Moms Who Drink and Swear

Moms Who Drink and Swear PDF Author: Nicole Knepper
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 110165094X
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 337

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Book Description
If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. This irreverant, hilarious guide to the trials of motherhood makes the perfect gift for mom—or any woman with a huge heart and a mouth that sometimes needs washing out with soap. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.

Moms Who Drink and Swear

Moms Who Drink and Swear PDF Author: Nicole Knepper
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 110165094X
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 337

Get Book Here

Book Description
If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. This irreverant, hilarious guide to the trials of motherhood makes the perfect gift for mom—or any woman with a huge heart and a mouth that sometimes needs washing out with soap. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.

Mommy Drinks Because You Cry

Mommy Drinks Because You Cry PDF Author: Hannah Caner
Publisher: Castle Point Books
ISBN: 9781250119919
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Pull Mommy back from the edge with this irreverent adult coloring book! MOMMY DRINKS BECAUSE YOU CRY is the adult coloring book for the delightfully impolite. For the rare moments you have to yourself, enjoy the calming act of coloring with a little dose of sass. This collection of beautiful designs and fun illustrations are paired with the very best of all our worst thoughts, from “I child-proofed my house, but they still get in,” to “Home is where the vodka is.” Each hilariously captioned design is printed on sturdy, tear-out pages perfect for amusing decoration or passive-aggressive gift-giving. When you want to unwind with coloring but aren’t in the mood to embrace sunshine and daisies, MOMMY DRINKS BECAUSE YOU CRY is the perfect adult coloring book to let you speak your native sarcasm!

Drunk Mom

Drunk Mom PDF Author: Jowita Bydlowska
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0698156390
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 234

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Book Description
“An intense, complex and disturbing story, bravely and beautifully told. I read Drunk Mom with my jaw on the floor, which doesn’t happen to me that often.” —Lena Dunham Three years after giving up drinking, Jowita Bydlowska found herself throwing back a glass of champagne like it was ginger ale. It was a special occasion: a party celebrating the birth of her first child. It also marked Bydlowska’s immediate, full-blown return to crippling alcoholism. In the gritty and sometimes grimly comic tradition of the bestselling memoirs Lit by Mary Karr and Smashed by Koren Zailckas, Drunk Mom is Bydlowska’s account of the ways substance abuse took control of her life—the binges and blackouts, the humiliations, the extraordinary risk-taking—as well as her fight toward recovery as a young mother. This courageous memoir brilliantly shines a light on the twisted logic of an addicted mind and the powerful, transformative love of one’s child. Ultimately it gives hope, especially to those struggling in the same way.

Baby, Mix Me a Drink

Baby, Mix Me a Drink PDF Author: Lisa Brown
Publisher: McSweeney's, Irregulars
ISBN: 9781932416459
Category : Bartending
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Humorous instruction manual teaches baby how to mix a martini, a margarita, a bloody Mary, an old-fashinoed, and a champagne cocktail.

Vintage Spirits and Forgotten Cocktails

Vintage Spirits and Forgotten Cocktails PDF Author: Ted Haigh
Publisher: Quarto Publishing Group USA
ISBN: 1616734752
Category : Cooking
Languages : en
Pages : 352

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Book Description
In this expanded and updated edition of Forgotten Cocktails and Vintage Spirits, historian, expert, and drink aficionado Dr. Cocktail adds another 20 fine recipes to his hand-picked collection of 80 rare-and-worth-rediscovered drink recipes, shares revelations about the latest cocktail trends, provides new resources for uncommon ingredients, and profiles of many of the cocktail world's movers and shakers. Historic facts, expanded anecdotes, and full-color vintage images from extremely uncommon sources round out this must-have volume. For anyone who enjoys an icy drink and an unforgettable tale.

What You Hide

What You Hide PDF Author: Natalie D. Richards
Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.
ISBN: 1492657190
Category : Young Adult Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 258

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Book Description
From Natalie D. Richards, the New York Times bestselling author of mystery books for teens, comes a pulse-pounding thriller about two teens who uncover something sinister, perfect for fans of Natasha Preston and Karen McManus. Mallory didn't want to leave home, but it wasn't safe to stay. So she sleeps at her best friend's house and spends the rest of her time at the library, doing her online schoolwork and figuring out what comes next. Because she's not going live in fear like her mother. Spencer volunteers at the library. Sure, it's community service for a stunt he pulled, but he likes the work. And it's the perfect escape from his parents' pressure to excel at school, at ice hockey, at everything. Especially after he meets Mallory. Then there is a tragic death at the library. Suddenly, what was once a sanctuary turns sinister. Ghostly footprints, strange scratching sounds, scrawled messages on bulletin boards and walls... Mallory and Spencer don't know who or what is responsible, but one thing is for sure: They are not as alone—or as safe—as they thought. Perfect for readers looking for: Detective stories for teens Creepy books for teens Edge-of-your-seat chills and thrills Praise for Natalie D. Richards: "As addictive as it is unpredictable. Natalie will keep you second guessing until the nail-biting end."—NATASHA PRESTON, New York Times bestselling author of The Cabin on My Secret to Tell "Brimming with suspense and intrigue."—MEGAN MIRANDA, New York Times bestselling author of All the Missing Girls on My Secret to Tell Also by Natalie D. Richards: Five Total Strangers Six Months Later Gone Too Far My Secret to Tell One Was Lost We All Fall Down

