mark Twain with Tourette's Syndrome.". . . Let me know what arrangements I need to make to store my anchovie tank at your seaport. Thank you. I await large crowds. Or even this: Dear Kmart: I have invented a male underpants liner...This liner fits right in your shorts and can be thrown away after 15 weeks. I have been wearing the same pair of underwear for 105 days now and although they feel a little stretchy they are perfectly clean. Ted's unique way of looking at the world-and how the world responds to Ted's schemes--is captured here in this extra nutty, hugely hilarious collection.

All New Letters from a Nut

All New Letters from a Nut PDF Author: Ted L. Nancy
Publisher: Crown Archetype
ISBN: 0307716287
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 258

Get Book Here

Book Description
The best-selling author of Letters from a Nut presents a latest collection of whimsical correspondence between the author and the unwary establishments, organizations and government offices that attempted to respond to such requests as a hotel room for 300 hamsters and a 59-foot piece of bologna.

Stories from a Moron

Stories from a Moron PDF Author: Ed Broth
Publisher: Macmillan + ORM
ISBN: 1429918152
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 298

Get Book Here

Book Description
A nutty and hilarious book of magazine submissions and letters to and from the editors by the comedian, former Seinfeld writer, and Bee Movie cowriter. Foreword by Jerry Seinfeld Ed writes short stories. He’s prolific. And desperate to get published. But he sends his stories to the wrong magazines. As for the magazines? Well, they don’t mind telling him so: “As a word of advice, it always helps for writers to be familiar with the publications they submit material to.” —Fencers Quarterly Magazine “Dear Ed: Thank you for your recent submission to Steamboat Magazine; it was wonderful to hear how much our magazine has touched you . . .” “Dear Mr. Broth: Thank you for the opportunity to review your article, ‘My Car Ride with Daddy,’ for possible publication in Mushing . . .” With this book, Ed Broth finally sees his work published. His “Stories of Hope & Inspiration” and his “Stories of Meaning & Sacrament” plus his passionate pitches to place his writing in our nation’s premier publications—from Pest Control Magazine to Arthritis Today—are all to be found in the book you hold in your hands. Some might have advised Ed not to send his story “I Love Dogs” to I Love Cats Magazine or to stop submitting revised stories to editors who have already turned them down. But, well, that’s just not the way Ed’s mind works. Studded like a rich cranberry strudel with nuggets of genius—from cartoons and advertisements to Ed’s newspaper articles from across the country—Stories from a Moron is an addictive journey into the mind of a great talent.

Joy In Mudville

Joy In Mudville PDF Author: Dick Schaap
Publisher: Main Street Books
ISBN: 0307786099
Category : Sports & Recreation
Languages : en
Pages : 445

Get Book Here

Book Description
A comic lineup of stories, essays, cartoons, and more, from Lardner and Runyon to Philip Roth, Charles Addams to Charles Schulz, plus dozens of other funny fans. "The best baseball book of the season." -- Los Angeles Times Book Review. B & W photographs and illustrations throughout.

Hello Junk Mail!

Hello Junk Mail! PDF Author: Ted L. Nancy
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780980059212
Category : American wit and humor
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Get Book Here

Book Description
Humour.

Do You Speak American?

Do You Speak American? PDF Author: Robert Macneil
Publisher: Nan A. Talese
ISBN: 0307423573
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 242

Get Book Here

Book Description
Is American English in decline? Are regional dialects dying out? Is there a difference between men and women in how they adapt to linguistic variations? These questions, and more, about our language catapulted Robert MacNeil and William Cran—the authors (with Robert McCrum) of the language classic The Story of English—across the country in search of the answers. Do You Speak American? is the tale of their discoveries, which provocatively show how the standard for American English—if a standard exists—is changing quickly and dramatically. On a journey that takes them from the Northeast, through Appalachia and the Deep South, and west to California, the authors observe everyday verbal interactions and in a host of interviews with native speakers glean the linguistic quirks and traditions characteristic of each area. While examining the histories and controversies surrounding both written and spoken American English, they address anxieties and assumptions that, when explored, are highly emotional, such as the growing influence of Spanish as a threat to American English and the special treatment of African-American vernacular English. And, challenging the purists who think grammatical standards are in serious deterioration and that media saturation of our culture is homogenizing our speech, they surprise us with unpredictable responses. With insight and wit, MacNeil and Cran bring us a compelling book that is at once a celebration and a potent study of our singular language. Each wave of immigration has brought new words to enrich the American language. Do you recognize the origin of 1. blunderbuss, sleigh, stoop, coleslaw, boss, waffle? Or 2. dumb, ouch, shyster, check, kaput, scram, bummer? Or 3. phooey, pastrami, glitch, kibbitz, schnozzle? Or 4. broccoli, espresso, pizza, pasta, macaroni, radio? Or 5. smithereens, lollapalooza, speakeasy, hooligan? Or 6. vamoose, chaps, stampede, mustang, ranch, corral? 1. Dutch 2. German 3. Yiddish 4. Italian 5. Irish 6. Spanish

Wilber Winkle Has a Complaint!

Wilber Winkle Has a Complaint! PDF Author: John Homans
Publisher: Bancroft Press
ISBN: 1890862991
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 453

Get Book Here

Book Description
Is Wilber Winkle a consumer advocate extraordinaire or just a nut with too much time on his hands? Whatever the verdict, this hilarious collection of complaint letters to American corporations and their responses are a laugh-aloud page-turner. Readers everywhere will recognize the beefs that Wilber strives to get to the bottom of: Denny's waitresses disturbing the delicate balance of cream and sugar in their coffee, the disappearance of the almond from the 5th Avenue candy bar, and insulting automotive technicians at Jiffy Lube. After studying Wilber's letter-writing campaigns, readers will learn how to complain the Wilber Winkle Way and translate customer service-ese. An unflinchingly funny look into the world of customer service and one consumer who will not stand for life's little inconveniences.

Idiot Letters

Idiot Letters PDF Author: Paul Rosa
Publisher: Main Street Books
ISBN: 9780385475082
Category : Complaint letters
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Get Book Here

Book Description
Look out, public relations; take cover, customer service -- Paul Rosa's letter is in the mail and his inventively imbecilic queries about consumer products have a way of eliciting equally idiotic and even more unlikely answers from some of America's biggest companies.