Don't Bend Over in the Garden, Granny, You Know Them Taters Got Eyes

Don't Bend Over in the Garden, Granny, You Know Them Taters Got Eyes PDF Author: Lewis Grizzard
Publisher: Ballantine Books
ISBN: 9780345419248
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 245

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Book Description
This time Lewis Grizzard has gone and done it--written a book about sex, as seen through his bespectacled, ironic squint. He tells us why Junior Leaguers don't do it in groups, why Baptists won't do it standing up, and why Richard Nixon never did it, among other things. "From the Paperback edition.

Don't Bend Over in the Garden, Granny, You Know Them Taters Got Eyes

Don't Bend Over in the Garden, Granny, You Know Them Taters Got Eyes PDF Author: Lewis Grizzard
Publisher: Ballantine Books
ISBN: 9780345419248
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 245

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Book Description
This time Lewis Grizzard has gone and done it--written a book about sex, as seen through his bespectacled, ironic squint. He tells us why Junior Leaguers don't do it in groups, why Baptists won't do it standing up, and why Richard Nixon never did it, among other things. "From the Paperback edition.

If I Ever Get Back to Georgia, I'm Gonna Nail My Feet to the Ground

If I Ever Get Back to Georgia, I'm Gonna Nail My Feet to the Ground PDF Author: Lewis Grizzard
Publisher: NewSouth Books
ISBN: 1588382737
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 418

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Book Description
Lewis Grizzard got his first newspaper job when he was ten years old. Thirty-odd years later (thirty-very-odd years) he's still in the newspaper business--and he's still infuriated by it, still tickled by it, and still very much in love with it. If I Ever Get Back to Georgia, I'm Gonna Nail My Feet to the Ground is all about that anger, that great humor and that even greater passion for something that affects every single one of us: the daily newspaper. Grizzard begins with his first writing job (covering a Boy's Church League team in Newman, Georgia), and continues through his college years in Athens, Georgia, where he learned how to do such things as prepare a front-page headline and layout in case Jesus Christ ever returned to earth. (Headline: HE'S BACK!) He examines the great Atlanta years and the cold Chicago winters--as sports editor of the Sun-Times, during which Grizzard lost his second wife, his cool, and very nearly his sanity, but also learned an awful lot about life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. This is Grizzard's funniest--and his best--book yet.

Elvis Is Dead and I Don't Feel So Good Myself

Elvis Is Dead and I Don't Feel So Good Myself PDF Author: Lewis Grizzard
Publisher: NewSouth Books
ISBN: 1603060839
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 258

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Book Description
The 1950s were simple times to grow up. For Lewis Grizzard and his buddies, gallivanting meant hanging out at the local store, eating Zagnut candy bars and drinking "Big Orange bellywashers." About the worst thing a kid ever did was smoke rabbit tobacco rolled in paper torn from a brown grocery sack, or maybe slick back his hair into a ducktail and try gyrating his hips like Elvis. But then assassinations, war, civil rights, free love, and drugs rocked the old order. And as they did, Grizzard frequently felt lost and confused. In place of Elvis, the Pied Piper of his generation, Grizzard now found wormy-looking, long-haired English kids who performed either half-naked or dressed like Zasu Pitts. Elvis Is Dead and I Don't Feel So Good Myself is the witty, satiric, nostalgic account of Grizzard's efforts to survive in a changing world. Sex, music, clothes, entertainment, and life itself receive the Grizzard treatment. In this, his sixth book, Grizzard was never funnier or more in tune with his readers. He might not have felt so good himself, but his social commentary and humor can still make the rest of us feel just fine.

Southern by the Grace of God

Southern by the Grace of God PDF Author: Lewis Grizzard
Publisher: Taylor Trade Publishing
ISBN: 9781563522796
Category : American wit and humor
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
The incomparable Grizzard shares anecdotes of his beloved homeland. No other contemporary humorist knew the South so well, loved it so passionately, or wrote about it so vividly.

