Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Stories

Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Stories PDF Author: Editors of Readers Digest
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1621454827
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 261

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Book Description
The Editors of Reader’s Digest present a hilarious collection of dumb people doing dumb things. Every day in America we are bombarded by stupidity; sometimes we just shake our heads, but most of the time we get a good laugh out of the really dumb things people do and say. In this collection of dumb stories we poke a little fun at the unbelievably dumb things that happen in our lives and have a good chuckle along the way. You’re a dumb criminal if…you’re not picky about your office locations. Christopher Exley of Everett, Washington, was arrested for conducting a drug deal over the phone—in the bathroom of the Everett Police Department. During my brother-in-law’s first performance review, his boss said, “I’m not quite sure what it is you do here. But whatever it is, could you do it faster?” --Jeanie Waara, Philip, SD In an attempt to balance work and motherhood, I delegated the grocery shopping to my young babysitter. But the job proved a tad daunting. One day while I was at work, she texted me from the supermarket. “Can’t find Brillo pads,” she wrote. “All they have are Tampax and Kotex.” --Kimberly Clark, Alpharetta, GA I overheard an elderly gentleman tell his friend that he couldn’t meet him the next day because he had to go to the hospital for an autopsy. His friend was sympathetic: “I had one of those last year. Luckily it wasn’t serious.” --Tracy Moralee, Hitchin, Great Britain

Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Stories

Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Stories PDF Author: Editors of Readers Digest
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1621454827
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 261

Get Book Here

Book Description
The Editors of Reader’s Digest present a hilarious collection of dumb people doing dumb things. Every day in America we are bombarded by stupidity; sometimes we just shake our heads, but most of the time we get a good laugh out of the really dumb things people do and say. In this collection of dumb stories we poke a little fun at the unbelievably dumb things that happen in our lives and have a good chuckle along the way. You’re a dumb criminal if…you’re not picky about your office locations. Christopher Exley of Everett, Washington, was arrested for conducting a drug deal over the phone—in the bathroom of the Everett Police Department. During my brother-in-law’s first performance review, his boss said, “I’m not quite sure what it is you do here. But whatever it is, could you do it faster?” --Jeanie Waara, Philip, SD In an attempt to balance work and motherhood, I delegated the grocery shopping to my young babysitter. But the job proved a tad daunting. One day while I was at work, she texted me from the supermarket. “Can’t find Brillo pads,” she wrote. “All they have are Tampax and Kotex.” --Kimberly Clark, Alpharetta, GA I overheard an elderly gentleman tell his friend that he couldn’t meet him the next day because he had to go to the hospital for an autopsy. His friend was sympathetic: “I had one of those last year. Luckily it wasn’t serious.” --Tracy Moralee, Hitchin, Great Britain

Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Jokes

Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Jokes PDF Author: Reader's Digest
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1621454452
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 216

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Book Description
Is your dad funny? Is he funny looking? Just kidding. In the Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Jokes we have compiled some of the funniest jokes, riddles, and one-liners that can be shared across generations, around the dinner table or the campfire. Truly, there's something for everyone from 6 to 106. "Knock! Knock! Who's there? Justin. Justin who? Justin the neighborhood and thought I'd come over." Most dads get their best material from their families. And that's what we have here: a collection of riddles, jokes, one-liners, hilarious anecdotes and pointed wit that see families for what they truly are--our chief source of amusement! Reader's Digest has a long tradition of providing our readers with laughter through our many columns in the magazine. This collection is pulled right from that humorous source. "Did you hear that NASA has launched several cows into orbit? It was the herd shot around the world!"

