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Author: Oliver Gaspirtz
Publisher: Westhoff Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 114
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Book Description
Are you a self-righteous political correctness crusader? Looking for the next big thing to get all outraged over? Do you plan on being highly offended by this book? Remember, just because you find dead baby jokes insensitive and offensive doesn't mean you have the right to ruin the fun for everyone else. Think of it this way: Just because you have a nut allergy, you don't get to ruin the Peanuts movie for everyone else. These are just jokes. Terribly tasteless jokes. But just jokes nonetheless. You know, Freedom of Speech and what not. No actual babies were harmed during the making of this book. So don't get your politically correct panties in a knot. Relax, take a deep breath, and allow yourself to laugh. I won't tell anybody what a sick puppy you are. It'll be our little secret. It's ok to laugh at terrible jokes. Really. (More about that at the end of this book.) Gaspirtz
Author: Oliver Gaspirtz
Publisher: Westhoff Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 114
Get Book Here
Book Description
Are you a self-righteous political correctness crusader? Looking for the next big thing to get all outraged over? Do you plan on being highly offended by this book? Remember, just because you find dead baby jokes insensitive and offensive doesn't mean you have the right to ruin the fun for everyone else. Think of it this way: Just because you have a nut allergy, you don't get to ruin the Peanuts movie for everyone else. These are just jokes. Terribly tasteless jokes. But just jokes nonetheless. You know, Freedom of Speech and what not. No actual babies were harmed during the making of this book. So don't get your politically correct panties in a knot. Relax, take a deep breath, and allow yourself to laugh. I won't tell anybody what a sick puppy you are. It'll be our little secret. It's ok to laugh at terrible jokes. Really. (More about that at the end of this book.) Gaspirtz
Author: Unearthed Books
Publisher: Createspace Independent Pub
ISBN: 9781478313014
Category : Cooking
Languages : en
Pages : 178
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Book Description
THE ULTIMATE DEAD BABY COOKBOOK is filled to the gills with all new recipes for 2012 and 2013! Appetizers, Blended Drinks, Breakfast Dishes, Lunch, Entrees and Desserts! With recipes from all over the globe, reaching far off countries like Vietnam and China to our back yard of Britain, Scotland and Ireland! It tells you everything you ever needed to know; to cook and serve a dead baby to your friends and family! Actual recipes, you can really use, even if you?re out of dead baby. Just pick a different meat like puppy or kitten to substitute and viola! Your friends and family will be thrilled to know, you're cooking for them using... The Ultimate Dead Baby Cookbook! Let Master Chef: Stephanzoe Orib of the infamous Flower of Flesh and Blood Restaurant in Okinawa Japan, take you on a dead baby, tasting thrill ride of different dead baby cuisine from around the world! The only thing, Master Chef Orib refuses to do, is show you his techniques of sashimi and sushi, using dead and sometimes live, babies. For that, you must visit The Flower of Flesh and Blood in Okinawa, Japan! I guarantee you, the best this world has to offer in fresh succulent baby eating. Everything you ever wondered and needed to know about Dead Babies is answered in this book. This is is the cookbook you need. This is... The Ultimate Dead Baby Cookbook! AWARDS and CONSTESTS WON: Chef of the Year Award: Bangkok Puppy Recipes 2012: Best Use Of Snout And Tales Cat Recipes: Achievement Award: Second Place Hong Kong: Up And Comer Award: Baby and Puppy Division Taiwanese Soup Finally: Best Use Of Garlic, Baby Lotion And Stale Children Award: 1st place Ireland: Worst Use Of Dead Babies and Potatoes: 1st place Great Britain: Worst Use Of Dead Babies in Shepard's Pie: Last Place Great Britain National Cook Off: Best Use of Dead Baby In Kidney Pie: First Place Texas International Chili Cook Off: 3rd Place, For Most Inventive Chili Tokyo's Tasty Fleshy Happy Time Award: 2nd place Matsuda's Funky Tasty Spitty Chewy Award: 1st place Dead Baby Quarterly: Master Chef Award For All Time Greatness
