Uncle John's Book of Fun Bathroom Reader for Kids Only!

Uncle John's Book of Fun Bathroom Reader for Kids Only! PDF Author: Bathroom Readers' Institute
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1607106663
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 403

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Book Description
All the looniest, wackiest, zaniest grossest jokes, games, puzzles and pranks a kid could ever want in one fun book! Uncle John is back with another For Kids Only masterpiece! Book of Fun is stuffed with wacky facts, gross-out jokes, goofy games, magic tricks, puzzling puzzles, and hilarious pranks. Easy-to-read stories and gags are brought to life with silly illustrations and fun fonts (which research suggests actually help kids build reading and comprehension skills). A sample of the fun to be had: * How to make your own whoopee cushion * Simple calculator tricks to amaze your friends * Classic riddles and mind-boggling brain teasers * Tongue twisters and word games * One-minute mysteries * Silly science tricks * Optical illusions * Lots of jokes . . . like this one: Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils? A: Because they have big fingers. And much, much more!

Uncle John's Book of Fun Bathroom Reader for Kids Only!

Uncle John's Book of Fun Bathroom Reader for Kids Only! PDF Author: Bathroom Readers' Institute
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1607106663
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 403

Get Book Here

Book Description
All the looniest, wackiest, zaniest grossest jokes, games, puzzles and pranks a kid could ever want in one fun book! Uncle John is back with another For Kids Only masterpiece! Book of Fun is stuffed with wacky facts, gross-out jokes, goofy games, magic tricks, puzzling puzzles, and hilarious pranks. Easy-to-read stories and gags are brought to life with silly illustrations and fun fonts (which research suggests actually help kids build reading and comprehension skills). A sample of the fun to be had: * How to make your own whoopee cushion * Simple calculator tricks to amaze your friends * Classic riddles and mind-boggling brain teasers * Tongue twisters and word games * One-minute mysteries * Silly science tricks * Optical illusions * Lots of jokes . . . like this one: Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils? A: Because they have big fingers. And much, much more!

Uncle John's The Haunted Outhouse Bathroom Reader For Kids Only!

Uncle John's The Haunted Outhouse Bathroom Reader For Kids Only! PDF Author: Bathroom Readers' Institute
Publisher: Portable Press
ISBN: 9781607107842
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Horror, history, science, mystery . . . and eerily twisted tales. Follow Uncle John into a world so frighteningly funny it could only come from the Bathroom Readers Institute. What do you get when you cross a classic scary story such as “The Tell-tale Heart” with Uncle John’s trademark sense of humor? You get “The Tell-tale Fart” (Pee-uw!). And that’s just one of many twisted classic and original tales of humor and horror you’ll find inside The Haunted Outhouse. You’ll also find a spine-tingling collection of facts about topics such as real-life mad scientists, history’s terrible tyrants, and the world’s deadliest weather. Uncle John’s scare-fest is packed with page after page of crafts, recipes, poems, jokes, tongue twisters, and experiments straight from Dr. Johnenstein’s Laboratory. Graphic novel-style tales add plenty of illustrated pages to the mix. This haunted book of horrors could only come from the Bathroom Readers Institute, and it’s “For Kids Only.” ENTER IF YOU DARE! You’ll find terrifying tales, including… - Revenge of the Meatloaf - The Legend of Peepee Hollow - The Creature from the Black Lagoon and the No Good, Very Bad Day - The Haunted Outhouse Frightening facts about… - The Curse of Amen-Ra - The Attack of the Cow Lady - Decay-causing Tooth Worms - The FBI’s Body Farm Horrifying things to do like… - Make a Bouncing Eyeball - Prank Your Friends with Caramel Onions - Craft a Barbie Zombie Hat - Serve Bloody Band-Aid Treats (Gag!)

Uncle John's Hindsight Is 20/20 Bathroom Reader

Uncle John's Hindsight Is 20/20 Bathroom Reader PDF Author: Bathroom Readers' Institute
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1645178951
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 416

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Book Description
This 34th annual edition of Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader offers an all-new collection of fascinating trivia, strange-but-true oddities, and the ever-popular stories of dumb crooks! Uncle John’s Hindsight Is 2020 Bathroom Reader is packed with tons of new articles from the worlds of pop culture, history, and science to help you get everything out of your system the next time you visit the throne room! Articles range in length from a single page to extended page-turners, each as entertaining as the last. From iconic television roles that almost weren’t to the origins of comic books, this 34th edition of fascinating trivia, hilarious lists, and notable quotes compiled by Uncle John and his team at the Bathroom Readers’ Institute will set your mind free to roam the world—and you won’t even need to leave the house!

Uncle John's Creature Feature Bathroom Reader For Kids Only!