The Dumb Book

The Dumb Book PDF Author: Editors of Readers Digest
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1621451496
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 214

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Book Description
The old adage truth is stranger than fiction can also be construed as truth is funnier than fiction and we see no shortage of real people doing and saying dumb things and making us laugh in the process. The Editors of Reader’s Digest present a hilarious collection of dumb people doing dumb things. Every day in America we are bombarded by stupidity; sometimes we just shake our heads, but most of the time we get a good laugh out of the really dumb things people do and say. In our first collection of dumb stories we poke a little fun at the unbelievably dumb things that happen in our lives and have a good chuckle along the way. “You’re a dumb criminal if…You’re not picky about your office locations. Christopher Exley of Everett, Washington, was arrested for conducting a drug deal over the phone—in the bathroom of the Everett Police Department.” “During my brother-in-law’s first performance review, his boss said, “I’m not quite sure what it is you do here. But whatever it is, could you do it faster?” --Jeanie Waara, Philip, SD “In an attempt to balance work and motherhood, I delegated the grocery shopping to my young babysitter. But the job proved a tad daunting. One day while I was at work, she texted me from the supermarket. “Can’t find Brillo pads,” she wrote. “All they have are Tampax and Kotex.” --Kimberly Clark, Alpharetta, GA “I overheard an elderly gentleman tell his friend that he couldn’t meet him the next day because he had to go to the hospital for an autopsy. His friend was sympathetic: “I had one of those last year. Luckily it wasn’t serious.” --Tracy Moralee, Hitchin, Great Britain

Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids vol 3

Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids vol 3 PDF Author: Reader's Digest
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1621455092
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 90

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Book Description
Loaded with knock knock jokes, riddles, one liners, tongue twisters and puns, Fun Jokes for Funny Kids Vol. 3 will give kids hours of new material. They will keep their friends and family rolling in laughter. Perfect for kids 6-12. Knock knock jokes, riddles, tongue twisters, one liners and puns gauranteed to make your kids -and you- laugh out loud. Icon's for Alexa's Favorites denote her hand picked, favorite jokes. Alexa, a real life 4th grader from new York who loves telling jokes, is our resident guest editor!

Reader's Digest Laughter is the Best Medicine: All Time Favorites

Reader's Digest Laughter is the Best Medicine: All Time Favorites PDF Author: Reader's Digest
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1621455971
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 328

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Book Description
A hilarious collection of the funniest family-friendly jokes, quotes, stories, cartoons, and anecdotes from the past 100 years of Reader’s Digest magazine. A little chuckle every day will keep the doctor away. Editors have mined the Reader’s Digest archives to bring you Laughter Is the Best Medicine, All-Time Favorites, a collection of the most hilarious jokes and anecdotes we’ve come across over the years. As you turn the pages of our newest collection, you’ll realize once again that laughter is always the best medicine. If evolution really works, how come mothers have only two hands? –Milton Berle The game card said: “Name three wars.” My teenage daughter’s response: “Civil War, Revolutionary War, and Star Wars.” Keep your temper. Nobody wants it. –Dearborn Independent Check out this billion-dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell, “I’m just cooking!” Anthropologists have discovered a 50-million-year-old human skull with three perfectly preserved teeth intact. They're not sure, but they think it may be the remains of the very first hockey player. –Jay Leno This collection of laugh-out-loud, clean jokes, one-liners, and other lighthearted glimpses of life—drawn from Reader’s Digest magazine’s most popular humor columns—is sure to tickle the funny bone. Packed with cartoons, quotes, quips, and stories contributed by professional comedians, joke writers, and readers of the magazine, this side-splitting compilation pokes fun at the facts and foibles of daily routines, illustrating that life is often funnier than fiction.

Dad's Big Idea

Dad's Big Idea PDF Author: Jill Goldowsky
Publisher: Reader's Digest Children's Books
ISBN: 9780794402259
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 36

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Book Description
A boy and his friends like to make noise when they get together, but when his father is worried they will wake the baby, he helps them build a tree house to play in.

Readers Digest Funny Family Jokes

Readers Digest Funny Family Jokes PDF Author: Editors at Reader's Digest
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1621451909
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 262

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Book Description
In the Reader's Digest Funny Family Jokes we have compiled some of the funniest jokes, riddles, and one-liners that can be shared across generations, around the dinner table or the campfire. Truly, there's something for everyone from 9 to 99. "Knock! Knock! Who's there? Justin. Justin who? Justin the neighborhood and thought I'd come over." Reader's Digest has a long tradition of providing our readers with laughter through our many humor features. In the Reader's Digest Funny Family Jokes we have compiled some of the funniest jokes, riddles, and one-liners that can be shared across generations, around the dinner table or the campfire. Truly, there's something for everyone from 9 to 99. We hope you and your family will take the time to read, share and laugh together. Did you hear that NASA has launched several cows into orbit? It was the herd shot around the world.

