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Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Main Street Books
ISBN: 0307764621
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 242
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Book Description
A connoisseur's compendium of Freudian slips, spoonerisms, double-talk, and utter bosh from famous and infamous figures past and present -- a complete course in anti-eloquence by the foot-in-mouth champions of all time.
Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Main Street Books
ISBN: 0307764621
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 242
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Book Description
A connoisseur's compendium of Freudian slips, spoonerisms, double-talk, and utter bosh from famous and infamous figures past and present -- a complete course in anti-eloquence by the foot-in-mouth champions of all time.
Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0060950595
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 244
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Book Description
For the many readers still laughing from The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said, here are 776 even stupider quotes overheard around the world.
Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 0307800954
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 231
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Book Description
The creme de la crud of screen history "War! War! That's all you think of, Dick Plantagenet! You burner! You pillager!" --Virginia Mayo as Lady Edith to George Sanders in King Richard and the Crusaders (1954) "Visits? That would indicate visitors." --Army captain learning of alien visits in Plan 9 from Outer Space (1959) "When I'm sitting here with you, I don't even think about the slime people." --Hero to heroine in The Slime People (1962) "Suck the coffin mushroom now." --The Ultimate Vampire (1991) "This is bad." --Leonardo DiCaprio as the you-know-what hits the you-know-what in Titanic (1997)
Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 0307417611
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 305
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Book Description
A hilarious collection of lists, statistics, news items, quotations, and facts detailing stupid acts of Americans from all walks of life—by the authors of the bestselling The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said Everyone knows that America is “the land of the free and the home of the brave,” but sometimes that means we’re free to be as bravely stupid as we want! In Unusually Stupid Americans, Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras assemble choice bits of stupidity, U.S.A.-style, including •the top seriously flawed American advertising moments, including Pacific Airlines’ brilliant “You’re scared of flying? So’s our pilot!” ad campaign, which led the airline to bankruptcy within two months of the campaign’s inception •the Martin Luther King, Jr., celebration in Florida, where a plaque was un-veiled that was intended to honor the actor James Earl Jones but instead read, “Thank you James Earl Ray for keeping the dream alive” (an unfortunate slip-up, as James Earl Ray was King’s assassin) •and much more!
Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Vintage
ISBN: 0679776222
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 145
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Book Description
Writing very bad poetry requires talent. It helps to have a wooden ear for words, a penchant for sinking into a mire of sentimentality, and an enviable confidence that allows one to write despite absolutely appalling incompetence. The 131 poems collected in this first-of-its-kind anthology are so glaringly awful that they embody a kind of genius. From Fred Emerson Brooks' "The Stuttering Lover" to Matthew Green's "The Spleen" to Georgia Bailey Parrington's misguided "An Elegy to a Dissected Puppy", they mangle meter, run rampant over rhyme, and bludgeon us into insensibility with their grandiosity, anticlimax, and malapropism. Guaranteed to move even the most stoic reader to tears (of laughter), Very Bad Poetry is sure to become a favorite of the poetically inclined (and disinclined).
Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Main Street Books
ISBN: 9780385483414
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 212
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Book Description
From the authors of The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said comes a sidesplitting collection of inane incidents, senseless stunts, farcical feats, and utterly asinine activities from thoughout history and around the globe. A nonstop barrage of belly laughs, this comic compendium offers conclusive proof that actions speak louder--and funnier--than words.
Author: A.J. Adams
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 0740797794
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 258
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Book Description
Service workers share their funniest and most cringeworthy stories of difficult, demanding, and just plain mind-boggling encounters with the public . . . “Ma’am, the rules clearly state that you cannot have any liquids over 3.4 ounces in your carry-on. If you’d like to, you could—” “But that’s not a liquid!” “Excuse me, ma’am?” “It’s not a liquid! It’s water!” Retailers, restaurants, and tech support providers believe service is king, but in The Customer Is Not Always Right, A.J. Adams proves that customers will do anything they can to put that motto to the test. Enjoy tales from the creator of the popular website Not Always Right, including half that are previously unpublished, showcasing customer-relations horror stories everyone can relate to. No matter what side of the counter you’re on, there are hilarious accounts about everything that can go wrong between the customer and retail or service provider. Whether it's a confrontation in the drive-through over not enough fries or arguing over a one-cent price difference on milk, this book proves the principle of “the customer is always right” can be dead wrong.
Author: Umesh Ramakrishnan
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 9781591842255
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 260
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Book Description
"Would you like to have a series of lunch dates with the world's top CEOs? A chance to pick the brains of the people who run Aetna, Cadbury Schweppes, Coca-Cola, Charles Schwab, Starbucks, Dell, Fidelity, NCR, and dozens of other companies? You probably can't get that kind of access to leading C-suite executives, but Umesh Ramakrishnan can - and he shares what they told him in this unique book."--BOOK JACKET.
Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 0761165916
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 242
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Book Description
Presents a series of humorous lists on such topics as things to say to an alien, least complimentary compliments, and impossible-to-follow instructions.
Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 0307498492
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 274
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Book Description
The Greeks honored Zeus, the Romans revered Juno, but modern civilization worships a different sort of god: Celebrity. Face it, we follow the stars’ every move, fashion choice, and deliciously dishy affairs. Now Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras, authors of Unusually Stupid Americans, pull the demanding divas, screwball stars, and celebu-twits off their pedestals–and prove it doesn’t take a degree in rocket science to become famous. Cases in point: • Courtney Love misses an important court date relating to “possession of a controlled substance” because she can’t find a professional bodyguard at the last minute. • Mariah Carey’s entourage includes a skirt-from-touching-floor specialist, a towel hand-off person, and a professional drink holder/lifter. • Savvy traveler Paris Hilton concludes that all of Europe is, “like, French.” • Mensa candidate and rocker Tommy Lee is pretty sure that Winston Churchill was president during the Civil War, that the numeric equivalent of pi is “the two-equals-MC-squared thing,” and that an isosceles triangle is “somewhere in Bermuda.” Feuds, faith, family, money, sex, tantrums, travel–no star-studded stone is left unturned. Filled with jaw-dropping anecdotes, quirky quotes, and special stupid-celebrity awards, Unusually Stupid Celebrities provides a red-faced glimpse of the red carpet.