Chili Dawgs Always Bark at Night

Chili Dawgs Always Bark at Night PDF Author: Lewis Grizzard
Publisher: NewSouth Books
ISBN: 1588383032
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 232

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Book Description
The author of the phenomenal - and hilarious - best-seller Don't Bend over in the Garden, Granny, You Know Them Taters Got Eyes is back with an all-new collection of his funniest, sharpest observations yet. In Chili Dawgs Always Bark at Night, Grizzard once again confirms his reputation as the "William Faulkner of just plain folks" using colorful storytelling and his own wonderful brand of humor to tackle such Grizzardian subjects as: International Relations: "If John Wayne were still alive, he'd know what to do to the Japanese investors - take a seven iron and run them and their checkbooks back home before it's too late and Vanna White has to learn eight zillion character signs in the Japanese alphabet to keep her job." Fashion: "Don't wear anything that features a picture of a pelican, a pink flamingo or a beer can." The Future: "I'm predicting the world isn't going to come to an end anytime soon. There's too much unresolved, like whether or not Elvis is still alive, Jimmy Swaggart can stay on television, and if there will be another Rambo sequel." Dating: "Any single white female who has to resort to taking out an ad to find a boyfriend would take a SWM who's into yodeling, Hustler magazine, Ripple and robbing convenience stores." Getting Back to Nature: "Snakes are right up there with the things that I fear most. Lightning is on that list. So is flying in bad weather at night, the dentist, and revenge-minded ex-wives." People Who Cheat in the 12-Items-or-Less Express Lane: "Previously, I have dog-cussed these people and put curses on them, like, 'May your children grow up to be liberal Democrats.' I'm not going to be that mean-spirited anymore. What I'm going to do is go to the vegetable bin, grab a large cucumber, and beat them about the head and shoulders with it." Lewis Grizzard offers his views on everything from politics, religion, sex and golf to the largest condom heist in history, proving he is wittier and more outrageous than ever. Chili Dawgs Always Bark at Night shows why the South's most popular humorist is now America's most popular funny man.

How Bluegrass Music Destroyed My Life

How Bluegrass Music Destroyed My Life PDF Author: John Fahey
Publisher: Drag City
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 312

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Book Description
John Fahey is feared and revered around the world as a guitar player and composer. His inventions for acoustic and electric strings are the stuff of legend. Known for his finger-picking finesse, Fahey's pen has the same world-gobbling ferocity as his guitar. Fahey's collection of short stories defy classification - part memoir, part personal essay, part fiction, part manifesto. It is a collection that makes an explosive selection of his work available for public consumption. What else is there to say, except 'Grab your ankles, dear readers. It's kingdom time!'

Lewis Grizzard on Fear of Flying

Lewis Grizzard on Fear of Flying PDF Author: Lewis Grizzard
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780929264219
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 68

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Book Description
This humorous treatment of one of the country's most common neuroses will make the perfect gift for frequent flyers.

Ulysses

Ulysses PDF Author:
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :

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Book Description


It Wasn't Always Easy, But I Sure Had Fun

It Wasn't Always Easy, But I Sure Had Fun PDF Author: Lewis Grizzard
Publisher: Macmillan Reference USA
ISBN: 9780783812878
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 372

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Book Description
The book Grizzard was working on when he died, and contains what he thought represented the best of the last decade of his writing.

Daughter of the White River

Daughter of the White River PDF Author: Denise Parkinson
Publisher: Arcadia Publishing
ISBN: 1625840136
Category : True Crime
Languages : en
Pages : 173

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Book Description
The tragic, true story of Helen Spence, the teenager who murdered her father’s killers in the insulated lower White River area of Arkansas in 1931. The once-thriving houseboat communities along Arkansas’s White River are long gone, and few remember the sensational murder story that set local darling Helen Spence on a tragic path. In 1931, Spence shocked Arkansas when she avenged her father’s murder in a DeWitt courtroom. The state soon discovered that no prison could hold her. For the first time, prison records are unveiled to provide an essential portrait. Join author Denise Parkinson for an intimate look at a Depression-era tragedy. The legend of Helen Spence refuses to be forgotten—despite her unmarked grave. “Most memorably, Parkinson evokes the natural beauty of the White River itself. But more importantly, she’s given Helen Spence, daughter of the river, a sympathetic hearing—something in its pulp version of events Daring Detective did not.”—Memphis Flyer “Denise details Helen’s life, from the murder of her father to the horrific treatment she received at the hands of the law, including how prison officials seemed to entice her to escape a final time, with the attempt culminating in her murder.”—Only in Arkansas