Author: Douglas Blankenship
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1477231889
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 649
Book Description
Imagine these endorsements The joke is on you if you dont buy this book. Jay Leno Blankenship has an uncanny sense of humor that crosses all boundaries of fun. Everyone will laugh hysterically at these jokes. David Letterman There is no doubt that this is the funniest collection of jokes ever - I say ever - compiled. Buy it! Jimmy Kimmel Laughter is a constant vacation. Take the best vacation of your life for less than thirty dollars. Mary Lou Whitty When I read this book, I must have laughed a thousand times. The humor here is global in perspective, and Douglas Blankenship is dead center with this book. It has to be a best seller, no doubt. Mary Lou Cook United States Marines
The Best Jokes I've Heard
Author: Douglas Blankenship
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1477231889
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 649
Book Description
Imagine these endorsements The joke is on you if you dont buy this book. Jay Leno Blankenship has an uncanny sense of humor that crosses all boundaries of fun. Everyone will laugh hysterically at these jokes. David Letterman There is no doubt that this is the funniest collection of jokes ever - I say ever - compiled. Buy it! Jimmy Kimmel Laughter is a constant vacation. Take the best vacation of your life for less than thirty dollars. Mary Lou Whitty When I read this book, I must have laughed a thousand times. The humor here is global in perspective, and Douglas Blankenship is dead center with this book. It has to be a best seller, no doubt. Mary Lou Cook United States Marines
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1477231889
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 649
Book Description
Imagine these endorsements The joke is on you if you dont buy this book. Jay Leno Blankenship has an uncanny sense of humor that crosses all boundaries of fun. Everyone will laugh hysterically at these jokes. David Letterman There is no doubt that this is the funniest collection of jokes ever - I say ever - compiled. Buy it! Jimmy Kimmel Laughter is a constant vacation. Take the best vacation of your life for less than thirty dollars. Mary Lou Whitty When I read this book, I must have laughed a thousand times. The humor here is global in perspective, and Douglas Blankenship is dead center with this book. It has to be a best seller, no doubt. Mary Lou Cook United States Marines
Best Jokes: I Have Ever Heard - 800 Jokes
Author: Manik Joshi
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781520112145
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 400
Book Description
It took me 20 years to compile 800 best jokes. You will find all sorts of jokes in this collection - Animal jokes, Aviation jokes, Baby jokes, Bar Jokes, Beauty jokes, Bicycle jokes, Bird jokes, Birthday jokes, Blind jokes, Blonde jokes, Bus jokes, Business jokes, Cannibal jokes, Children Jokes, College jokes, Computer jokes, Criminal jokes, Dead and dying jokes, Dentist jokes, Divorce jokes, Doctor jokes, Family jokes, Farmer jokes, Firefighter jokes, Food jokes, Gender Jokes, Hunting jokes, Husband and wife jokes, Internet jokes, Judge jokes, Kids' jokes, Lawyer jokes, Lotto jokes, Marriage jokes, Men jokes, Mental health jokes, Military jokes, Money jokes, Occupation Jokes, Office jokes, Old age jokes, Parent jokes, Police jokes, Political Jokes, Religious jokes, Salesmen jokes, School jokes, Women jokes And OthersSample This:001. Sign LanguageA group from Chicago spent a weekend gambling in Las Vegas. One of the men on that trip won $100,000. He didn't want anyone to know about it, so he decided not to return with the others, but took a later plane home - arriving back 3 a.m. He immediately went out to the backyard of his house, dug a hole and planted the money in it. The following morning he walked outside and found only an empty hole. He noticed footsteps leading from the hole to the house next door, which was owned by a deaf-mute. On the same street lived a professor who understood sign language and was a friend of the deaf man. Grabbing his pistol, the enraged man went to awaken the professor and dragged him to the deaf man's house. "You tell this guy that if he doesn't give me back my $100,000 I'm going to kill him!" he screamed at the professor. The professor conveyed the message to his friend, and his friend replied in sign language, "I hid it in my backyard, underneath the cherry tree." The professor turned to the man with the gun and said, "He's not going to tell you. He said he'd rather die first."***************002. Dead DogJoe was a steward for Fly High airlines. He watched as an older lady boarded the plane holding a dog in a cage. "Excuse me," said Joe "dogs are not allowed on board, you have to check it in with the baggage." The lady wasn't happy, but Joe was an experienced steward and succeeded in convincing the lady without much of a scene. Upon arrival, Joe took a peek in the cage, and to his great surprise, saw that the dog was dead! Frantic that they may get sued, Joe quickly sent one of his underlings out to town to buy a dog that looked exactly the same. Just in the nick of time the underling arrived with the dog. They quickly switched dogs and breathed a sigh of relief. "This isn't my dog!" said the lady as soon as she saw it. "I'm sure it is" insisted Joe "I was very careful about where I put it." "It's not my dog" argued the lady, "you see, I was bringing my dog to my home town to have him buried, and this dog is alive!"***************003. Magic TrickTwo thieves each sneak into a rich man's party. During dinner the thieves marveled at how even the cutlery was made of gold, and both decided they would try to steal some. The first thief quietly slipped a golden spoon into his pocket, unaware that the second thief had witnessed this crime. After dinner, the second thief comes up with a way to steal a golden spoon without suspicion being placed on him. He picks up a golden spoon identical to the first and holds it up in front of the party-goers explaining he wishes to show them a magic trick. "And now..." he speaks to the crowd and points towards the first thief, "I will put this spoon into my pocket, and remove it from this gentleman here's own pocket!"***************
