Author: Jim Norton
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1416968520
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 290
Book Description
When New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton isn't paying for massages with happy endings, or pretending to be fooled by transsexuals he picks up, he spends his time wondering what certain people would look like on fire... What do Heather Mills, the Reverend Al Sharpton, and Dr. Phil have in common? Jim Norton hates their guts. And he probably hates yours, too, especially if you're a New York Yankee, Starbucks employee, or Steve Martin. In thirty-five hilarious essays, New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton spews bile on the people he loathes. Enjoy his blistering attacks on Derek Jeter, Hillary Clinton, fatso Al Roker, and mush-mouthed Jesse Jackson. It's utterly hilarious -- and utterly relatable if you've ever bitten a stranger's face or thrown a bottle through the TV screen while watching the news. But don't think Jim just dishes loads of shit on his self-proclaimed enemies; he is equally atrocious to himself. He savages himself for his humiliating days as a white homeboy, his balletlike spins in the outfield during a little league game, and his embarrassingly botched attempt at a celebrity shout-out while taping his new HBO stand-up series. Uncomfortably honest, I Hate Your Guts is probably the best example of emotional vomiting you'll ever read. But there is hope; at the end of each essay, Jim generously offers helpful suggestions as to how the offender can make things right again: Eliot Spitzer: If you run for re-election, instead of shaking hands with voters, let them smell your fingers. Reverend Al Sharpton: The next time you feel the need to protest, do so dressed as an elk in Ted Nugent's backyard. Hillary Clinton: When you absolutely must make a point of laughing publicly, don't fake it. Just think of something that genuinely makes you laugh, like lowering taxes or any random male having his penis cut off. For the legions of devoted fans who know Jim Norton for his raw, sometimes brutal comedy, I Hate Your Guts is what you've been waiting for. But even more important -- it's a great book to read while taking a shit.
I Hate Your Guts
Author: Jim Norton
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1416968520
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 290
Book Description
When New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton isn't paying for massages with happy endings, or pretending to be fooled by transsexuals he picks up, he spends his time wondering what certain people would look like on fire... What do Heather Mills, the Reverend Al Sharpton, and Dr. Phil have in common? Jim Norton hates their guts. And he probably hates yours, too, especially if you're a New York Yankee, Starbucks employee, or Steve Martin. In thirty-five hilarious essays, New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton spews bile on the people he loathes. Enjoy his blistering attacks on Derek Jeter, Hillary Clinton, fatso Al Roker, and mush-mouthed Jesse Jackson. It's utterly hilarious -- and utterly relatable if you've ever bitten a stranger's face or thrown a bottle through the TV screen while watching the news. But don't think Jim just dishes loads of shit on his self-proclaimed enemies; he is equally atrocious to himself. He savages himself for his humiliating days as a white homeboy, his balletlike spins in the outfield during a little league game, and his embarrassingly botched attempt at a celebrity shout-out while taping his new HBO stand-up series. Uncomfortably honest, I Hate Your Guts is probably the best example of emotional vomiting you'll ever read. But there is hope; at the end of each essay, Jim generously offers helpful suggestions as to how the offender can make things right again: Eliot Spitzer: If you run for re-election, instead of shaking hands with voters, let them smell your fingers. Reverend Al Sharpton: The next time you feel the need to protest, do so dressed as an elk in Ted Nugent's backyard. Hillary Clinton: When you absolutely must make a point of laughing publicly, don't fake it. Just think of something that genuinely makes you laugh, like lowering taxes or any random male having his penis cut off. For the legions of devoted fans who know Jim Norton for his raw, sometimes brutal comedy, I Hate Your Guts is what you've been waiting for. But even more important -- it's a great book to read while taking a shit.
