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Author: Oliver Gaspirtz
Publisher: Westhoff Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 114
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Book Description
Are you a self-righteous political correctness crusader? Looking for the next big thing to get all outraged over? Do you plan on being highly offended by this book? Remember, just because you find dead baby jokes insensitive and offensive doesn't mean you have the right to ruin the fun for everyone else. Think of it this way: Just because you have a nut allergy, you don't get to ruin the Peanuts movie for everyone else. These are just jokes. Terribly tasteless jokes. But just jokes nonetheless. You know, Freedom of Speech and what not. No actual babies were harmed during the making of this book. So don't get your politically correct panties in a knot. Relax, take a deep breath, and allow yourself to laugh. I won't tell anybody what a sick puppy you are. It'll be our little secret. It's ok to laugh at terrible jokes. Really. (More about that at the end of this book.) Gaspirtz
Author: Oliver Gaspirtz
Publisher: Westhoff Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 114
Get Book Here
Book Description
Are you a self-righteous political correctness crusader? Looking for the next big thing to get all outraged over? Do you plan on being highly offended by this book? Remember, just because you find dead baby jokes insensitive and offensive doesn't mean you have the right to ruin the fun for everyone else. Think of it this way: Just because you have a nut allergy, you don't get to ruin the Peanuts movie for everyone else. These are just jokes. Terribly tasteless jokes. But just jokes nonetheless. You know, Freedom of Speech and what not. No actual babies were harmed during the making of this book. So don't get your politically correct panties in a knot. Relax, take a deep breath, and allow yourself to laugh. I won't tell anybody what a sick puppy you are. It'll be our little secret. It's ok to laugh at terrible jokes. Really. (More about that at the end of this book.) Gaspirtz
Author: Unearthed Books
Publisher: Createspace Independent Pub
ISBN: 9781478313014
Category : Cooking
Languages : en
Pages : 178
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Book Description
THE ULTIMATE DEAD BABY COOKBOOK is filled to the gills with all new recipes for 2012 and 2013! Appetizers, Blended Drinks, Breakfast Dishes, Lunch, Entrees and Desserts! With recipes from all over the globe, reaching far off countries like Vietnam and China to our back yard of Britain, Scotland and Ireland! It tells you everything you ever needed to know; to cook and serve a dead baby to your friends and family! Actual recipes, you can really use, even if you?re out of dead baby. Just pick a different meat like puppy or kitten to substitute and viola! Your friends and family will be thrilled to know, you're cooking for them using... The Ultimate Dead Baby Cookbook! Let Master Chef: Stephanzoe Orib of the infamous Flower of Flesh and Blood Restaurant in Okinawa Japan, take you on a dead baby, tasting thrill ride of different dead baby cuisine from around the world! The only thing, Master Chef Orib refuses to do, is show you his techniques of sashimi and sushi, using dead and sometimes live, babies. For that, you must visit The Flower of Flesh and Blood in Okinawa, Japan! I guarantee you, the best this world has to offer in fresh succulent baby eating. Everything you ever wondered and needed to know about Dead Babies is answered in this book. This is is the cookbook you need. This is... The Ultimate Dead Baby Cookbook! AWARDS and CONSTESTS WON: Chef of the Year Award: Bangkok Puppy Recipes 2012: Best Use Of Snout And Tales Cat Recipes: Achievement Award: Second Place Hong Kong: Up And Comer Award: Baby and Puppy Division Taiwanese Soup Finally: Best Use Of Garlic, Baby Lotion And Stale Children Award: 1st place Ireland: Worst Use Of Dead Babies and Potatoes: 1st place Great Britain: Worst Use Of Dead Babies in Shepard's Pie: Last Place Great Britain National Cook Off: Best Use of Dead Baby In Kidney Pie: First Place Texas International Chili Cook Off: 3rd Place, For Most Inventive Chili Tokyo's Tasty Fleshy Happy Time Award: 2nd place Matsuda's Funky Tasty Spitty Chewy Award: 1st place Dead Baby Quarterly: Master Chef Award For All Time Greatness
Author: Simon J. Bronner
Publisher: august house
ISBN: 9780874830682
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 288
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Book Description
Front cover: A book of rhymes, games, jokes, stories, secret languages, beliefs and camp legends, for parents, grandparents, teachers, counselors and all adults who were once children.
