Pundamentalist

Pundamentalist PDF Author: Gary Delaney
Publisher: Headline
ISBN: 1472277449
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 118

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Book Description
'For a collection of good old-fashioned gags, it's one of the best out there, a rich buffet of inventive wordplay that's best savoured a little at a time to fully appreciate the joy of these perfectly-constructed morsels. For original, hilarious gags you'll want to share, this is the real deal.' - Chortle 'A rollicking joyride. . . Pundamentalist has puns for the whole family: rude ones, daft ones, deft ones, stinkers and absolute belters.' - British Comedy Guide Gary Delaney, one-liner extraordinaire, has appeared on shows like Mock the Week and written for the likes of Jimmy Carr, Jason Manford, and James Corden. Now, for the first time, comes the first collection of his finest jokes. Featuring the likes of: Garden centres can't reopen fast enough for me, I've been living on borrowed thyme. We can't even afford a garden, so when my girlfriend bought us a trampoline I hit the roof. Sure everyone cares about straws killing dolphins now, but they've been breaking camels' backs for years. Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration, which explains why Prince Andrew is so stupid. Sad news: The British simile champion has died. We shall not see his like again. My mom doesn't trust my dad's secretary. I asked her why, and she just said 'I've seen her type before'. Today someone told me that I look good with a salt 'n' pepper beard, so I took that as a condiment. My French pen friend just said 'Le Monde', which means the world to me. Can anyone tell me what FOMO stands for? Everyone else seems to know. Actors have got Equity, Magicians have got the Magic Circle, but it's a shame ventriloquists don't have anyone to speak for them. Does anyone know if it's safe to dye your pubes? It's a bit of a grey area. And make sure you look out for Gary's next book, about Stockholm Syndrome: it starts off badly but by the end you'll really enjoy it . . .

Pundamentalist

Pundamentalist PDF Author: Gary Delaney
Publisher: Headline
ISBN: 1472277449
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 118

Get Book Here

Book Description
'For a collection of good old-fashioned gags, it's one of the best out there, a rich buffet of inventive wordplay that's best savoured a little at a time to fully appreciate the joy of these perfectly-constructed morsels. For original, hilarious gags you'll want to share, this is the real deal.' - Chortle 'A rollicking joyride. . . Pundamentalist has puns for the whole family: rude ones, daft ones, deft ones, stinkers and absolute belters.' - British Comedy Guide Gary Delaney, one-liner extraordinaire, has appeared on shows like Mock the Week and written for the likes of Jimmy Carr, Jason Manford, and James Corden. Now, for the first time, comes the first collection of his finest jokes. Featuring the likes of: Garden centres can't reopen fast enough for me, I've been living on borrowed thyme. We can't even afford a garden, so when my girlfriend bought us a trampoline I hit the roof. Sure everyone cares about straws killing dolphins now, but they've been breaking camels' backs for years. Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration, which explains why Prince Andrew is so stupid. Sad news: The British simile champion has died. We shall not see his like again. My mom doesn't trust my dad's secretary. I asked her why, and she just said 'I've seen her type before'. Today someone told me that I look good with a salt 'n' pepper beard, so I took that as a condiment. My French pen friend just said 'Le Monde', which means the world to me. Can anyone tell me what FOMO stands for? Everyone else seems to know. Actors have got Equity, Magicians have got the Magic Circle, but it's a shame ventriloquists don't have anyone to speak for them. Does anyone know if it's safe to dye your pubes? It's a bit of a grey area. And make sure you look out for Gary's next book, about Stockholm Syndrome: it starts off badly but by the end you'll really enjoy it . . .

Pundamentalist

Pundamentalist PDF Author: Gary Delaney
Publisher: Headline
ISBN: 9781472277459
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 224

