Wearing of This Garment Does Not Enable You to Fly

Wearing of This Garment Does Not Enable You to Fly PDF Author: Jeff Koon
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0743244753
Category : Consumer protection
Languages : en
Pages : 168

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Book Description
A collection of 101 of the dumbest product warnings you'll ever see.

Let God Change Your Life

Let God Change Your Life PDF Author: Greg Laurie
Publisher: David C Cook
ISBN: 1434703681
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 290

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Book Description
Evangelist Greg Laurie calls all Christians back to radical New Testament living in his latest offering, Let God Change Your Life. Imagine what it would have been like to be a follower of Jesus; first-century Christians walked away from their old lives just to be where He was. What they learned, sitting at His feet, was discipleship. And when His work on earth was done, first-century Christians took His words and example and spread out, teaching the gospel to everyone. The good news is that we, too, can participate in this lifestyle. Laurie drills it down in three simple ideas: get to know Jesus, follow His plan for discipleship, and use it to tell others what we know. Laurie’s tone is clear, direct, and biblical.

The 12 Principles of Pyong'hwa

The 12 Principles of Pyong'hwa PDF Author: Steev RamsDell
Publisher: BalboaPress
ISBN: 1452549273
Category : Body, Mind & Spirit
Languages : en
Pages : 400

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Book Description
Pyonghwa translates to English as peace and tranquility. The 12 Principles bring new understandings and enlightenments to ease lifes journey and to serve as a powerful yet comforting guide for every day and every moment of your experiences going forward. A fun, entertaining and easy read, each Principle is presented with memorable combinations of humor, insight, personal narratives and the collected wisdom of the ages. There are over 250 quotations of valuable perspectives, including everyone from Einstein, Disney, Gandhi, Shakespeare, Franklin, Lincoln, Kennedy and Mother Teresa, to Nin, Dyer, Forbes, Emerson, Aristophanes, Maher, and many more. Plus Zen, Buddhist, and Scottish proverbs, biblical citations, and original creations, including a direct quote from the Almighty, Here you go: Life! Lets see what you do with it. There are cultural references spanning the generations, with more than sixty movie associations, including the memorable lines of Eastwood, Elvis, Sinatra, Marx, Chaplin, Buehler, Master Oogway, Forrest Gump, Captain James T. Kirk, and more. Plus apt quotations from celebrities of all sorts, including Michael Jordan, Robin Williams, Carly Simon, Will Rogers, Bill Cosby, George Burns, Doris Day, Rod Stewart, Gary Larson, Peter Ustinov, Yogi Berra, and many more. In an increasingly complex, fast-changing and emotionally challenging world, pathways and perspectives for more peace and tranquility are needed more than ever. This book will guide you along a path that will bring you to the yin of greater optimism, inner calm, appreciation and understanding, while providing the yang of new opportunity to create and realize your own joyful being!

Greatest Jokes of the Century Book 3

Greatest Jokes of the Century Book 3 PDF Author: Thomas F. Shubnell
Publisher: Thomas F. Shubnell
ISBN: 1440416990
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 175

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Book Description
It is hard to imagine that this third book could be even funnier than the first two, but it is. Can't get enough laughter, try this one on for size. Laughter is addicting. To triple your fun. You must share it with others.

Where Did My America Go?

Where Did My America Go? PDF Author: Michael Solomon
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1425966187
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 234

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Book Description
So many young mothers feel burned out because they take care of a family as well as work to pay the bills. They also may have to deal with being abused by husbands or boyfriends, trying to give as much as they can to keep their family together. I know, because I've been there. I hope that this book will help out in some way. Read this book slowly, gain a positive attitude, and work it out; you can do it. A country girl who knew nothing did.

Jokes, Quotes, and Other Assorted Things

Jokes, Quotes, and Other Assorted Things PDF Author: Stephen Motway
Publisher: Xlibris Corporation
ISBN: 1456825011
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 546

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Book Description
There is no available information at this time.

I’ve Seen You Naked

I’ve Seen You Naked PDF Author: B.S. Hayden
Publisher: Xlibris Corporation
ISBN: 1479745685
Category : Travel
Languages : en
Pages : 64

