Moms Who Drink and Swear

Moms Who Drink and Swear PDF Author: Nicole Knepper
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 110165094X
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 337

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Book Description
If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. This irreverant, hilarious guide to the trials of motherhood makes the perfect gift for mom—or any woman with a huge heart and a mouth that sometimes needs washing out with soap. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.

Moms Who Drink and Swear

Moms Who Drink and Swear PDF Author: Nicole Knepper
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 110165094X
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 337

Get Book Here

Book Description
If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. This irreverant, hilarious guide to the trials of motherhood makes the perfect gift for mom—or any woman with a huge heart and a mouth that sometimes needs washing out with soap. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.

My Mom Is a Foreigner, But Not to Me

My Mom Is a Foreigner, But Not to Me PDF Author: Julianne Moore
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 1452129754
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 50

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Book Description
“Moore captures the children’s complicated mix of feelings: embarrassment, defiance, pride, appreciation and, most palpably, love.” —The New York Times Academy Award–winning actress and New York Times–bestselling author of the Freckleface Strawberry series Julianne Moore pays homage to all the Muttis, Mammas, and Mamans who are from another country. A foreign mom may eat, speak, and dress differently than other moms—she may wear special clothes for holidays, twist hair in strange old-fashioned braids, and cook recipes passed down from grandma. Such a mom may be different than other moms, but . . . she is also clearly the best! Vividly illustrated by Meilo So, this funny and heartwarming picture book about growing up in multiple cultures celebrates the diverse world in which we live.

Swearing Like a Motherfucking Lawyer

Swearing Like a Motherfucking Lawyer PDF Author: Colorful Swearing Dreams
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781080844821
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 48

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Book Description
GAG GIFT IDEA - SWEAR WORD COLORING BOOK FOR GROWN-UPS This is an Adult Coloring Book of 20 Hilarious Lawyer Related Swearing Words and Relaxing Designs where men, women, advocates who can relief their stress by coloring & without cussing out loud! FOR ADULT ONLY. Cover Soft Silky Matte Cover Size 8.5 x 11 inches (21.59 x 27.94 cm) Features 20 Unique & Relaxing Designs to Color for Adult Only This Coloring book Contains 20 hilarious Uncensored Swear Words (including F-words, C-words, etc.) Each Swear word is designed around Mandalas, Paisley Patterns, Flowers & more Each Coloring Page is designed for Laughing, Relaxing & Passing Time The Variety of Designs offer something for every skill level Your choice of coloring tools can be used (Gel Pens, Colored Pencils, Markers, Crayons, etc.) Each Coloring Page is Printed on One Side of white paper for best results. Examples of Cuss Words you can find in this Coloring Book "It Takes a Big Heart to Win Cases for Dipshits" "Clients Think "It's not my Fault", Lawyers Think "Zero Fucks Given"" "Verdict time, You Better Pray Motherfuckers" and more! These coloring books are the best funny gag gift ideas for White Elephant, Retirement, Birthdays, Christmas for social workers moms, dads, coworkers, colleagues, etc. Unleash your inner artist as you color this therapeutic antistress coloring book, perfect for getting rid of negative feelings & staying stress-free. TIME TO COLOR THE STRESS AWAY

You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom

You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom PDF Author: Leslie Anne Bruce
Publisher: Seal Press
ISBN: 1580058914
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 238

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Book Description
A much-needed voice of encouragement for every woman who had a baby and lost her mind Sometimes, motherhood feels never-ending. A child is born, chaos ensues, and it seems like life will never return to normal. In You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom, award-winning journalist and Instagram star Leslie Anne Bruce acknowledges that, yes, motherhood is a total mind f*ck—but then she offers the self-empowerment lessons new mothers need to get through the psychic upheaval and emerge stronger than ever. After childbirth, a woman's body, her relationships, and her very sense of self are tested like never before. Bruce encourages readers to look past the sugarcoated truisms about the miracles of child-rearing in order to embrace the real joys of motherhood, spit-up stains and all. Loaded with unfettered support from a mom who has been through it all, You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom offers a lifeline of encouragement, inspiration, and community for the new mama who got a baby, lost her mind, and desperately wants to find herself again.

