Like a Festering Ingrown Toenail--Where’s My Side of Toe Cheese? PDF Download
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Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1533737649
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 23
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Book Description
Earl Muggs wanted a wife. Instead, he got the devil, or close to it. His witch of a wife Helga doesn’t cook, doesn’t clean, and certainly doesn’t polish yours truly. Gagnabbit! So what’s a man to do? Get revenge, that’s what! And mental midget Muggs knows just how… Approximately 1,200 words. WARNING: Contains toe cheese.
Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1533737649
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 23
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Book Description
Earl Muggs wanted a wife. Instead, he got the devil, or close to it. His witch of a wife Helga doesn’t cook, doesn’t clean, and certainly doesn’t polish yours truly. Gagnabbit! So what’s a man to do? Get revenge, that’s what! And mental midget Muggs knows just how… Approximately 1,200 words. WARNING: Contains toe cheese.
Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1624544983
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 60
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Book Description
Think you know everything there is to know about mankind's favorite green gas? Well, Donald Rump has something in store for you! Inside, you'll finally get to the bottom of many age-old questions, including: - Where do farts come from? - Are farts people? - Do farts die? - Do all farts go to heaven? - What should I do if a zombie farts on me? - Does inhaling farts cause brain damage? - What if someone steals my farts? - Can farts be used to power my car? - I've run out of farts. Should I dial 911? - Should I join Fartaholics Anonymous? And many, many more! So what are you waiting for? Become a fart expert today! Approximately 11,500 words in all. Intended for readers 15 and up.
Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1624545181
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 20
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Book Description
Helen Hubbard's fears have finally been confirmed. During brunch one morning in her favorite restaurant, her husband Gary confesses to cheating on her, and is ready to leave at a moment's notice. When she pries deeper into the matter, she discovers more about his mysterious lover Muffy than she cares to know. “So you’re leaving me for a fart???” Helen exclaimed. For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,500 words.
Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1624544835
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 26
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Book Description
Zack Pimpton's ass never felt worse, and it doesn't help that his doctor is a part time comedian. Unfortunately, Zack is quite the bastard himself and accidentally says the wrong thing that causes the good, old doctor to snap. Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,300 words. EXCERPT FROM THE CHAPPED-ASS CRITIC “Doc, you’ve got to help me,” a thin, wiry man named Zack Pimpton bent over the padded table and rubbed his behind. “My ass hurts really, really bad. I think I might have broken it.” A bead of sweat trickled down his forehead. “How did this happen?” Dr. Marsh asked. “I don't know. I was typing up a review when suddenly my butt began to hurt. At first it stung just a little. I tried ignoring it, but it got worse and worse until I eventually found myself here. It's terrible! I can’t believe I was able to drive over here.” He tried sitting and recoiled immediately. “Well, you're in luck! It's nothing life-threatening, that’s for sure, but I'm afraid you won’t have use of your buttocks again,” the portly doctor cracked a smile.
Author: Paul Brand
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
ISBN: 9780060925529
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 356
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Book Description
Inspirational cassette on the dramatic career of Paul Brand, a famous surgeon
Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1624544827
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 30
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Book Description
Could the greatest power… The path to riches beyond our wildest imagination… The key to reaching the highest level of spiritual awareness and happiness… …be obtained by bottling farts??? "Shh…it's our secret…" Vlad told the little boy. "Use the power wisely…" Approximately 2,200 words.
Author: Jerzy Kosinski
Publisher: Transaction Large Print
ISBN: 9780765806550
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 260
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Book Description
Winner of the National Book Award The Painted Bird is one of the most shocking indictments of Nazi madness and terrors of the Holocaust during World War II. It is a story about the proximity of terror and savagery to innocence and love. It is a vivid and graphic portrayal of the hellish Nazi occupation of Eastern Europe as seen through the eyes of a boy struggling for survival, an alien child lost in a world gone mad.
Author: Martin Lindstrom
Publisher: Currency
ISBN: 0385523890
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 274
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Book Description
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • “A fascinating look at how consumers perceive logos, ads, commercials, brands, and products.”—Time How much do we know about why we buy? What truly influences our decisions in today’s message-cluttered world? In Buyology, Martin Lindstrom presents the astonishing findings from his groundbreaking three-year, seven-million-dollar neuromarketing study—a cutting-edge experiment that peered inside the brains of 2,000 volunteers from all around the world as they encountered various ads, logos, commercials, brands, and products. His startling results shatter much of what we have long believed about what captures our interest—and drives us to buy. Among the questions he explores: • Does sex actually sell? • Does subliminal advertising still surround us? • Can “cool” brands trigger our mating instincts? • Can our other senses—smell, touch, and sound—be aroused when we see a product? Buyology is a fascinating and shocking journey into the mind of today's consumer that will captivate anyone who's been seduced—or turned off—by marketers' relentless attempts to win our loyalty, our money, and our minds.
Author: Willam Belli
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
ISBN: 1455566217
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 469
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Book Description
The only lie told more often than "No, that looks totally cute on you" and "I got AIDS through oral" is "It gets better." Well, a lotta times it don't. Sometimes it just sucks less. But I promise you: where there's a Willam, there's a way. But this isn't all about me (for once). It's about you and how you can Suck Less at a variety of things drag queens are so much better at than the average person. I've got clap backs and life hacks and tips on classing up a simple grab-and-run lifting spree to the much more dignified act of larceny. Super-important life stuff with my own special, secret fag- swag sauce. So welcome to Willam's School of Bitchcraft and Wiggotry. Class is in session. With a foreword from Neil Patrick Harris.
Author: Bloomsbury Publishing
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
ISBN: 1408102579
Category : Games & Activities
Languages : en
Pages : 719
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Book Description
Anagram Solver is the essential guide to cracking all types of quiz and crossword featuring anagrams. Containing over 200,000 words and phrases, Anagram Solver includes plural noun forms, palindromes, idioms, first names and all parts of speech. Anagrams are grouped by the number of letters they contain with the letters set out in alphabetical order so that once the letters of an anagram are arranged alphabetically, finding the solution is as easy as locating the word in a dictionary.
