To Have and to Hold

To Have and to Hold PDF Author: Molly Millwood, PhD
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0062838687
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 287

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Book Description
A clinical psychologist’s exploration of the modern dilemmas women face in the wake of new motherhood When Molly Millwood became a mother, she was fully prepared for what she would gain: an adorable baby boy; hard-won mothering skills; and a messy, chaotic, beautiful life. But what she did not expect was what she would lose: aspects of her identity, a baseline level of happiness, a general sense of wellbeing. And though she had the benefit of a supportive husband during this transition, she also at times resented the fact that the disruption to his life seemed to pale in comparison to hers. As a clinical psychologist, Molly knew her experience was a normal response to a life-changing event. But without the advantage of such a perspective, many of the patients she treated in her private practice grappled with self-doubt, guilt, and fear, and suffered the dual pain of not only the struggle to adjust but also the overwhelming shame for struggling at all. In To Have and to Hold, Molly explores the complex terrain of new motherhood, illuminating the ways it affects women psychologically, emotionally, physically, and professionally—as well as how it impacts their partnership. Along with the arrival of a bundle of joy come thorny issues such as self-worth, control, autonomy, and dependency. And for most new mothers, these issues are experienced within the context of an intimate relationship, adding another layer of tension, conflict, and confusion to an already challenging time. As Molly examines the inextricable link between women’s well-being as new mothers and the well-being of their relationships, she offers guidance to help readers reclaim their identities, overcome their guilt and shame, and repair their relationships. A blend of personal narrative, scientific research, and stories from Molly’s clinical practice, To Have and to Hold provides a much-needed lifeline to new mothers everywhere.

To Have and to Hold

To Have and to Hold PDF Author: Molly Millwood, PhD
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0062838687
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 287

Get Book Here

Book Description
A clinical psychologist’s exploration of the modern dilemmas women face in the wake of new motherhood When Molly Millwood became a mother, she was fully prepared for what she would gain: an adorable baby boy; hard-won mothering skills; and a messy, chaotic, beautiful life. But what she did not expect was what she would lose: aspects of her identity, a baseline level of happiness, a general sense of wellbeing. And though she had the benefit of a supportive husband during this transition, she also at times resented the fact that the disruption to his life seemed to pale in comparison to hers. As a clinical psychologist, Molly knew her experience was a normal response to a life-changing event. But without the advantage of such a perspective, many of the patients she treated in her private practice grappled with self-doubt, guilt, and fear, and suffered the dual pain of not only the struggle to adjust but also the overwhelming shame for struggling at all. In To Have and to Hold, Molly explores the complex terrain of new motherhood, illuminating the ways it affects women psychologically, emotionally, physically, and professionally—as well as how it impacts their partnership. Along with the arrival of a bundle of joy come thorny issues such as self-worth, control, autonomy, and dependency. And for most new mothers, these issues are experienced within the context of an intimate relationship, adding another layer of tension, conflict, and confusion to an already challenging time. As Molly examines the inextricable link between women’s well-being as new mothers and the well-being of their relationships, she offers guidance to help readers reclaim their identities, overcome their guilt and shame, and repair their relationships. A blend of personal narrative, scientific research, and stories from Molly’s clinical practice, To Have and to Hold provides a much-needed lifeline to new mothers everywhere.