Travellin' Mama: A Parent's Guide to Ditching the Routine, Seeing the World, and Taking the Kids Along for the Ride

Travellin' Mama: A Parent's Guide to Ditching the Routine, Seeing the World, and Taking the Kids Along for the Ride PDF Author: Nancy Harper
Publisher: Travellin' Mama
ISBN: 1937572277
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 226

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Book Description
A lighthearted guide to long-haul travel with children...from a mom who knows best.

The Cursing Mommy's Book of Days

The Cursing Mommy's Book of Days PDF Author: Ian Frazier
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux
ISBN: 0374709491
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 254

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Book Description
Based on his widely read columns for The New Yorker, Ian Frazier's uproarious first novel, The Cursing Mommy's Book of Days, centers on a profoundly memorable character, sprung from an impressively fertile imagination. Structured as a daybook of sorts, the book follows the Cursing Mommy—beleaguered wife of Larry and mother of two boys, twelve and eight—as she tries (more or less) valiantly to offer tips on how to do various tasks around the home, only to end up on the ground, cursing, surrounded by broken glass. Her voice is somewhere between Phyllis Diller's and Sylvia Plath's: a hilariously desperate housewife with a taste for swearing and large glasses of red wine, who speaks to the frustrations of everyday life. Frazier has demonstrated an astonishing ability to operate with ease in a variety of registers: from On the Rez, an investigation into the lives of modern day Oglala Sioux written with a mix of humor, compassion, and imagination, to Dating Your Mom, a sidesplitting collection of humorous essays that imagines, among other things, how and why you might begin a romance with your mother. Here, Frazier tackles another genre with his usual grace and aplomb, as well as an extra helping of his trademark wicked wit. The Cursing Mommy's failures and weaknesses are our own—and Frazier gives them a loving, satirical spin that is uniquely his own.

The Third Messiah

The Third Messiah PDF Author: Christopher West
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 0312276303
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 277

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Book Description
Anzhuang Wang, a detective in the Beijing police department, starts investigating a cult - the New Church of the Heavenly Kingdom - when his sister-in-law "Julie" gets involved with the group. The church has ties that lead back to the 19th century Taiping Rebellion and maintains a strictly non-political stance. Still, given the current climate in Beijing, the recent crackdown on the Fa Lun Gong, and the current initiation from above against nuisance crime, there is much about the situation to make Wang nervous. As a cloud of death and danger begins to surround the church, Wang must now find a way to protect his family, defy the pressure from somewhere high above him in the party structure, and uncover the truth before it is too late.

All I know

All I know PDF Author: Marita van der Vyver
Publisher: Penguin Random House South Africa
ISBN: 0799395773
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 189

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Book Description
A truly South African story about a struggling father-and-son relationship and the healing power of words. Van der Vyver writes convincingly about the world of performance poetry and Gabriel’s desperate attempts to make sense of life’s challenges after the death of his mom.

Mommies Who Drink

Mommies Who Drink PDF Author: Brett Paesel
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
ISBN: 0446506214
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 336

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Book Description
For young single women, every night is Ladies' Night. For Brett Paesel and her friends, Friday happy hour is all they get--if they can wrangle a babysitter. Like most mommies, they support each other through pregnancies, sleep deprivation, and the need to talk about it all. Instead of meeting at the playground, they convene at the local watering hole while sipping Black and Tans and flirting with the cute bartender. With a poignant voice and a fresh style that makes this memoir read like the best women's fiction, Paesel navigates mommyhood in all its forms--the ecstatic, the terrifying, the tedious, the hilarious, the transcendental, and the sticky. Paesel's laugh-out-loud perspective will appeal to all women who are braving the new world of motherhood, where the secret question on their minds at playgroup is "When is it too early in the day to start drinking?"

Love, Sex and Respect

Love, Sex and Respect PDF Author: Jeffrey Rubin
Publisher: Lulu.com
ISBN: 1300853301
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 320

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Book Description
Jeff Star appears to have found the road to respect at his high school, that is, until he enters the realm of the dating scene. There, the clash between love, sex and respect has even led his heroic buddy, "Cool Steve," into a deep, dark depression. And when a nearby violent gang repeatedly humiliates the local female teenagers, the guys turn to Steve to lead a war council confrontation.