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781520112145
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 400
Book Description
It took me 20 years to compile 800 best jokes. You will find all sorts of jokes in this collection - Animal jokes, Aviation jokes, Baby jokes, Bar Jokes, Beauty jokes, Bicycle jokes, Bird jokes, Birthday jokes, Blind jokes, Blonde jokes, Bus jokes, Business jokes, Cannibal jokes, Children Jokes, College jokes, Computer jokes, Criminal jokes, Dead and dying jokes, Dentist jokes, Divorce jokes, Doctor jokes, Family jokes, Farmer jokes, Firefighter jokes, Food jokes, Gender Jokes, Hunting jokes, Husband and wife jokes, Internet jokes, Judge jokes, Kids' jokes, Lawyer jokes, Lotto jokes, Marriage jokes, Men jokes, Mental health jokes, Military jokes, Money jokes, Occupation Jokes, Office jokes, Old age jokes, Parent jokes, Police jokes, Political Jokes, Religious jokes, Salesmen jokes, School jokes, Women jokes And OthersSample This:001. Sign LanguageA group from Chicago spent a weekend gambling in Las Vegas. One of the men on that trip won $100,000. He didn't want anyone to know about it, so he decided not to return with the others, but took a later plane home - arriving back 3 a.m. He immediately went out to the backyard of his house, dug a hole and planted the money in it. The following morning he walked outside and found only an empty hole. He noticed footsteps leading from the hole to the house next door, which was owned by a deaf-mute. On the same street lived a professor who understood sign language and was a friend of the deaf man. Grabbing his pistol, the enraged man went to awaken the professor and dragged him to the deaf man's house. "You tell this guy that if he doesn't give me back my $100,000 I'm going to kill him!" he screamed at the professor. The professor conveyed the message to his friend, and his friend replied in sign language, "I hid it in my backyard, underneath the cherry tree." The professor turned to the man with the gun and said, "He's not going to tell you. He said he'd rather die first."***************002. Dead DogJoe was a steward for Fly High airlines. He watched as an older lady boarded the plane holding a dog in a cage. "Excuse me," said Joe "dogs are not allowed on board, you have to check it in with the baggage." The lady wasn't happy, but Joe was an experienced steward and succeeded in convincing the lady without much of a scene. Upon arrival, Joe took a peek in the cage, and to his great surprise, saw that the dog was dead! Frantic that they may get sued, Joe quickly sent one of his underlings out to town to buy a dog that looked exactly the same. Just in the nick of time the underling arrived with the dog. They quickly switched dogs and breathed a sigh of relief. "This isn't my dog!" said the lady as soon as she saw it. "I'm sure it is" insisted Joe "I was very careful about where I put it." "It's not my dog" argued the lady, "you see, I was bringing my dog to my home town to have him buried, and this dog is alive!"***************003. Magic TrickTwo thieves each sneak into a rich man's party. During dinner the thieves marveled at how even the cutlery was made of gold, and both decided they would try to steal some. The first thief quietly slipped a golden spoon into his pocket, unaware that the second thief had witnessed this crime. After dinner, the second thief comes up with a way to steal a golden spoon without suspicion being placed on him. He picks up a golden spoon identical to the first and holds it up in front of the party-goers explaining he wishes to show them a magic trick. "And now..." he speaks to the crowd and points towards the first thief, "I will put this spoon into my pocket, and remove it from this gentleman here's own pocket!"***************
Pretty Good Joke Book
Author: Garrison Keillor
Publisher: Blackstone Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages :
Book Description
Over 2,200 Jokes from America’s favorite live radio show A treasury of hilarity from Garrison Keillor and the cast of public radio’s A Prairie Home Companion. A guy walks into a bar. Eight Canada Geese walk into a bar. A termite jumps up on the bar and asks, “Where is the bar tender?” Drum roll. The Sixth Edition of the perennially popular Pretty Good Joke Book is everything the first five were and more. More puns, one-liners, light bulb jokes, knock-knock jokes, and third-grader jokes (have you heard the one about Elvis Parsley?). More religion jokes, political jokes, lawyer jokes, blonde jokes, and jokes in questionable taste (Why did the urologist lose his license? He got in trouble with his peers). More jokes about chickens, relationships, and senior moments (the nice thing about Alzheimer’s is you can enjoy the same jokes again and again). It all started back in 1996, when A Prairie Home Companion fans laughed themselves silly during the first Joke Show. The broadcast was such a hit that it became an almost-annual gagfest. Then fans wanted to read the jokes, share them, and pass them around, and the first Pretty Good Joke Book was born. With over 200 new and updated jokes, the latest edition promises countless giggles, chortles, and guffaws anyone—fans of the radio show or not—will enjoy.