Uneasy Possessions

Uneasy Possessions PDF Author: Katharine Ann Jensen
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781611490381
Category : Literary Criticism
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
In Uneasy Possessions: The Mother-Daughter Dilemma in French Women's Writings, 1671-1928, Katharine Ann Jensen analyzes the work of five major French women writers, discovering a four-century pattern of mother-daughter relationships marked by domination, submission, and conflict. This groundbreaking study explores work of Marie-Madeleine de Lafayette, Marie de S vign , Elisabeth Vig e Lebrun, George Sand, and Colette, providing a new reading of women's history and offering a new understanding of female psychology. Jensen argues that conflict between the mothers and daughters depicted in these texts was the result of two contradictory ideologies. In order to pass proper feminine behavior on to their daughters, mothers were encouraged to construe daughters as part of themselves, even as daughters were expected to adopt their mothers' wishes as their own. At the same time, a developing individualism created a conflict between the daughter's desire for autonomy and her mother's wish to be recognized for having raised a perfect daughter-alter ego. Despite vast changes in social organization in France over the four centuries of this study, the mother-daughter ideology remained effectively the same. To keep their daughters virgins, mothers were expected to form their daughters in their own image-as a mirror reflection. Mother-daughter reflectivity extended even into the marriage bed, as daughters were taught to remain faithful and to submit to (male) authority throughout their lives. Thus, the daughter's sexuality was channeled into producing legitimate offspring while the mother's ambition was confined to working on her daughter, rather than focused on creating cultural works that might compete with men's. Mothers were rewarded with the narcissistic satisfaction of viewing their filial creations as a socially sanctioned work of art: daughters thus functioned as possessions.

Feminism and Motherhood in Western Europe, 1890–1970

Feminism and Motherhood in Western Europe, 1890–1970 PDF Author: A. Allen
Publisher: Springer
ISBN: 1403981434
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 363

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Book Description
According to Allen, motherhood and citizenship are terms that are closely linked and have been redefined over the past century due to changes in women's status, feminist movements, and political developments. Mother-child relationships were greatly affected by political decisions during the early 1900s, and the maternal role has been transformed over the years. To understand the dilemmas faced by women concerning motherhood and work, for example, Allen argues that the problem must be examined in terms of its demographic and political development through history. Allen highlights the feminist movements in Western Europe - primarily Britain, France, Germany and the Netherlands, and explores the implications of the maternal role for women's aspirations to the rights of citizenship. Among the topics Allen explores the history of the maternal role, psychoanalysis and theories on the mother-child relationship, changes in family law from 1890-1914, the economic status of mothers, and reproductive responsibility.

The Mother of All Dilemmas

The Mother of All Dilemmas PDF Author: Kathleen Guthrie Woods
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781737304814
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :

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Book Description
"You really should have kids." Hurtling toward 40-and still single and longing for children of her own-Kathleen doesn't need to be reminded that time is running out for her to turn her dreams for a family into reality. So she starts to consider a Plan B: becoming a single parent. But can she do it all on her own? And does she really want to? If only I could try it out, she thinks. For wouldn't an internship as a single mommy help her make major life decisions? And then?.In an open, thoughtful, and sometimes hilarious memoir, Kathleen shares what she learns while caring for her 15-month-old nephew, Jake, while his parents travel. With Jake, she experiences the realities of single parenthood, including a taste of the loving affection she craves, fierce tantrums that test her best aunting skills, moments of bliss amidst exploding poopy diapers and ongoing sleep deprivation, and ah-hahs that have her questioning whether she has wasted her life.And that's just the start of her journey. Back at home, she unpacks and examines the societal baggage that led her to believe a woman's only true value is as a mother. Empowered by her experience, research, and introspection, she learns to embrace the different paths women choose, including the one she ultimately chooses for herself.

Motherhood

Motherhood PDF Author: Sheila Heti
Publisher: Henry Holt and Company
ISBN: 1627790780
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 305

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Book Description
From the author of How Should a Person Be? (“one of the most talked-about books of the year”—Time Magazine) and the New York Times Bestseller Women in Clothes comes a daring novel about whether to have children. In Motherhood, Sheila Heti asks what is gained and what is lost when a woman becomes a mother, treating the most consequential decision of early adulthood with the candor, originality, and humor that have won Heti international acclaim and made How Should A Person Be? required reading for a generation. In her late thirties, when her friends are asking when they will become mothers, the narrator of Heti’s intimate and urgent novel considers whether she will do so at all. In a narrative spanning several years, casting among the influence of her peers, partner, and her duties to her forbearers, she struggles to make a wise and moral choice. After seeking guidance from philosophy, her body, mysticism, and chance, she discovers her answer much closer to home. Motherhood is a courageous, keenly felt, and starkly original novel that will surely spark lively conversations about womanhood, parenthood, and about how—and for whom—to live.