Author: Johnny Quest
Publisher: No Pledge Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Political Science
Languages : en
Pages : 340
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Book Description
Adolf Hitler was a socialist. Most of what is written about Hitler is deceitfully designed to hide the fact that he touted “socialism” by the very word. Consider the following revelations explained herein (with special thanks to archives of Dr. Rex Curry’s work): 1. Hitler called himself a “Socialist.” The word "Socialist" appears throughout Mein Kampf as a self-description by Hitler. Hitler and his supporters self-identified as “socialists” by the very term in voluminous speeches and writings. 2. Hitler never called himself a "Nazi." There was no “Nazi Party” nor “Nazi Germany” as those are lies to hide the true names of the entities. 3. Hitler never called himself a “Fascist.” 4. The term “Nazi” isn’t in "Mein Kampf" nor in "Triumph of the Will." 5. The term “Fascist” never appears in Mein Kampf as a self-description by Hitler. 6. The term “swastika” never appears in the original Mein Kampf. 7. There is no evidence that Hitler ever used the word “swastika.” 8. The symbol that Hitler did use was intended to represent “S”-letter shapes for “socialist.” 9. Hitler altered his own signature to reflect his “S-shapes for socialism” logo branding. 10. Hitler was influenced by American socialists - the USA's Pledge of Allegiance to the flag was the origin of Nazi salutes and Nazi behavior. 11. The classic military salute (to the brow) also contributed to the creation of the Nazi salute (with the right-arm extended stiffly). 12. Mussolini was a long-time socialist leader, with a socialist background, raised by socialists to be a socialist, and he joined socialists known as “fascio, fasci, and fascisti.” 13. Fascism came from a socialist (e.g. Mussolini). Communism came from a socialist (e.g. Marx). Fascism and Communism came from socialists. 14. German socialists partnered with Soviet socialists to launch WWII, invading Poland together, and going onward from there, killing millions. Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Mao, and other tyrants were influenced by propaganda in the USA, including the childish American socialists Francis Bellamy and Edward Bellamy. Both Bellamy cousins wanted government to take over all schools, to teach socialism to all youngsters worldwide. Francis Bellamy was the author of the Pledge of Allegiance to the flag, the origin of the infamous stiff-armed salute adopted later under German socialism and Adolf Hitler. Long before the Deutschland fad began, American schoolchildren were taught to chant in unison and perform the same salute each day in government schools that imposed segregation by law and taught racism as official policy. Anyone who rejected the ritual in the schools was persecuted. “America’s Nazi salute” was often performed by public officials in the USA from 1892 through 1942. What happened to old photographs and films of the American Nazi salute performed by federal, state, county, and local officials? Those photos and films are rare because people don't want to know the truth about the government’s past. TV, newspapers and other MSM will not show a historic photo or video of the early American straight-arm salute nor mention its history and impact worldwide. American youth groups (Scouting) adopted Bellamy's American Nazi salute (with Bellamy’s encouragement) AND saluted swastika badges (卐) worn by fellow scouts. Many Americans were accustomed to “Nazi salutes for swastikas” long before German socialism (and Hitler Youth) adopted similar behavior under Hitler. That helps to explain another inconvenient truth: swastikas were promoted in the US military and worn as a patch on the upper left arm of American soldiers in a fashion that would become uniform under German socialism. There are photos in this book! The military salute was the origin of Nazi salutes, via the USA's flag pledge in government schools. Public officials in the USA who preceded the German socialist (Hitler) and the Italian socialist (Mussolini) were sources for the stiff-armed salute (and brainwashed chanting) in Germany, Italy, and other foreign countries.