Publisher: Blackstone Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages :
Book Description
Over 2,200 Jokes from America’s favorite live radio show A treasury of hilarity from Garrison Keillor and the cast of public radio’s A Prairie Home Companion. A guy walks into a bar. Eight Canada Geese walk into a bar. A termite jumps up on the bar and asks, “Where is the bar tender?” Drum roll. The Sixth Edition of the perennially popular Pretty Good Joke Book is everything the first five were and more. More puns, one-liners, light bulb jokes, knock-knock jokes, and third-grader jokes (have you heard the one about Elvis Parsley?). More religion jokes, political jokes, lawyer jokes, blonde jokes, and jokes in questionable taste (Why did the urologist lose his license? He got in trouble with his peers). More jokes about chickens, relationships, and senior moments (the nice thing about Alzheimer’s is you can enjoy the same jokes again and again). It all started back in 1996, when A Prairie Home Companion fans laughed themselves silly during the first Joke Show. The broadcast was such a hit that it became an almost-annual gagfest. Then fans wanted to read the jokes, share them, and pass them around, and the first Pretty Good Joke Book was born. With over 200 new and updated jokes, the latest edition promises countless giggles, chortles, and guffaws anyone—fans of the radio show or not—will enjoy.
Stop Me If You've Heard This: A History and Philosophy of Jokes
Author: Jim Holt
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 0393069443
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 160
Book Description
“Finally I understand what it is I’ve been laughing at all these years.”—Jimmy Kimmel From the best-selling author of Why Does the World Exist? comes this outrageous, uproarious compendium of absurdity, filth, racy paradox, and gratuitous offensiveness—just the kind of mature philosophical reflection readers have come to expect from the ever-entertaining Jim Holt. Indeed, Stop Me If You’ve Heard This is the first book to trace the evolution of the joke all the way from the standup comics of ancient Athens to the comedy-club Seinfelds of today. After exploring humor’s history in Part One, Holt delves into philosophy in Part Two: Wall Street jokes; jokes about rednecks and atheists, bulimics and politicians; jokes you missed if you didn’t go to a Catholic girls’ school; jokes about logic and existence itself . . . all became fodder for the grand theories of Aristotle, Kant, Freud, and Wittgenstein in this heady mix of the high and low, of the ribald and profound, from America’s most beloved philosophical pundit.
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 0393069443
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 160
Book Description
“Finally I understand what it is I’ve been laughing at all these years.”—Jimmy Kimmel From the best-selling author of Why Does the World Exist? comes this outrageous, uproarious compendium of absurdity, filth, racy paradox, and gratuitous offensiveness—just the kind of mature philosophical reflection readers have come to expect from the ever-entertaining Jim Holt. Indeed, Stop Me If You’ve Heard This is the first book to trace the evolution of the joke all the way from the standup comics of ancient Athens to the comedy-club Seinfelds of today. After exploring humor’s history in Part One, Holt delves into philosophy in Part Two: Wall Street jokes; jokes about rednecks and atheists, bulimics and politicians; jokes you missed if you didn’t go to a Catholic girls’ school; jokes about logic and existence itself . . . all became fodder for the grand theories of Aristotle, Kant, Freud, and Wittgenstein in this heady mix of the high and low, of the ribald and profound, from America’s most beloved philosophical pundit.
The Mammoth Book of Really Silly Jokes
Author: Geoff Tibballs
Publisher: Robinson
ISBN: 1849017735
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 587
Book Description
The biggest and best collection of jokes for all the family to enjoy. 8,000 rib-ticklers, covering every subject under the sun from Aardvarks to Zombies, including chicken jokes, doctor-doctor jokes, elephant jokes, horror jokes, knock-knock jokes, excruciating puns, riddles, school jokes, sports jokes and waiter jokes. Most of the jokes are sharp one-liners but there is also a scattering of slightly longer stories.