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Book Description
Chapter One In this chapter is the information needed to prepare for your journey and what to as well as what not to pack in your luggage. So let’s get right to it and make your next trip a safe and more pleasurable experience. First off let’s get you in the mindset for flying and the need for planning. When planning a trip one usually has a certain destination in mind. Whether your destination is for business or pleasure the principals are the same. There is always how long are you staying and what to bring? The how long are you planning to stay is usually already established in most cases. However, in the case of the business traveler whose schedules is determined by the office, a client, or even flight schedules may dictate ones planning. This usually means everything is up in the air and can leave a lot to be desired. With this in mind whether business or pleasure the basics still apply. So let’s look at the traveler that is planning a pleasure trip. In this case the time to think about the airport is when you start planning your trip. Since the events on September 11, 2001, the whole mind set of traveling has been put on it ear so to speak. As it is with most individuals, myself included before I became a Transportation Security Officer (TSO) with the (TSA) in 2002, the name of the game was haphazard packing as a rule of thumb. This is what I call having most of the items in your luggage placed there the night before your departure. Usually these items are things that never get used in the course of ones travels. Such items as too many shoes, clothing, unnecessary foods and some toys are among the many things that are packed in luggage across this nation that need not be included. I am sure most of you know exactly what I am talking about. A good example is when I went sailing on a 32 foot sail boat in the Caribbean for a week with my daughter and son-in-law in 2000. I had packed enough clothes for a week only to use half the items packed. In this case I really only needed a swimsuit, several shirts, two pairs of shoes and traveling clothes. What is my style? There are other types of packers that travel the skyways. One of these is the individual that packs like the ones you might see in the movies or in one of your favorite television programs or commercials. Opening the dresser drawers and just stuffing items in the luggage. These individuals, while in their own rights, see no harm in the form of packing, however, they will have some difficulties at the airport. This form of packing makes inspection of their personal items by TSA difficult at best. With all the modern x-ray equipment used in today’s airports and new technologies being developed continuously, it is still up to the TSO to determine the nature of the items within your luggage. And this form of packing has and does create problems for these passengers. Ways to avoid this will be addressed later in this chapter. Then there is the traveler at the other end of the packing spectrum that has everything folded and arranged perfectly so that everything within that piece of luggage has a rhyme and a purpose for its placement. This can be either a male or a female doing the packing. These types of pack jobs are in themselves great to look at and for the most part we as the ones screening that piece of luggage look forward to. But as in all cases even these types of luggage have their problems too. The level of inspection being performed on that piece of luggage and the individual doing the screening has a lot to do with the level of neatness your luggage is in when returned to you. Not all TSOs, to be honest with you, are interested in repacking your items as carefully as you would. Even though the TSA has spent many hours training TSOs on the proper procedures for inspecting person’s luggage and the items within that piece of luggage, the manner in which the luggage has been packed may cause difficulties in its self.

Wearing of this Garment Will Not Enable You to Fly

Wearing of this Garment Will Not Enable You to Fly PDF Author: Jeff Koon
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category : Warning labels
Languages : en
Pages : 157

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Book Description
America's famous teenage stalkers of stupidity are back! From the authors of You May Not Tie an Alligator to a Fire Hydrant, here is a collection of 101 of the dumbest product warnings you'll ever see. The infamous 1994 McDonald's hot coffee lawsuit has spawned a veritable industry of "hot" warnings, from Kellogg's Pop-Tarts admonition that "[i]f pastry is overheated, frosting/filling can become extremely hot and could cause burns" to the Black Cat Fireworks label: "Caution: flammable. Do not put in mouth." If, on the other hand, you manage to escape the heat with a trip to the beach, be warned that a twenty-inch beach ball is "NOT a lifesaving device." Kids (and maybe even parents) might be forgiven, however, for thinking that Mr. Bubbles Body Wash for Kids of All Ages would be okay to use if they missed the warning label: "Caution. Keep out of reach of young children." In the brave new world of technology, users frustrated by the gobbledygook of users' manuals will be relieved that their warning labels at least make sense: the Sun StarOffice End User License Agreement warns users that "software is not designed, licensed or intended for use in the design, construction, operation or maintenance of any nuclear facility," while the SGI IRIS Indigo Workstation manual tells you, "Don't dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at coworkers." And for those who just can't quite figure out what to do with some of their new purchases, this might help: "Use Gold Dial as you would ordinary soap" explains the Dial soap label.

Would You Rather ... ?

Would You Rather ... ? PDF Author: Randy Horn
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 9780761124207
Category : Games & Activities
Languages : en
Pages : 424

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Book Description
Would You Rather...? takes the idea of parlor game questions to a new level of debate and lunacy. It's a chunky book of 400 questions that range from the heinous to the nauseating to the downright disturbing, each a field-tested conversation starter-because no matter how strange or far-fetched, Would You Rather...? knows that choice provokes thinking, and thinking is fun. Some questions, like a Rorschach test, reveal values: Would you rather . . . Age only from the neck up-OR-age only from the neck down? Be stupid and rich-OR-smart and poor? Some delight in their own grossness: Eat three earthworms-OR-wear a necklace made of them on your wedding day? Be trapped in an elevator with wet dogs-OR-three fat men with bad breath? Some churn up prejudices: Lose your mate to the same sex as yourself-OR-the opposite sex? Some create that squirming sensation: Get a bad case of poison ivy way up inside your nose-OR-inside your inner ear? Or ethical dilemmas: Be president of a firm that poaches endangered species-OR-work for a corrupt politician? And some are just deliciously absurd: Catch a porcupine thrown from a second-story window-OR-a skunk thrown from the same window? Each question is followed up with related, often off-the-wall information, from odd trivia to dumb jokes to the occasional practical advice (go for the skunk--the porcupine's got 30,000 quills, while tomato juice will take away the skunk smell).

Guilty Pleasures

Guilty Pleasures PDF Author: Laura Little
Publisher: Oxford University Press
ISBN: 0190625783
Category : Law
Languages : en
Pages : 233

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Book Description
Few people associate law books with humor. Yet the legal world--in particular the American legal system--is itself frequently funny. Indeed, jokes about the profession are staples of American comedy. And there is actually humor within the world of law too: both lawyers and judges occasionally strive to be funny to deal with the drudgery of their duties. Just as importantly, though, our legal system is a strong regulator of humor. It encourages some types of humor while muzzling or punishing others. In a sense, law and humor engage a two-way feedback loop: humor provides the raw material for legal regulation and legal regulation inspires humor. In Guilty Pleasures, legal scholar Laura Little provides a multi-faceted account of American law and humor, looking at constraints on humor (and humor's effect on law), humor about law, and humor in law. In addition to interspersing amusing episodes from the legal world throughout the book, the book contains 75 New Yorker cartoons about lawyers and a preface by Bob Mankoff, the cartoon editor for the New Yorker.