Author: Jeff Strand
Publisher: Red Room Press
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 316
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Book Description
"Not for the faint of heart or weak of stomach, the 19 stories in this new best-of annual anthology feature episodes of graphic gore and violence—including torture, dismemberment, self-mutilation, and home abortion—that are designed to push buttons as well as boundaries...strictly for hardcore horror fans."—Publishers Weekly Excerpt from the Introduction: Editors Randy Chandler and Cheryl Mullenax put the call out to horror writers and editors of extreme stories, the hardcore stuff that breaks boundaries and trashes taboos, the transgressive tales you can't "unread" (as Chuck Palahniuk says). We staked out our territory and nailed this to the wall to guide us: YEAR'S BEST HARDEST HORROR Not your mama's best-of horror annual. This stuff comes from the edge of the abyss, stories you read at your own risk because you feel the abyss looking right back into you through the tainted lens of each twisted tale. Some of the stories you'll find here are loaded with very graphic descriptions of violence, sex and depravities, while others may contain only one shocking moment of brutality. In others, the hardcore aspect may be less graphic and subtler than you might expect. Some of these quieter tales offer the reader some time to recover from the more disturbing ones preceding. Most of the stories collected here are from small and specialty press anthologies, with a few from periodicals, like the prestigious Splatterpunk Zine in the UK and Thuglit here in the US. Bizarro is also represented with a couple of tales from the unlikely anthology Blood For You: A Literary Tribute To GG Allin from Weirdpunk Books. (If you're not familiar with the late GG Allin, you can find snippets from some of his outrageous and obscene punk shows online, which will increase your appreciation of those two tales.) So for now, forget about that neighbor you suspect is a serial killer, don't worry about the drunk driver that could take you out on your next trip to the store, push those troubling news stories to the back of your mind and immerse yourself in the imaginary horrors at hand. But don't be surprised if you sense something dark staring back at you from between the lines. That is to be expected when you enter these forbidding realms. With any luck, you may find something useful to help you survive the approaching Apocalypse. TABLE OF CONTENTS Introduction: The Year That Was "Worth the Having" by Michael Paul Gonzalez "Awakening" by Jeff Strand "Readings Off The Charts" by Adam Cesare "Reborn" by The Behrg "What's Worst" by David James Keaton "Dead End" by Kristopher Triana "What You Wish For" by Lilith Morgan "King Shits" by Charles Austin Muir "Cleanup On Aisle 3" by Adam Howe "Bath Salt Fetus" by Jorge Palacios "Bored With Brutality" by MP Johnson "Exposed" by Monica J. O'Rourke "Eleanor" by Jason Parent "The Scavengers" by Tony Knighton "The Most Important Miracle" by Scott Emerson "Hungry For Control" by Clare de Lune "Clarissa" by Robert Essig & Jack Bantry "Where The Sun Don't Shine" by Pete Kahle "Blackbird Lullaby" by George Cotronis
Author: Micky Barnetti
Publisher: No Pledge Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Political Science
Languages : en
Pages : 352
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Book Description
Karl Marx and Adolph Hitler are always trending on the internet. Their ideas are adored and repeated incessantly on social media and by the mainstream media (MSM). Their books were once considered too dangerous for the general public. But Mein Kampf was a bestseller as recently as 2017. Its popularity grows worldwide. It has always been one of Amazon’s better-selling book titles. Web searches reveal the embarrassing 2018 video “Chinese President Xi Jinping delivers speech on anniversary of Marx’s birth.” In it, Xi openly drooled over the western male racist socialist. China is led around by its nose tied to the same old German who influenced Hitler. Is there any other country of that size that openly worships a foreigner as their great white savior? Marx’s larger-than-life posters are often paired with the outdated hammer and sickle symbol that China parroted from Soviet socialism. How embarrassing. America’s love affair with German philosophy stretches back to the mid-1800s, and farther. Many Americans struggle to bring Germany’s past into the present at every election. MSM polling reports that 70 percent of millennials say they would vote for a candidate who self-identifies the same as Hitler (2019 YouGov poll). Two politicians in the USA (Alexanderia Ocasio Cortez -AOC- & Bernie Sanders -BS) boastfully self-identify the same as Hitler: SOCIALIST. Other politicians gladly adopt and repeat the same ideas even if they are too dishonest to admit that they are socialist. According to another report, 60 percent of Millennials (age 24-39) support a “complete change of our economic system.” Marx and Hitler were both anti-bourgeois