You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom

You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom PDF Author: Leslie Anne Bruce
Publisher: Seal Press
ISBN: 1580058914
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 238

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Book Description
A much-needed voice of encouragement for every woman who had a baby and lost her mind Sometimes, motherhood feels never-ending. A child is born, chaos ensues, and it seems like life will never return to normal. In You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom, award-winning journalist and Instagram star Leslie Anne Bruce acknowledges that, yes, motherhood is a total mind f*ck—but then she offers the self-empowerment lessons new mothers need to get through the psychic upheaval and emerge stronger than ever. After childbirth, a woman's body, her relationships, and her very sense of self are tested like never before. Bruce encourages readers to look past the sugarcoated truisms about the miracles of child-rearing in order to embrace the real joys of motherhood, spit-up stains and all. Loaded with unfettered support from a mom who has been through it all, You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom offers a lifeline of encouragement, inspiration, and community for the new mama who got a baby, lost her mind, and desperately wants to find herself again.

The Compleat Motherfucker

The Compleat Motherfucker PDF Author: Jim Dawson
Publisher: Feral House
ISBN: 1936239248
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 217

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Book Description
How this vulgar slang became a cultural archetype and the subject of Supreme Court rulings.

Mommy Cusses

Mommy Cusses PDF Author: Dorman Serena
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 1797206249
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 114

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Book Description
For fans of Go the F*ck to Sleep, Mommy Cusses is a hilarious novelty parenting book full of tell-it-like-it-is quotes, snarky lists, and too-true anecdotes that will resonate with new moms everywhere. For new-ish mothers who need to laugh at the absurdity of parenting so they don't cry, who are looking for a we're-in-this-together sense of solidarity, and who don't have time to read a "real" book, here is a hilarious and highly relatable collection of mom malarkey. There are real-talk quotes, helpful lists (such as "How to Look Like You Have Your Act Together"), "mom-tivities," and quizzes, all delivered with a healthy dose of sarcasm. Packaged in a handy trim size with colorful illustrations throughout, Mommy Cusses is the perfect gift for moms and moms-to-be who need some comic relief. • GREAT GIFT: Mommy Cusses is super relatable and laugh-out-loud funny, making it an easy gift for Mother's Day or a baby shower, or an anytime gift for a parent. • PERENNIAL TOPIC: It doesn't take long to experience all the ups and downs of parenting. Mommy Cusses features timeless mommy humor that won't go out of style and a fresh look and feel that speaks to young parents. Perfect for: • Expectant parents and parents of children under 5 • Shoppers looking for a baby shower or Mother's Day gift for a friend, spouse, or daughter • Followers of the Mommy Cusses blog or Instagram account

The Fruits Of His Labor

The Fruits Of His Labor PDF Author: John B. Davis
Publisher: Xlibris Corporation
ISBN: 1483642429
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 484

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Book Description
THE FRUITS OF HIS LABOR: The true story of Professor Edmond Jefferson Oliver, Principal of Fairfield Industrial High School, it's staff, it's students, community, state of Alabama, the Nation and the World!!! By John B. Davis, Class of 1951 Fruit results from planted seeds, when seeds grow, they bear fruit, Galations 5:22, 23 We were taught that the fruit that you have to reach for is the sweetest!! The fruits of his labor are many: the world is blessed with Fairfield Industrial High School (F.I.H.S.) graduates eschewing their accomplishments through serving others!! As one of our graduates, Lois Macon, eloquently proclaimed, "There was a place called FAIRFIELD INDUSTRIAL HIGH SCHOOL and a man named EDMOND JEFFERSON OLIVER and his vision was to educate the coloreds living in a colored community, children of colored parents who worked at colored jobs to send their colored children to a colored school. The visionary, Professor Oliver with head bloody, but unbowed still forged ahead. Each drop of blood in the sand, like living water produced living fruit, sprouting all around is evidence of his passion. He calls to the visionaries and awaits that army to understand that each child of mother F.I.H.S. also has a purpose; that each is, and that is will be is when he or she is!" We, the graduates of Fairfield Industrial High School, are the fruits of his labor and some of our stories are unfolded in this book. Like a plant, Professor Oliver's roots are showing. He grew good people in our small town with honesty, sincerity and dignity! Drop this book on the floor and where ever it opens, it will be excellent reading! This true story is dedicated to our BLACK Community (I choose to capitalize the word (BLACK), because of all the hell we caught and are still catching in this country)!