Best of Reader's Digest Vol 3 -Celebrating 100 Years

Best of Reader's Digest Vol 3 -Celebrating 100 Years PDF Author: Reader's Digest
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1621458415
Category : Literary Collections
Languages : en
Pages : 387

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Book Description
From heartwarming and humorous stories about community, pets, and family to insightful essays from influential writers and stirring accounts of everyday heroes, The Best of Reader’s Digest will inspire you, amuse you, and always remind you of the good in humanity. This impressive collection contains the very best of 100 years of Reader’s Digest stories. The book is brimming with inspiring tales about family and society, funny takes on human nature, and poignant personal accounts of important cultural events and historical eras. With essays from influential writers and entertainers nestled alongside remarkable tales about everyday heroes, this volume is sure to have something for everyone. You’ll laugh, learn, reflect, and be inspired by the diverse stories, including: *Queens of the Road: An adult daughter reflects upon the humorous, occasionally exasperating exchanges she has with her mother while they “enjoy” long road trips together; she offers tongue-in-cheek and witty advice to those looking to do the same. *I Get a Lot More Than I Give: Entertainer and USO legend Bob Hope gives a touching firsthand account of performing for GIs at Christmastime in Vietnam, describes the valuable life lessons he’s learned in the process, and shares emotional memories of encounters with wounded soldiers. *Fire Lover: Writer Joseph Wambaugh delivers a page-turning account of the investigation into a series of California arsons that occurred in the 1980s. Now-infamous arson investigator John Orr intimately participates in the case, but he’s ultimately revealed to be the arsonist in question. *Why We Forgive: In an intimate essay, revered activist and theologian Desmond Tutu meditates on the value of forgiveness. Recalling the physical and verbal abuse his father inflicted upon his family, Tutu acknowledges that forgiveness can be difficult but reminds readers that “the only way to experience healing and peace is to forgive.” *A Fight for Life at 35,000 Feet: When 35-year-old Theresa de Bara goes into premature labor in the middle of a flight, the crew and passengers have no choice but to jump to action. This dramatic and suspenseful account describes the efforts of two paramedics and a doctor on board to ensure the safety and health of Theresa and her baby. In addition, the book features hilarious jokes and cartoons, classic illustrations and photographs, and true stories from readers like you.

Don Quixote, U. S. A.

Don Quixote, U. S. A. PDF Author: Richard Powell
Publisher: Bantam Books
ISBN:
Category : Don Quixote (Fictitious character)
Languages : en
Pages : 296

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Book Description
Insignificant Peace Corps man, sent to promote banana culture on a Caribbean island, rises to great heights of public favor despite being trapped between two conflicting factions.

The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes

The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes PDF Author: Jeremy Brown
Publisher: Media Lab Books
ISBN: 9781948174732
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 176

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Book Description
From giving as good as he got at the Harvard Lampoon to his comedic work in such films and TV shows as Donovan’s Reef, North to Alaska, Rowan & Martin’s Laugh-In, I Love Lucy, Dean Martin Celebrity Roast and The Red Skelton Hour, John Wayne was never shy about exhibiting his wry, knowing sense of humor. It’s this facet of Duke that The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes captures. A father of six children himself, Duke was no stranger to making kids crack up (or at least trying to). This book presents those stories of Duke as practical joker as well as willing victim, embedded within more than 400 clever, yet dreadful jokes, stories, riddles and puns, perfect for family members of every age. Some of the jokes are Duke- and Western-themed, but most are simply good, original Dad jokes: some good, some bad, some awful, but all funny. Readers will also find inside nearly three dozen fun photos of Duke exhibiting his good humor for all to see, laughing with his kids or fellow actors on set and behind the scenes, making this book a treasure for fans and fathers alike.