Author: Jeff Strand
Publisher: Red Room Press
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 316
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Book Description
"Not for the faint of heart or weak of stomach, the 19 stories in this new best-of annual anthology feature episodes of graphic gore and violence—including torture, dismemberment, self-mutilation, and home abortion—that are designed to push buttons as well as boundaries...strictly for hardcore horror fans."—Publishers Weekly Excerpt from the Introduction: Editors Randy Chandler and Cheryl Mullenax put the call out to horror writers and editors of extreme stories, the hardcore stuff that breaks boundaries and trashes taboos, the transgressive tales you can't "unread" (as Chuck Palahniuk says). We staked out our territory and nailed this to the wall to guide us: YEAR'S BEST HARDEST HORROR Not your mama's best-of horror annual. This stuff comes from the edge of the abyss, stories you read at your own risk because you feel the abyss looking right back into you through the tainted lens of each twisted tale. Some of the stories you'll find here are loaded with very graphic descriptions of violence, sex and depravities, while others may contain only one shocking moment of brutality. In others, the hardcore aspect may be less graphic and subtler than you might expect. Some of these quieter tales offer the reader some time to recover from the more disturbing ones preceding. Most of the stories collected here are from small and specialty press anthologies, with a few from periodicals, like the prestigious Splatterpunk Zine in the UK and Thuglit here in the US. Bizarro is also represented with a couple of tales from the unlikely anthology Blood For You: A Literary Tribute To GG Allin from Weirdpunk Books. (If you're not familiar with the late GG Allin, you can find snippets from some of his outrageous and obscene punk shows online, which will increase your appreciation of those two tales.) So for now, forget about that neighbor you suspect is a serial killer, don't worry about the drunk driver that could take you out on your next trip to the store, push those troubling news stories to the back of your mind and immerse yourself in the imaginary horrors at hand. But don't be surprised if you sense something dark staring back at you from between the lines. That is to be expected when you enter these forbidding realms. With any luck, you may find something useful to help you survive the approaching Apocalypse. TABLE OF CONTENTS Introduction: The Year That Was "Worth the Having" by Michael Paul Gonzalez "Awakening" by Jeff Strand "Readings Off The Charts" by Adam Cesare "Reborn" by The Behrg "What's Worst" by David James Keaton "Dead End" by Kristopher Triana "What You Wish For" by Lilith Morgan "King Shits" by Charles Austin Muir "Cleanup On Aisle 3" by Adam Howe "Bath Salt Fetus" by Jorge Palacios "Bored With Brutality" by MP Johnson "Exposed" by Monica J. O'Rourke "Eleanor" by Jason Parent "The Scavengers" by Tony Knighton "The Most Important Miracle" by Scott Emerson "Hungry For Control" by Clare de Lune "Clarissa" by Robert Essig & Jack Bantry "Where The Sun Don't Shine" by Pete Kahle "Blackbird Lullaby" by George Cotronis
Author: Colleen Hoover
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
ISBN: 153872474X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 295
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Book Description
Whose truth is the lie? Stay up all night reading the sensational psychological thriller that has readers obsessed, from the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Too Late and It Ends With Us. #1 New York Times Bestseller · USA Today Bestseller · Globe and Mail Bestseller · Publishers Weekly Bestseller Lowen Ashleigh is a struggling writer on the brink of financial ruin when she accepts the job offer of a lifetime. Jeremy Crawford, husband of bestselling author Verity Crawford, has hired Lowen to complete the remaining books in a successful series his injured wife is unable to finish. Lowen arrives at the Crawford home, ready to sort through years of Verity’s notes and outlines, hoping to find enough material to get her started. What Lowen doesn’t expect to uncover in the chaotic office is an unfinished autobiography Verity never intended for anyone to read. Page after page of bone-chilling admissions, including Verity's recollection of the night her family was forever altered. Lowen decides to keep the manuscript hidden from Jeremy, knowing its contents could devastate the already grieving father. But as Lowen’s feelings for Jeremy begin to intensify, she recognizes all the ways she could benefit if he were to read his wife’s words. After all, no matter how devoted Jeremy is to his injured wife, a truth this horrifying would make it impossible for him to continue loving her.