and advocated revolution. Many Americans long for the same revolutions. The ideas of the beloved Deutschland duo continue to grow in popularity. Germany’s two top white male racist political philosophers stay in vogue even though their policies remain a mystery. For example, the following facts (with credit to the archives of the historian Dr. Rex Curry) will come as news to most readers: 1. Hitler and Marx were popular in the USA. Two famous American socialists (the cousins Edward Bellamy and Francis Bellamy) were heavily influenced by Marx. The American socialists returned the favor: Francis Bellamy created the “Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag” that was the origin of Nazi salutes and Nazi behavior. The Bellamys were American national socialists. For more on that advance to chapter 6 on “Bellamy salutes.” 2. The classic military salute (to the brow) also contributed to the creation of the Nazi salute (with the right-arm extended stiffly). 3. The Bellamy cousins promoted socialist schools that imposed segregation by law and taught racism as official policy. 4. Hitler and his supporters self-identified as “socialists” by the very word in voluminous speeches and writings. The term "Socialist" appears throughout Mein Kampf as a self-description by Hitler. 5. Hitler never called himself a "Nazi." There was no “Nazi Germany.” There was no “Nazi Party.” Those terms are slang to hide how Hitler and his comrades self-identified: SOCIALIST. 6. Hitler never called himself a “Fascist.” That term is misused to hide how Hitler and his comrades self-identified: SOCIALIST. 7. The term “Nazi” isn’t in "Mein Kampf" nor in "Triumph of the Will." 8. The term “Fascist” never appears in Mein Kampf as a self-description by Hitler. 9. The term “swastika” never appears in the original Mein Kampf. 10. There is no evidence that Hitler ever used the word “swastika.” 11. The symbol that Hitler did use was intended to represent “S”-letter shapes for “socialist.” 12. Hitler altered his own signature to reflect his “S-shapes for socialism” logo branding. 13. Mussolini was a long-time socialist leader, with a socialist background, raised by socialists to be a socialist, and he joined socialists known as “fascio, fasci, and fascisti.” 14. Fascism came from a socialist (e.g. Mussolini). Communism came from a socialist (e.g. Marx). Fascism and Communism came from socialists. 15. German socialists and Soviet socialists partnered for International Socialism in 1939. They launched WWII, invading Poland together, and continued onward from there, killing millions. Soviet socialism had signed on for Hitler’s Holocaust. 16. After Hitler’s death, Stalin continued the plan he had made with Hitler for Global Socialism. Stalin took over the same areas that Hitler had captured. He used the same facilities that Hitler had used. Hitler’s Holocaust never ended. Stalin replaced Hitler. Hitler, Stalin, Mao, Mussolini, and other tyrants were influenced by propaganda in the USA, including the childish American socialists Francis Bellamy and Edward Bellamy. Both Bellamy cousins wanted government to take over all schools, to teach socialism to all youngsters worldwide. Francis Bellamy was the author of the Pledge of Allegiance to the flag, the origin of the infamous stiff-armed salute adopted later under German socialism and Adolf Hitler. Long before the Deutschland fad began, American schoolchildren were taught to chant in unison and perform the same salute each day in government schools that imposed segregation by law and taught racism as official policy. Anyone who rejected the ritual in the schools was persecuted. “America’s Nazi salute” was often performed by public officials in the USA from 1892 through 1942. What happened to old photographs and films of the American Nazi salute performed by federal, state, county, and local officials? Those photos and films are rare because people don't want to know the truth about the government’s past. TV, newspapers and other MSM will not show a historic photo or video of the early American straight-arm salute nor mention its history and impact worldwide. American youth groups (Scouting) adopted Bellamy's American Nazi salute (with Bellamy’s encouragement) AND saluted swastika badges (卐) worn by fellow scouts. Many Americans were accustomed to “Nazi salutes for swastikas” long before German socialism (and Hitler Youth) adopted similar behavior under Hitler. That helps to explain another inconvenient truth: swastikas were promoted in the US military and worn as a patch on the upper left arm of American soldiers in a fashion that would become uniform under German socialism. There are extremely rare photographs in this book!
Author: Simon J. Bronner
Publisher: august house
ISBN: 9780874830682
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 288
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Book Description
Front cover: A book of rhymes, games, jokes, stories, secret languages, beliefs and camp legends, for parents, grandparents, teachers, counselors and all adults who were once children.