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1416968520
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 290
Book Description
When New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton isn't paying for massages with happy endings, or pretending to be fooled by transsexuals he picks up, he spends his time wondering what certain people would look like on fire... What do Heather Mills, the Reverend Al Sharpton, and Dr. Phil have in common? Jim Norton hates their guts. And he probably hates yours, too, especially if you're a New York Yankee, Starbucks employee, or Steve Martin. In thirty-five hilarious essays, New York Times bestselling author and comedian Jim Norton spews bile on the people he loathes. Enjoy his blistering attacks on Derek Jeter, Hillary Clinton, fatso Al Roker, and mush-mouthed Jesse Jackson. It's utterly hilarious -- and utterly relatable if you've ever bitten a stranger's face or thrown a bottle through the TV screen while watching the news. But don't think Jim just dishes loads of shit on his self-proclaimed enemies; he is equally atrocious to himself. He savages himself for his humiliating days as a white homeboy, his balletlike spins in the outfield during a little league game, and his embarrassingly botched attempt at a celebrity shout-out while taping his new HBO stand-up series. Uncomfortably honest, I Hate Your Guts is probably the best example of emotional vomiting you'll ever read. But there is hope; at the end of each essay, Jim generously offers helpful suggestions as to how the offender can make things right again: Eliot Spitzer: If you run for re-election, instead of shaking hands with voters, let them smell your fingers. Reverend Al Sharpton: The next time you feel the need to protest, do so dressed as an elk in Ted Nugent's backyard. Hillary Clinton: When you absolutely must make a point of laughing publicly, don't fake it. Just think of something that genuinely makes you laugh, like lowering taxes or any random male having his penis cut off. For the legions of devoted fans who know Jim Norton for his raw, sometimes brutal comedy, I Hate Your Guts is what you've been waiting for. But even more important -- it's a great book to read while taking a shit.
Who Will Help Jack Off the Horse?
Author: Bimisi Tayanita
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781946178077
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :
Book Description
"...and of course the whimsical poetic meter known as iambic tetrameter is no more capable of exclusive ownership than the air we all breath."--Bimisi to Theodor Seuss GeislIt is entirely possible to wake up in the morning with no intention of learning anything at all, but learning something substantial, nonetheless. It was a typical Wednesday afternoon at their favorite dive bar. Bimisi and Sumguyen were sparring, via a spirited match of online trivia, with patrons of a similar dive bar in another part of the world...a part of the world where it most likely was not still Wednesday afternoon. The final question...at least the last question they heard before scrambling for a pen and paper to get to work on their first parody was this:Madonna, Michael Jackson and _____ are the only 3 artists who have had a top 40 hit in 4 different decades.ANSWER: Weird Al Yankovic
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781946178077
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :
Book Description
"...and of course the whimsical poetic meter known as iambic tetrameter is no more capable of exclusive ownership than the air we all breath."--Bimisi to Theodor Seuss GeislIt is entirely possible to wake up in the morning with no intention of learning anything at all, but learning something substantial, nonetheless. It was a typical Wednesday afternoon at their favorite dive bar. Bimisi and Sumguyen were sparring, via a spirited match of online trivia, with patrons of a similar dive bar in another part of the world...a part of the world where it most likely was not still Wednesday afternoon. The final question...at least the last question they heard before scrambling for a pen and paper to get to work on their first parody was this:Madonna, Michael Jackson and _____ are the only 3 artists who have had a top 40 hit in 4 different decades.ANSWER: Weird Al Yankovic
Laughter
Author: S.P. Sharma
Publisher: Pustak Mahal
ISBN: 9788122308167
Category : Health & Fitness
Languages : en
Pages : 124
Book Description
Be the soul of the party.Find favour with your associates in business,or social circles!Get going with Laughter-the Secret of Good Health!In fact,the fastest way to break the ice in many a situation is to crack a joke. Which is why Danish pianist Victor Borge had quipped: Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.This book is replete with humorous one-liners, quips, quotes and anecdotes that will have you rolling with laughter.The book also dwells on famous humourists and other personalities with a sharp sense of humour, including Mark Twain, George Bernard Shaw, Oscar Wilde, Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln and Mahatma Gandhi, amongst others.Jokes apart, laughter also has multiple therapeutic benefits, as attested by medicalmen--and elucidated by oft-repeated maxim,Laughter is the best medicine.Indeed, in March 1995, the first Laughter Club was launched by a Mumbai-based doctor precisely for its therapeutic benefits.This book also tells you all about the scientific benefits of laughter. So read, laugh and be merry!For therein lies the secret of good health and happiness.