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Book Description
'For a collection of good old-fashioned gags, it's one of the best out there, a rich buffet of inventive wordplay that's best savoured a little at a time to fully appreciate the joy of these perfectly-constructed morsels. For original, hilarious gags you'll want to share, this is the real deal.' - Chortle 'A rollicking joyride. . . Pundamentalist has puns for the whole family: rude ones, daft ones, deft ones, stinkers and absolute belters.' - British Comedy Guide Gary Delaney, one-liner extraordinaire, has appeared on shows like Mock the Week and written for the likes of Jimmy Carr, Jason Manford, and James Corden. Now, for the first time, comes the first collection of his finest jokes. Featuring the likes of: Garden centres can't reopen fast enough for me, I've been living on borrowed thyme. We can't even afford a garden, so when my girlfriend bought us a trampoline I hit the roof. Sure everyone cares about straws killing dolphins now, but they've been breaking camels' backs for years. Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration, which explains why Prince Andrew is so stupid. Sad news: The British simile champion has died. We shall not see his like again. My mom doesn't trust my dad's secretary. I asked her why, and she just said 'I've seen her type before'. Today someone told me that I look good with a salt 'n' pepper beard, so I took that as a condiment. My French pen friend just said 'Le Monde', which means the world to me. Can anyone tell me what FOMO stands for? Everyone else seems to know. Actors have got Equity, Magicians have got the Magic Circle, but it's a shame ventriloquists don't have anyone to speak for them. Does anyone know if it's safe to dye your pubes? It's a bit of a grey area. And make sure you look out for Gary's next book, about Stockholm Syndrome: it starts off badly but by the end you'll really enjoy it . . .

Pundamentals

Pundamentals PDF Author: Adam Frasz
Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
ISBN: 1098034643
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 53

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Book Description
Need a good joke to brighten your day? Are you looking for jokes that you want to tell to your friends or family that actually work? Do you enjoy those moments where you laugh and then just can't stop? Do you want to experience more God's great gift of laughter? If you said yes to any of the following questions, then this book was made for you. Who said Christians couldn't laugh or enjoy God's gift of laughter? Adam Frasz writes this book as a reminder that anyone can have a good laugh from humor that is free of foul language and inappropriate content. You can enjoy a wide variety of jokes that talk about geography, college life, sports, the Bible, and church and all sorts of random topics. If you are interested in using pick-up lines for possible dates, there are some options in here too (if you dare). The title, Pundamentals, is a joke in and of itself and was thought of long before this book was published. Lastly, Frasz hopes that the laughter that comes from the jokes in his first book can be medicine for those who have rough days or are going through the trials of life. While this is a book was made for Christians, all are welcome to read this book and share jokes with others.

Don't Label Me

Don't Label Me PDF Author: Irshad Manji
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1250182867
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 319

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Book Description
"Don't Label Me should be labeled as genius. It's an amazing book." - Chris Rock A unique conversation about diversity, bigotry, and our common humanity, by the New York Times bestselling author, Oprah “Chutzpah” award-winner, and founder of the Moral Courage Project In these United States, discord has hit emergency levels. Civility isn't the reason to repair our caustic chasms. Diversity is. Don't Label Me shows that America's founding genius is diversity of thought. Which is why social justice activists won't win by labeling those who disagree with them. At a time when minorities are fast becoming the majority, a truly new America requires a new way to tribe out. Enter Irshad Manji and her dog, Lily. Raised to believe that dogs are evil, Manji overcame her fear of the "other" to adopt Lily. She got more than she bargained for. Defying her labels as an old, blind dog, Lily engages Manji in a taboo-busting conversation about identity, power, and politics. They're feisty. They're funny. And in working through their challenges to one another, they reveal how to open the hearts of opponents for the sake of enduring progress. Readers who crave concrete tips will be delighted. Studded with insights from epigenetics and epistemology, layered with the lessons of Bruce Lee, Ben Franklin, and Audre Lorde, punctuated with stories about Manji's own experiences as a refugee from Africa, a Muslim immigrant to the U.S., and a professor of moral courage, Don't Label Me makes diversity great again.

The Biggest Ever Tim Vine Joke Book

The Biggest Ever Tim Vine Joke Book PDF Author: Tim Vine
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1409039307
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 322

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Book Description
The irrepressible, hysterical, puntastical Tim Vine, star of stage and screen, treats all of us here in his first joke book. Packed full of zingers and hilarious illustrations, if this doesn't put a smile on your face, nothing will. What's not to like: The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it. I'm against hunting. I'm actually a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one. Black holes. I don't know what people see in them. So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, 'Nearest the bull goes first.' He went 'Baah' and I went 'Moo'. He said 'You're closest.' Velcro. What a rip-off. Black Beauty. He's a dark horse. I've got a sponge front door. Hey, don't knock it.