Publisher: Robinson
ISBN: 1849017735
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 587
Book Description
The biggest and best collection of jokes for all the family to enjoy. 8,000 rib-ticklers, covering every subject under the sun from Aardvarks to Zombies, including chicken jokes, doctor-doctor jokes, elephant jokes, horror jokes, knock-knock jokes, excruciating puns, riddles, school jokes, sports jokes and waiter jokes. Most of the jokes are sharp one-liners but there is also a scattering of slightly longer stories.
The Laugh-a-Day Book of Bloopers, Quotes & Good Clean Jokes
Author: Jim Kraus
Publisher: Baker Books
ISBN: 0800720865
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 224
Book Description
A 365-day humor collection: each day includes a joke, a wacky church bulletin blooper, and a humorous quote.
Publisher: Baker Books
ISBN: 0800720865
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 224
Book Description
A 365-day humor collection: each day includes a joke, a wacky church bulletin blooper, and a humorous quote.
The Funniest Jokes You Never Heard
Author: Carbone
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781546780137
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 68
Book Description
Hilarious jokes you have never heard! Jokes for Adults that will make you laugh hard! You will have a wonderful time finally reading new sidesplitting jokes. Adult, very funny jokes that are fresh and hysterical. You will be the life of the party!
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781546780137
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 68
Book Description
Hilarious jokes you have never heard! Jokes for Adults that will make you laugh hard! You will have a wonderful time finally reading new sidesplitting jokes. Adult, very funny jokes that are fresh and hysterical. You will be the life of the party!
Speaking My Mind
Author: Ronald Reagan
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0743271114
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 436
Book Description
The most important speeches of America's "Great Communicator": Here, in his own words, is the record of Ronald Reagan's remarkable political career and historic eight-year presidency.
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0743271114
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 436
Book Description
The most important speeches of America's "Great Communicator": Here, in his own words, is the record of Ronald Reagan's remarkable political career and historic eight-year presidency.
Stuff Christians Like
Author: Jon Acuff
Publisher: Zondervan
ISBN: 0310110122
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 209
Book Description
Using the same humor and honesty that galvanized more than a million online readers from more than 200 countries, speaker Jon Acuff brings his insightful take on Christianity to the book world with this new edition of Stuff Christians Like. Do you constantly find yourself towing the fine line between praying before certain types of meals and not others? This book is for you. Have you fallen in love on a mission trip, just to break up when you get home? This book is for you. Are you a unicorn of purity who ranks honeymoon sex slightly higher than the second coming of Christ? Guess what – this book is for you, too. It’s time to shake off Somber Christian Syndrome and embrace the quirks of being a member of God’s kingdom. This book will teach you how to: Break up with your small group Subtly find out if your new Christian friends drink beer too Recognize the shame grenade that is a Jesus Juke Avoid a prayer handholding faux pas Say something Christian-y without looking like a snake handler From prayer shot blocks to metro worship leaders, no stone is left unturned in this hilarious look at faith. “I never knew how much I needed Jesus until I found out I was judging people who use the table of contents in their Bible. This book saved me from looking like a bad Christian.” – Sister Mary Francis, Rhode Island. “It’s such a time saver to know that my Chick-fil-a from the drive-thru comes pre-blessed. I always knew I was making the right choice by choosing the Lord’s chicken.” – Dave L., South Carolina.
Publisher: Zondervan
ISBN: 0310110122
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 209
Book Description
Using the same humor and honesty that galvanized more than a million online readers from more than 200 countries, speaker Jon Acuff brings his insightful take on Christianity to the book world with this new edition of Stuff Christians Like. Do you constantly find yourself towing the fine line between praying before certain types of meals and not others? This book is for you. Have you fallen in love on a mission trip, just to break up when you get home? This book is for you. Are you a unicorn of purity who ranks honeymoon sex slightly higher than the second coming of Christ? Guess what – this book is for you, too. It’s time to shake off Somber Christian Syndrome and embrace the quirks of being a member of God’s kingdom. This book will teach you how to: Break up with your small group Subtly find out if your new Christian friends drink beer too Recognize the shame grenade that is a Jesus Juke Avoid a prayer handholding faux pas Say something Christian-y without looking like a snake handler From prayer shot blocks to metro worship leaders, no stone is left unturned in this hilarious look at faith. “I never knew how much I needed Jesus until I found out I was judging people who use the table of contents in their Bible. This book saved me from looking like a bad Christian.” – Sister Mary Francis, Rhode Island. “It’s such a time saver to know that my Chick-fil-a from the drive-thru comes pre-blessed. I always knew I was making the right choice by choosing the Lord’s chicken.” – Dave L., South Carolina.
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids
Author: Rob Elliott
Publisher: Revell
ISBN: 0800788036
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 128
Book Description
A collection of one-liners, knock-knock jokes, and tongue twisters.
Publisher: Revell
ISBN: 0800788036
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 128
Book Description
A collection of one-liners, knock-knock jokes, and tongue twisters.