Uncle John's Creature Feature Bathroom Reader For Kids Only! PDF Author: Bathroom Readers' Institute
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1607106671
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 434

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Book Description
Get ready to walk on the wild side! Once upon a time, Uncle John set his ghouls on a task to create three new For Kids Only! books: Strange & Scary, Wild & Woolly, and Under the Slimy Sea. But then a giant green creature oozed out of the muck and gobbled them all up! And what did that horrible thing spit out? This book--Creature Feature! It’s bubbling over with more than 400 pages of blood-curdling facts, gut-wrenching activities, cringe-inducing jokes, and head-spinning true stories--all made even more icky by all the freaky photographs and illustrations. Whether it walks, limps, gallops, flies, crawls, swims, or just sits there and makes fart noises--chances are you’ll encounter it in Creature Feature. So have a spooky good time checking out . . . * The World's Smelliest Sneaker * Dog-sized horses and horse-sized dogs * The great ball of snot * An armadillo invasion and a turtle traffic jam * Zombies, Bigfoot, and “the mothman” * How to make your own mummy * Why polar bears don't eat penguins * Vengeful ghosts and haunted castles * And much more! Don't say we didn't warn you.

Uncle John's Actual and Factual Bathroom Reader

Uncle John's Actual and Factual Bathroom Reader PDF Author: Bathroom Readers' Institute
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1684124980
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 771

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Book Description
It’s an actual fact—Uncle John is the most entertaining thing in the bathroom! Uncle John and his team of devoted researchers are back again with an all-new collection of weird news stories, odd historical events, dubious “scientific” theories, jaw-dropping lists, and more. This entertaining 31st anniversary edition contains 512 pages of all-new articles that will appeal to readers everywhere. Pop culture, history, dumb crooks, and other actual and factual tidbits are packed onto every page of this book. Inside, you’ll find . . . Dogs and cats who ran for political office The bizarre method people in Victorian England used to resuscitate drowning victims The man who met his future pet—a stray dog—while running across the Gobi Desert Searching for Planet X—the last unknown planet in our solar system Twantrums—strange Twitter rants that had disastrous effects The true story of Boaty McBoatface And much more!

The Lost Diaries of Susanna Moodie

The Lost Diaries of Susanna Moodie PDF Author: Cecily Ross
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 1443450219
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 262

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Book Description
Engrossing historical fiction for readers of Bride of New France and The Birth House about one of Canada’s most inimitable pioneers and her struggles to survive in the wilderness, brought beautifully to life in this accomplished debut Teetering on the edge of genteel poverty, Englishwoman Susanna Moodie agrees to leave behind her growing career as a writer to follow her husband from her beloved Suffolk to the backwoods of Canada. John Moodie is an ebullient man with a weakness for money-making schemes, and he is convinced that riches await them in the New World. It is the 1830s, and despite their dreams, Susanna is woefully unprepared for life in the wilderness. Susanna Moodie’s true story of hardship and survival in a log cabin deep in the bush is part of our national mythology. Now, respected writer and editor Cecily Ross gives us an unprecedented fictional portrait of Susanna—the sister, the wife, the mother, the writer—a woman confronting both the wilds of Canada and the wilderness of her own heart. Told through imagined lost diaries, the novel explores Susanna’s complex inner life from childhood through to the worst challenges of pioneering in a harsh and unforgiving landscape with her devoted but hapless and often absent spouse. Part love story, part coming-of-age narrative, this captivating novel brings to vivid life Moodie’s courage, wit and strength, as well as her moments of despair. The Lost Diaries of Susanna Moodie shows how one woman, against all odds and adversity, prevails and makes this savage and beautiful land her own.

Long Way Down

Long Way Down PDF Author: Jason Reynolds
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1481438271
Category : Young Adult Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 333