The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes

The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes PDF Author: Jeremy Brown
Publisher: Media Lab Books
ISBN: 9781948174732
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 176

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Book Description
From giving as good as he got at the Harvard Lampoon to his comedic work in such films and TV shows as Donovan’s Reef, North to Alaska, Rowan & Martin’s Laugh-In, I Love Lucy, Dean Martin Celebrity Roast and The Red Skelton Hour, John Wayne was never shy about exhibiting his wry, knowing sense of humor. It’s this facet of Duke that The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes captures. A father of six children himself, Duke was no stranger to making kids crack up (or at least trying to). This book presents those stories of Duke as practical joker as well as willing victim, embedded within more than 400 clever, yet dreadful jokes, stories, riddles and puns, perfect for family members of every age. Some of the jokes are Duke- and Western-themed, but most are simply good, original Dad jokes: some good, some bad, some awful, but all funny. Readers will also find inside nearly three dozen fun photos of Duke exhibiting his good humor for all to see, laughing with his kids or fellow actors on set and behind the scenes, making this book a treasure for fans and fathers alike.

All Puns Blazing

All Puns Blazing PDF Author: Geoff Rowe
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1473590299
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 272

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Book Description
I don't like to brag but I can control a kayak brilliantly. Canoe? 'Pardon' is the only French word that I know. I can only apologise. From Geoff Rowe and the Leicester Comedy Festival comes this brilliant tribute to that most British of jokes, the humble pun. Including a foreword from Dr Oliver Double and a wealth of hilarious (and occasionally groan-inducing) material from some of Britain's finest stand-up comedic talent, All Puns Blazing is a fun and fitting celebration of grassroots UK comedy. Featuring puns from: El Baldiniho - Lovdev Barpaga - Zahra Barri - Adele Cliff - Tony Cowards - Henry Dawe - Pauline Eyre - Friz Frizzle - Masai Graham - Sean Hegarty - Kevin Hudson - Leo Kearse - Colin Leggo - Nigel Lovell - Iain MacDonald - Kat Molinari - Laura Monmoth - Joseph Murphy - Graham Musk - Sean Patrick - Richard Pulsford - Paul Savage - Philip Simon - Rob Thomas - Andrew Tymms - Stevie Vegas - Chris Norton Walker - Darren Walsh - Richard Woolford - Jenan Younis

Open Minded Torah

Open Minded Torah PDF Author: William Kolbrener
Publisher: A&C Black
ISBN: 1441118667
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 239

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Book Description
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Egghead

Egghead PDF Author: Bo Burnham
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
ISBN: 145551912X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 278

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Book Description
A strange and charming collection of hilariously absurd poetry, writing, and illustration from one of today's most popular young comedians?Ķ Bo Burnham was a precocious teenager living in his parents' attic when he started posting material on YouTube. 100 million people viewed those videos, turning Bo into an online sensation with a huge and dedicated following. Bo taped his first of two Comedy Central specials four days after his 18th birthday, making him the youngest to do so in the channel's history. Now Bo is a rising star in the comedy world, revered for his utterly original and intelligent voice. And, he can SIIIIIIIIING! In Egghead, Bo brings his brand of brainy, emotional comedy to the page in the form of off-kilter poems, thoughts, and more. Teaming up with his longtime friend, artist, and illustrator Chance Bone, Bo takes on everything from death to farts in this weird book that will make you think, laugh and think, "why did I just laugh?"

Dad Jokes

Dad Jokes PDF Author: Editors of Portable Press
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1684120071
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 254

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Book Description
Dad’s comedy arsenal is about to get a huge upgrade . . . to the relief of everyone around him! Cue the groans. Put an end to courtesy laughs and awkward silences with the jokes in this book! From the people who brought you Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader, this is an eclectic collection of the punniest, funniest, most outrageous knee-slappers that have ever been told! At work, at home, at the game—Dad will beat them all to the punch—line, that is! He’ll be hip and humorous with totally bodacious jokes like these: Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time, too! Why is Christmas just like another day in the office? Because you do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit! Dad: “I wouldn’t want to be buried in this graveyard.” Kid: “Why not?” Dad: “Because I'm not dead yet!” And many more!