Author: Scott McNeely
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 1452113157
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 348
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Book Description
Whether you re making a toast at a wedding, trying to break the ice at a party, or just want to make your boss giggle, the Ultimate Book of Jokes is the first and last resource you'll ever need. From road-crossing chickens and classic knock knock jokes to the naughty, nice, and totally soused, no subject goes unmocked in this collection of over 1,500 jokes, packaged in a deluxe embossed board cover with 2-color line art throughout. Scott McNeeley, author of Ultimate Book of Card Games, mined decades worth of jokes to find chuckle-inducing punch lines for joke lovers of all stripes from yo mamma aficionados to naughty limerick connoisseurs.
Author: Doug Stanhope
Publisher: Hachette+ORM
ISBN: 030682440X
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 352
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Book Description
Doug Stanhope is one of the most critically acclaimed and stridently unrepentant comedians of his generation. What will surprise some is that he owes so much of his dark and sometimes uncomfortably honest sense of humor to his mother, Bonnie. It was the cartoons in her Hustler magazine issues that molded the beginnings of his comedic journey, long before he was old enough to know what to do with the actual pornography. It was Bonnie who recited Monty Python sketches with him, who introduced him to Richard Pryor at nine years old, and who rescued him from a psychologist when he brought that brand of humor to school. And it was Bonnie who took him along to all of her AA meetings, where Doug undoubtedly found inspiration for his own storytelling. Bonnie's own path from bartending to truck driving, massage therapy, elder abuse, stand-up comedy, and acting never stopped her from being Doug's genuine number one fan. So when her alcoholic, hoarding life finally came to an end many weird adventures later in rural Arizona, it was inevitable that Doug and Bonnie would be together for one last excursion. Digging Up Mother follows Doug's absurd, chaotic, and often obscene life as it intersects with that of his best friend, biggest fan, and love of his life-his mother. And it all starts with her death-one of the most memorable and amazing farewells you will ever read.
Author: Michele C. Hollow
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1510706372
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 159
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Book Description
Jokes for Minecrafters: Booby Traps, Bombs, Boo-Boos, and More is the first book in the new Jokes for Minecrafters series, which celebrate the humor in Minecraft from skeleton mobs to zombie pigmen. Be prepared to laugh! No ghast or blaze is safe from being the punch line of these jokes! Inside you will find hilarious jokes like: Why did the slime stay home? He had no place to goo! How did Steve know that the skeleton was lying to him? He could see right through him. For kids ages 5 and up, this is the perfect book for at home, at school, or really anywhere! You’ll love telling these silly jokes to your friends and family! As a bonus, you’ll find illustrations throughout for even more laughs! Sky Pony Press, with our Good Books, Racehorse and Arcade imprints, is proud to publish a broad range of books for young readers—picture books for small children, chapter books, books for middle grade readers, and novels for young adults. Our list includes bestsellers for children who love stories told with LEGO bricks, books that teach lessons about tolerance, patience, and the environment, and much more. We also publish books for fans of Minecraft and Pokemon GO, including books full of useful hacks, tips, and tricks, as well as Minecraft adventure stories for readers who love the fight of good vs. evil, featuring a magical academy similar to Hogwarts in the Harry Potter saga. While not every title we publish becomes a New York Times bestseller or a national bestseller, we are committed to books on subjects that are sometimes overlooked and to authors whose work might not otherwise find a home.
Author: Norm Macdonald
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 0812993632
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 245
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Book Description
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • “Driving, wild and hilarious” (The Washington Post), here is the incredible “memoir” of the legendary actor, gambler, raconteur, and Saturday Night Live veteran. When Norm Macdonald, one of the greatest stand-up comics of all time, was approached to write a celebrity memoir, he flatly refused, calling the genre “one step below instruction manuals.” Norm then promptly took a two-year hiatus from stand-up comedy to live on a farm in northern Canada. When he emerged he had under his arm a manuscript, a genre-smashing book about comedy, tragedy, love, loss, war, and redemption. When asked if this was the celebrity memoir, Norm replied, “Call it anything you damn like.”