Publisher: Pustak Mahal
ISBN: 9788122308167
Category : Health & Fitness
Languages : en
Pages : 124
Book Description
Be the soul of the party.Find favour with your associates in business,or social circles!Get going with Laughter-the Secret of Good Health!In fact,the fastest way to break the ice in many a situation is to crack a joke. Which is why Danish pianist Victor Borge had quipped: Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.This book is replete with humorous one-liners, quips, quotes and anecdotes that will have you rolling with laughter.The book also dwells on famous humourists and other personalities with a sharp sense of humour, including Mark Twain, George Bernard Shaw, Oscar Wilde, Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln and Mahatma Gandhi, amongst others.Jokes apart, laughter also has multiple therapeutic benefits, as attested by medicalmen--and elucidated by oft-repeated maxim,Laughter is the best medicine.Indeed, in March 1995, the first Laughter Club was launched by a Mumbai-based doctor precisely for its therapeutic benefits.This book also tells you all about the scientific benefits of laughter. So read, laugh and be merry!For therein lies the secret of good health and happiness.
Soljer Soljer
Author: Mahip Chadha
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1467067393
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 223
Book Description
Soljer Soljer is a story based on an imaginary infantry battalion of the Third Gorkha Rifles — the Sixth battalion. The composition, training, camaraderie, and duties in all the other infantry battalions of our Army are almost the same except that certain customs undergo a change as they adapt to the ethnicity of the troops in that Regiment. So the visible changes would be the manner of the battle cry, salutation, greeting, decorum in festivity with the troops, or ceremonials in the Officer's Mess. There is no difference in the dogged determination or the ferocity in the will of troops of these troops in completing any mission allotted to their battalions! Colonel Mahip Chadha, whom I have not only known from our training days, but served with; has very clearly brought out the joys of the simple infantry life and the deeply embedded love, affections and stoic ethnic involvement that officers enjoy with their men. This is brotherhood in its purest form. The story is of Surinder Singh Sahni and his son Jaskaran who as father and son serve in the same battalion. Brigadier Sahni resigns from the Army due to domestic issues while his son enjoys a brief and very modern marriage thanks to considerate parents. Brigadier Sahni has to face terms with reality when he reads about the Indian POWs and later when his son is declared missing believed killed after a skirmish with militants from POK. His misery is compounded when his daughter in law has to suffer further privations, till she decides to fight the establishment by becoming a lawyer. The sacrifices made by the cowherds in rescuing Jaskaran are poignant and are noble.Jaskaran returns home as his amnesia wears off in another accident. His mother like all mothers refuses to believe that he is dead.There is a God in heaven who reunites the family. The question which plagues Jaskaran is--whether his countrymen recognised his loss-- The book has a sprinkling of humour and the reader laughs at the follies of life. Mahip has told his story as an infantry officer would — straight, to the point and without beating about the bush which makes enjoyable reading! Lieutenant General G S Negi PVSM AVSM* VSM Erstwhile Colonel The Third Gorkha Rifles The Indian Army
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1467067393
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 223
Book Description
Soljer Soljer is a story based on an imaginary infantry battalion of the Third Gorkha Rifles — the Sixth battalion. The composition, training, camaraderie, and duties in all the other infantry battalions of our Army are almost the same except that certain customs undergo a change as they adapt to the ethnicity of the troops in that Regiment. So the visible changes would be the manner of the battle cry, salutation, greeting, decorum in festivity with the troops, or ceremonials in the Officer's Mess. There is no difference in the dogged determination or the ferocity in the will of troops of these troops in completing any mission allotted to their battalions! Colonel Mahip Chadha, whom I have not only known from our training days, but served with; has very clearly brought out the joys of the simple infantry life and the deeply embedded love, affections and stoic ethnic involvement that officers enjoy with their men. This is brotherhood in its purest form. The story is of Surinder Singh Sahni and his son Jaskaran who as father and son serve in the same battalion. Brigadier Sahni resigns from the Army due to domestic issues while his son enjoys a brief