Author: Matthew Gasteier
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 0345527658
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 242
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Book Description
Perfect for the Scrooge in your life—a profane, hilarious takedown of all things cute and cuddly, by the author of the blog sensation of (almost) the same name Attention, all you clumsy pandas, lovable puffins, huggable bunnies, and penguins that elicit ooohs and aaahs: The jig is up! We have lived under your furry fists for too long. There is a cute and present danger lurking out there–in the wild, in the zoos, and sometimes even in our very own homes. Spurred on by the Cute Industrial Complex, these cuddly animals have taken over blockbuster films, inspirational posters, and computer desktops everywhere, further weakening the innocent civilians who are beguiled by these fuzzy frauds. But you are stronger than them, aren’t you? Those soft bellies and wet noses are no match for you–and their free ride has just come to an end. F U, Penguin is the rallying cry for those who choose to fight these power-hungry cute-mongers. Loaded with color photographs and hilarious commentary, this book will have you laughing out loud while it simultaneously saves you from the tragic fate of tossing yarn with big-eyed kittens and bottle-nursing baby pandas forever. ___________________________ "Finally, a book for the rest of us! Most animals go about our business without playing to the audience like the elitists exposed in these chapters.I wasn't sure how many more times I could hear about those great penguins and pandas and kittens before I started eating people... well, more people, anyway."—Jerry the Shark "Penguins killed my parents, and they would not hesitate to kill me. I thank the Crustacean God for Matthew Gasteier, a true saint and a decent human being in a world filled with heartless penguin accomplices."—Dennis the Krill "It's all true. We're the worst."—Anonymous Penguin "The average dolphin is far beyond this level of vulgarity, but I could see how this would be a very enjoyable book for humans. I should remember to hand these out to some of my slower relatives at the common ancestor reunion."—Edward the Dolphin "Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, this style of book is not something we are currently looking for. However, we wish you the best of luck with your human publishers!"—Danielle the Bear, Editor-in-Chief, Random Cave Publishing
Author: Kimberly Maslin
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780646996806
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 50
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Book Description
The much anticipated sequel to "The Tweeting Galah" sees new and familiar faces return to outback Australia, as they explore and navigate their way through the digital world. Together, they overcome challenges and learn how to be the best versions of themselves online. Each story concludes with reflection questions and an augmented reality experience.
Author: Helen Lester
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt
ISBN: 0547347421
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 36
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Book Description
An offbeat penguin shows his peers the power of individuality in this humorous tale from the author of Pookins Gets Her Way. Tacky is an odd bird. He likes to do splashy cannonballs and greet his companions with a loud "What's happening?" In fact, he's something of an eccentric, which wouldn't be a problem if all the other penguins weren't such…conformists. When intimidating visitors invade their peaceful, nice, icy land, it'll take a lot more than a bunch of perfect penguins to save the day. Thank goodness Tacky's such an odd bird! “This book is must reading for any kid—or grown-up—who refuses to follow the pack.”—Publishers Weekly
Author: Lynne Rickards
Publisher: 'The Rosen Publishing Group, Inc'
ISBN: 1499486545
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 34
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Book Description
Pink! is a heartwarming story about learning to be different. Patrick wakes up one morning to find he’s turned pink overnight. But boys can’t be pink! Rejected by his friends, poor Patrick runs away in search of new pink playmates. He crosses oceans where he finds some pink flamingos, but will he ever fit in with them? Patrick soon learns that friendship is never black and white, but that real friends will accept you just as you are.
Author: Florence Minor
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0061130974
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 38
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Book Description
If you were a penguin . . . You could swim really fast and toboggan on ice. Sing a happy duet, once or twice. You could live on land but dive under the sea. There's a lot penguins can do, just like you and me! Wendell and Florence Minor create a charming tribute to all the playful fun and activity that comes with being a penguin—which young readers can delight in too!
Author: Leo Landry
Publisher: Charlesbridge
ISBN: 1607349140
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 50
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Book Description
A hilarious follow-up to Grin and Bear It, this early reader offers lessons on jealousy, self-confidence and the art of making new friends. Chuck Wood is upset. Jealous, too. Also insecure. As the winner of the Best of the Forest art contest three years in a row, he finds it very difficult to deal with the prospect that newcomer Scooter Possum’s abstract paintings might beat his wood sculptures. But with the help of his forest friends, Chuck deals with his hurt feelings and realizes that his love for creating art is greater than his need to win. When you follow your heart, everyone’s a winner.
Author: Cocoretto
Publisher: What's Up
ISBN: 9781786281548
Category : Animals
Languages : en
Pages : 0
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Book Description
What are the animals up to? There are lots of clues to help us decide, and we can lift the flap to see if we're right. A playful way to exercise reasoning, prediction and memory skills, featuring colourful, high-contrast illustrations.
Author: Richard Atwater
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 1453227865
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 113
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Book Description
Mr. Popper and his family have penguins in the fridge and an ice rink in the basement in this hilarious Newbery Honor book that inspired the hit movie! How many penguins in the house is too many? Mr. Popper is a humble house painter living in Stillwater who dreams of faraway places like the South Pole. When an explorer responds to his letter by sending him a penguin named Captain Cook, Mr. Popper and his family’s lives change forever. Soon one penguin becomes twelve, and the Poppers must set out on their own adventure to preserve their home. First published in 1938, Mr. Popper’s Penguins is a classic tale that has enchanted young readers for generations. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Richard and Florence Atwater including rare photos from the authors’ estate.
Author: Sarah Cullen (Author of children's books)
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780648849858
Category : Friendship
Languages : en
Pages :
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Book Description
"He only wants to fit in. How far will this penguin go to try to fit in? Spike the Penguin wishes he wasn't different. Even though his parents tell him his bright red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple mohawk is beautiful, he still wants to hide his head under his flippers. Determined to find a way to be like everyone else, the sad little guy sets out on an Antarctic adventure! Diving deep into the ocean to seek a solution, Spike tries out seashell hats, squid-ink dye jobs, and a seal hair salon. But when no one can make him look just right, he fears he'll never be happy... until his friends share something unexpected. Can this penguin learn to appreciate his perfectly awesome plumage? Spike, The Penguin With Rainbow Hair is a heartwarming children's picture book written in playful rhyme. If you or your child like cute animals, silly scenarios, and stories about accepting everyone just the way they are, then you'll love Sarah Cullen and Carmen Ellis's fun-filled escapade."--Amazon.com.
Author: Jory John
Publisher: Random House Studio
ISBN: 0553513370
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 34
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Book Description
Have you ever thought: I have so many problems and nobody even cares? Well, penguins have problems too! Discover them in this hilarious collaboration from Jory John (All my friends are dead. and Quit Calling Me a Monster!) and Lane Smith (The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales)! This penguin has come to tell you that life in Antarctica is no paradise. For starters, it is FREEZING. Also, penguins have a ton of natural predators. Plus, can you imagine trying to find your mom in a big ol’ crowd of identical penguins? No, thank you. Yes, it seems there is no escaping the drudgery of your daily grind, whatever it might be. Or perhaps we’ve just learned that grumps are everywhere. . . . This book is sure to tickle kids’ funny bones and will elicit appreciative sighs from the adults reading it aloud. "We are all Mortimer [the main character in Penguin Problems]." —The New York Times “Bursting with humor.” —Kirkus Reviews “The snark level is cranked up high.” —The Horn Book, Starred “Will be right at home with fans of Jon Klassen’s This Is Not My Hat.” —Booklist “Classic comedy.” —Publishers Weekly “Rib-tickling.” —School Library Journal