Author: Alice Munro
Publisher: Vintage
ISBN: 0307961044
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 336
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Book Description
WINNER OF THE NOBEL PRIZE© IN LITERATURE 2013 A New York Times Notable Book A Washington Post Notable Work of Fiction A Best Book of the Year: The Atlantic, NPR, San Francisco Chronicle, Vogue, AV Club In story after story in this brilliant new collection, Alice Munro pinpoints the moment a person is forever altered by a chance encounter, an action not taken, or a simple twist of fate. Her characters are flawed and fully human: a soldier returning from war and avoiding his fiancée, a wealthy woman deciding whether to confront a blackmailer, an adulterous mother and her neglected children, a guilt-ridden father, a young teacher jilted by her employer. Illumined by Munro’s unflinching insight, these lives draw us in with their quiet depth and surprise us with unexpected turns. And while most are set in her signature territory around Lake Huron, some strike even closer to home: an astonishing suite of four autobiographical tales offers an unprecedented glimpse into Munro’s own childhood. Exalted by her clarity of vision and her unparalleled gift for storytelling, Dear Life shows how strange, perilous, and extraordinary ordinary life can be.
Author: David Foster Wallace
Publisher: Back Bay Books
ISBN: 0316090522
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 549
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Book Description
These widely acclaimed essays from the author of Infinite Jest -- on television, tennis, cruise ships, and more -- established David Foster Wallace as one of the preeminent essayists of his generation. In this exuberantly praised book -- a collection of seven pieces on subjects ranging from television to tennis, from the Illinois State Fair to the films of David Lynch, from postmodern literary theory to the supposed fun of traveling aboard a Caribbean luxury cruiseliner -- David Foster Wallace brings to nonfiction the same curiosity, hilarity, and exhilarating verbal facility that has delighted readers of his fiction, including the bestselling Infinite Jest.
Author: Avery Monsen
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 145213538X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 96
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Book Description
If you're a dinosaur, all of your friends are dead. If you're a pirate, all of your friends have scurvy. If you're a tree, all of your friends are end tables. Each page of this laugh-out-loud illustrated humor book showcases the downside of being everything from a clown to a cassette tape to a zombie. Cute and dark all at once, this hilarious children's book for adults teaches valuable lessons about life while exploring each cartoon character's unique grievance and wide-eyed predicament. From the sock whose only friends have gone missing to the houseplant whose friends are being slowly killed by irresponsible plant owners (like you), All My Friends Are Dead presents a delightful primer for laughing at the inevitable.
Author: Hanya Yanagihara
Publisher: Vintage
ISBN: 0804172706
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 833
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Book Description
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A stunning “portrait of the enduring grace of friendship” (NPR) about the families we are born into, and those that we make for ourselves. A masterful depiction of love in the twenty-first century. NATIONAL BOOK AWARD FINALIST • MAN BOOKER PRIZE FINALIST • WINNER OF THE KIRKUS PRIZE A Little Life follows four college classmates—broke, adrift, and buoyed only by their friendship and ambition—as they move to New York in search of fame and fortune. While their relationships, which are tinged by addiction, success, and pride, deepen over the decades, the men are held together by their devotion to the brilliant, enigmatic Jude, a man scarred by an unspeakable childhood trauma. A hymn to brotherly bonds and a masterful depiction of love in the twenty-first century, Hanya Yanagihara’s stunning novel is about the families we are born into, and those that we make for ourselves. Look for Hanya Yanagihara’s latest bestselling novel, To Paradise.
Author:
Publisher: Ulysses Press
ISBN: 1569757097
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 146
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Book Description
A treasury of irreverent, politically incorrect, and wholly distasteful jokes represents top-selected submissions to the b3ta.com Web site, in a volume that is complemented by equally biting illustrations. Original.