and very modern marriage thanks to considerate parents. Brigadier Sahni has to face terms with reality when he reads about the Indian POWs and later when his son is declared missing believed killed after a skirmish with militants from POK. His misery is compounded when his daughter in law has to suffer further privations, till she decides to fight the establishment by becoming a lawyer. The sacrifices made by the cowherds in rescuing Jaskaran are poignant and are noble.Jaskaran returns home as his amnesia wears off in another accident. His mother like all mothers refuses to believe that he is dead.There is a God in heaven who reunites the family. The question which plagues Jaskaran is--whether his countrymen recognised his loss-- The book has a sprinkling of humour and the reader laughs at the follies of life. Mahip has told his story as an infantry officer would — straight, to the point and without beating about the bush which makes enjoyable reading! Lieutenant General G S Negi PVSM AVSM* VSM Erstwhile Colonel The Third Gorkha Rifles The Indian Army
The Bathroom Key
Author: Kathryn Kassai
Publisher: Demos Medical Publishing
ISBN: 1936303213
Category : Health & Fitness
Languages : en
Pages : 294
Book Description
Print+CourseSmart
Publisher: Demos Medical Publishing
ISBN: 1936303213
Category : Health & Fitness
Languages : en
Pages : 294
Book Description
Print+CourseSmart
Little Big Man
Author: Thomas Berger
Publisher: Dial Press
ISBN: 0307788997
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 475
Book Description
“The truth is always made up of little particulars which sound ridiculous when repeated.” So says Jack Crabb, the 111-year-old narrator of Thomas Berger’s 1964 masterpiece of American fiction, Little Big Man. Berger claimed the Western as serious literature with this savage and epic account of one man’s extraordinary double life. After surviving the massacre of his pioneer family, ten-year-old Jack is adopted by an Indian chief who nicknames him Little Big Man. As a Cheyenne, he feasts on dog, loves four wives, and sees his people butchered by horse soldiers commanded by General George Armstrong Custer. Later, living as a white man once more, he hunts the buffalo to near-extinction, tangles with Wyatt Earp, cheats Wild Bill Hickok, and fights in the Battle of Little Bighorn alongside Custer himself—a man he’d sworn to kill. Hailed by The Nation as “a seminal event,” Little Big Man is a singular literary achievement that, like its hero, only gets better with age. Praise for Little Big Man “An epic such as Mark Twain might have given us.”—Henry Miller “The very best novel ever about the American West.”—The New York Times Book Review “Spellbinding . . . [Crabb] surely must be one of the most delightfully absurd fictional fossils ever unearthed.”—Time “Superb . . . Berger’s success in capturing the points of view and emotional atmosphere of a vanished era is uncanny. His skill in characterization, his narrative power and his somewhat cynical humor are all outstanding.”—The New York Times
Publisher: Dial Press
ISBN: 0307788997
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 475
Book Description
“The truth is always made up of little particulars which sound ridiculous when repeated.” So says Jack Crabb, the 111-year-old narrator of Thomas Berger’s 1964 masterpiece of American fiction, Little Big Man. Berger claimed the Western as serious literature with this savage and epic account of one man’s extraordinary double life. After surviving the massacre of his pioneer family, ten-year-old Jack is adopted by an Indian chief who nicknames him Little Big Man. As a Cheyenne, he feasts on dog, loves four wives, and sees his people butchered by horse soldiers commanded by General George Armstrong Custer. Later, living as a white man once more, he hunts the buffalo to near-extinction, tangles with Wyatt Earp, cheats Wild Bill Hickok, and fights in the Battle of Little Bighorn alongside Custer himself—a man he’d sworn to kill. Hailed by The Nation as “a seminal event,” Little Big Man is a singular literary achievement that, like its hero, only gets better with age. Praise for Little Big Man “An epic such as Mark Twain might have given us.”—Henry Miller “The very best novel ever about the American West.”—The New York Times Book Review “Spellbinding . . . [Crabb] surely must be one of the most delightfully absurd fictional fossils ever unearthed.”—Time “Superb . . . Berger’s success in capturing the points of view and emotional atmosphere of a vanished era is uncanny. His skill in characterization, his narrative power and his somewhat cynical humor are all outstanding.”—The New York Times
Author:
Publisher: Lulu.com
ISBN: 0557405807
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 500
Book Description
Publisher: Lulu.com
ISBN: 0557405807
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 500
Book Description