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Book Description
“An intense snapshot of the chain reaction caused by pulling a trigger.” —Booklist (starred review) “Astonishing.” —Kirkus Reviews (starred review) “A tour de force.” —Publishers Weekly (starred review) A Newbery Honor Book A Coretta Scott King Honor Book A Printz Honor Book A Time Best YA Book of All Time (2021) A Los Angeles Times Book Prize Winner for Young Adult Literature Longlisted for the National Book Award for Young People’s Literature Winner of the Walter Dean Myers Award An Edgar Award Winner for Best Young Adult Fiction Parents’ Choice Gold Award Winner An Entertainment Weekly Best YA Book of 2017 A Vulture Best YA Book of 2017 A Buzzfeed Best YA Book of 2017 An ode to Put the Damn Guns Down, this is New York Times bestselling author Jason Reynolds’s electrifying novel that takes place in sixty potent seconds—the time it takes a kid to decide whether or not he’s going to murder the guy who killed his brother. A cannon. A strap. A piece. A biscuit. A burner. A heater. A chopper. A gat. A hammer A tool for RULE Or, you can call it a gun. That’s what fifteen-year-old Will has shoved in the back waistband of his jeans. See, his brother Shawn was just murdered. And Will knows the rules. No crying. No snitching. Revenge. That’s where Will’s now heading, with that gun shoved in the back waistband of his jeans, the gun that was his brother’s gun. He gets on the elevator, seventh floor, stoked. He knows who he’s after. Or does he? As the elevator stops on the sixth floor, on comes Buck. Buck, Will finds out, is who gave Shawn the gun before Will took the gun. Buck tells Will to check that the gun is even loaded. And that’s when Will sees that one bullet is missing. And the only one who could have fired Shawn’s gun was Shawn. Huh. Will didn’t know that Shawn had ever actually USED his gun. Bigger huh. BUCK IS DEAD. But Buck’s in the elevator? Just as Will’s trying to think this through, the door to the next floor opens. A teenage girl gets on, waves away the smoke from Dead Buck’s cigarette. Will doesn’t know her, but she knew him. Knew. When they were eight. And stray bullets had cut through the playground, and Will had tried to cover her, but she was hit anyway, and so what she wants to know, on that fifth floor elevator stop, is, what if Will, Will with the gun shoved in the back waistband of his jeans, MISSES. And so it goes, the whole long way down, as the elevator stops on each floor, and at each stop someone connected to his brother gets on to give Will a piece to a bigger story than the one he thinks he knows. A story that might never know an END…if Will gets off that elevator. Told in short, fierce staccato narrative verse, Long Way Down is a fast and furious, dazzlingly brilliant look at teenage gun violence, as could only be told by Jason Reynolds.

Doctor Sleep

Doctor Sleep PDF Author: Stephen King
Publisher: Pocket Books
ISBN: 1982138866
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 656

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Book Description
Soon to be a major motion picture starring Ewan McGregor! From master storyteller Stephen King, his unforgettable and terrifying sequel to The Shining—an instant #1 New York Times bestseller that is “[a] vivid frightscape” (The New York Times). Years ago, the haunting of the Overlook Hotel nearly broke young Dan Torrance’s sanity, as his paranormal gift known as “the shining” opened a door straight into hell. And even though Dan is all grown up, the ghosts of the Overlook—and his father’s legacy of alcoholism and violence—kept him drifting aimlessly for most of his life. Now, Dan has finally found some order in the chaos by working in a local hospice, earning the nickname “Doctor Sleep” by secretly using his special abilities to comfort the dying and prepare them for the afterlife. But when he unexpectedly meets twelve-year-old Abra Stone—who possesses an even more powerful manifestation of the shining—the two find their lives in sudden jeopardy at the hands of the ageless and murderous nomadic tribe known as the True Knot, reigniting Dan’s own demons and summoning him to battle for this young girl’s soul and survival...

The Funniest Joke Book Ever!

The Funniest Joke Book Ever! PDF Author: Editors of Portable Press
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1626866139
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 90

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Book Description
Over 500 giggles, groans, and belly laughs! Kids can’t resist sharing jokes (even you try to stop them), so they always need a fresh supply. We’ve stuffed the pages of this little joke book with the funniest jokes we could find. Old favorites, new favorites, and a few festering stinkers, all guaranteed to make kids laugh out loud. You’ll find Q&A jokes, knock-knock jokes, riddles, and one-liners. And, of course, we’ve included entire chapters of those all-time kid-pleasers: elephant jokes, pirate jokes, and space jokes. Here’s a sampling: What's black and white, black and white, black and white? A penguin rolling down a hill. Why don’t zombies eat clowns? They taste funny. Why did the hen scold her chicks? They were using fowl language. What kind of books do skunks read? Best-smellers! How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side. . . . and many more!

The Wheel of Osheim

The Wheel of Osheim PDF Author: Mark Lawrence
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 1101630957
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 432

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Book Description
From the international bestselling author of the Broken Empire Trilogy, the thrilling conclusion to the Red Queen’s War... All the horrors of Hell stand between Snorri ver Snagason and the rescue of his family, if indeed the dead can be rescued. For Jalan Kendeth, getting out alive and with Loki’s key is all that matters. Loki’s creation can open any lock, any door, and it may also be the key to Jalan’s fortune back in the living world. Jalan plans to return to the three w’s that have been the core of his idle and debauched life: wine, women, and wagering. Fate, however, has other plans, larger plans. The Wheel of Osheim is turning ever faster, and it will crack the world unless it’s stopped. When the end of all things looms, and there’s nowhere to run, even the worst coward must find new answers. Jalan and Snorri face many dangers, from the corpse hordes of the Dead King to the many mirrors of the Lady Blue, but in the end, fast or slow, the Wheel of Osheim always pulls you back. In the end, it’s win or die.