The Apprentice ... Taken from the Manager's Book at the Theatre Royal, Drury Lane
Author: Arthur Murphy
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 34
Book Description
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 34
Book Description
The British drama
Author: British drama
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 630
Book Description
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 630
Book Description
What Comes After
Author: JoAnne Tompkins
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 059308599X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 434
Book Description
Runner Up for the Dayton Literary Peace Prize Finalist for the Washington State Book Award Edgar Prize Finalist for Best Debut Novel by an American Author Shortlisted for the Prix Libre Nous, Best Foreign Book in French Translation New York Times, Group Text Pick for April 2021 New York Times Editor's Choice Pick Named a top beach read of summer by Oprah Daily, Good Housekeeping, The Wall Street Journal, and more “Nail-biting wallop of a debut . . . a thoughtful, unexpectedly optimistic tale.” —The New York Times “If you enjoyed The Searcher by Tana French, read What Comes After by JoAnne Tompkins. . . . a mystery—and a gritty meditation on loss and redemption, drenched in stillness and grief.” —The Washington Post After the shocking death of two teenage boys tears apart a community in the Pacific Northwest, a mysterious pregnant girl emerges out of the woods and into the lives of those same boys’ families—a moving and hopeful novel about forgiveness and human connection. In misty, coastal Washington State, Isaac lives alone with his dog, grieving the recent death of his teenage son, Daniel. Next door, Lorrie, a working single mother, struggles with a heinous act committed by her own teenage son. Separated by only a silvery stretch of trees, the two parents are emotionally stranded, isolated by their great losses—until an unfamiliar sixteen-year-old girl shows up, bridges the gap, and changes everything. Evangeline’s arrival at first feels like a blessing, but she is also clearly hiding something. When Isaac, who has retreated into his Quaker faith, isn’t equipped to handle her alone, Lorrie forges her own relationship with the girl. Soon all three characters are forced to examine what really happened in their overlapping pasts, and what it all possibly means for a shared future. With a propulsive mystery at its core, What Comes After offers an unforgettable story of loss and anger, but also of kindness and hope, courage and forgiveness. It is a deeply moving account of strangers and friends not only helping each other forward after tragedy but inspiring a new kind of family.
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 059308599X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 434
Book Description
Runner Up for the Dayton Literary Peace Prize Finalist for the Washington State Book Award Edgar Prize Finalist for Best Debut Novel by an American Author Shortlisted for the Prix Libre Nous, Best Foreign Book in French Translation New York Times, Group Text Pick for April 2021 New York Times Editor's Choice Pick Named a top beach read of summer by Oprah Daily, Good Housekeeping, The Wall Street Journal, and more “Nail-biting wallop of a debut . . . a thoughtful, unexpectedly optimistic tale.” —The New York Times “If you enjoyed The Searcher by Tana French, read What Comes After by JoAnne Tompkins. . . . a mystery—and a gritty meditation on loss and redemption, drenched in stillness and grief.” —The Washington Post After the shocking death of two teenage boys tears apart a community in the Pacific Northwest, a mysterious pregnant girl emerges out of the woods and into the lives of those same boys’ families—a moving and hopeful novel about forgiveness and human connection. In misty, coastal Washington State, Isaac lives alone with his dog, grieving the recent death of his teenage son, Daniel. Next door, Lorrie, a working single mother, struggles with a heinous act committed by her own teenage son. Separated by only a silvery stretch of trees, the two parents are emotionally stranded, isolated by their great losses—until an unfamiliar sixteen-year-old girl shows up, bridges the gap, and changes everything. Evangeline’s arrival at first feels like a blessing, but she is also clearly hiding something. When Isaac, who has retreated into his Quaker faith, isn’t equipped to handle her alone, Lorrie forges her own relationship with the girl. Soon all three characters are forced to examine what really happened in their overlapping pasts, and what it all possibly means for a shared future. With a propulsive mystery at its core, What Comes After offers an unforgettable story of loss and anger, but also of kindness and hope, courage and forgiveness. It is a deeply moving account of strangers and friends not only helping each other forward after tragedy but inspiring a new kind of family.