Straight Talk

Straight Talk PDF Author: Sally Berkovic
Publisher: KTAV Publishing House, Inc.
ISBN: 9780881256611
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 276

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Book Description
Writing in the first person to her daughters, Berkovic relates stories from her upbringing to reconcile the contradictions between the opportunities of modern life and the constrictions of Orthodox practice. Originally published as Under my hat by Joseph's Bookstore, London in 1997. The subtitle on the cover and spine reads "my dilemma as a modern orthodox Jewish woman." No indexing is included. Annotation copyrighted by Book News, Inc., Portland, OR

Women in the Modern World

Women in the Modern World PDF Author: Mirra Komarovsky
Publisher: Rowman Altamira
ISBN: 9780759107281
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 356

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Book Description
In Women in the Modern World, noted feminist and sociologist Mirra Komarovsky begins with a consideration of biology. Reflecting on these now-familiar arguments that the natural biological differences between women and men dictate different social roles, Komarovsky demolishes these arguments by carefully reviewing studies that find sex differences in cognitive abilities, achievement, and psychological predispositions. In successive chapters, Komarovsky explores how differential socialization produces the differences that we think we observe between women and men, and how gender inequality disfigures the lives of women, men, and the relationships between them. One chapter examines how it plays out among college students at Barnard in the first college generation after the Second World War. Many of these bright and ambitious women feel trapped between their talents and the constraints of feminine domesticity mapped out for them by social expectations. Successive chapters examine the costs of choosing either alternative. Full-time homemakers feel, at best, overworked and undervalued, and at worst resentful and bitter. Many regret the "painful reorganization of life," and long, instead "for the relinquished occupation." It is this longing, she argues that leads so many women to "flit from one evanescent interest to another, arriving at late or middle age without anything that would given meaning or continuity to their lives."

Growing Strong Daughters

Growing Strong Daughters PDF Author: Lisa Graham McMinn
Publisher: Baker Books
ISBN: 1441202595
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 208

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Book Description
Today's culture offers broadening opportunities for women; yet it still pressures them to fit long-standing stereotypes. McMinn challenges parents, teachers, churches, and civic communities to create a social environment that nurtures strong, confident girls. Combining careful research with personal experience, McMinn takes a thoughtful look at gender differences and patterns limiting women's full participation in society. She discusses what it means to raise strong daughters made in the image of God and covers the various aspects of strength--confidence, interdependence, voice, and self-image.

Good-Enough Mother

Good-Enough Mother PDF Author: René Syler
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 141695127X
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 294

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Book Description
In an ideal world, mothers would have time to hand-sew their kids' costumes for the school play, prepare all-organic meals, and volunteer in the classroom at the drop of a hat. In reality, most moms have to settle for plopping their little ones in front of SpongeBob so that they can prepare yet another chicken nugget-based dinner, guiltily convinced they're falling down on the job. In Good-Enough Mother, René Syler pulls back the curtain to reveal the truth about modern mothering and reassure time-stressed moms that even if their children are strangers to made-from-scratch cookies, they can emerge as happy, well-adjusted, fully functioning members of society. Mother to two great kids of her own, Syler explains how she learned to chuck perfection for practicality -- in short, how she became a Good-Enough Mother. She shows other women seeking to balance family, work, and some semblance of a personal life how to happily join the ranks of Good-Enough Mothers, who occasionally serve breakfast for dinner yet give their children plenty of what really matters -- love, time, and support. Each essay provides welcome empathy and sage advice on navigating life's different obstacles, whether it's dealing with annoying Supermoms, bluffing through a third grader's math homework, or coping with the words that strike terror into every parent's heart ("Your son's teacher on line one"). Offering real wisdom tempered with humor and warmth, Good-Enough Mother will have every modern mom laughing in relief and recognition.

Dilemmas of Adulthood

Dilemmas of Adulthood PDF Author: Nancy R. Rosenberger
Publisher: University of Hawaii Press
ISBN: 0824839021
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 234

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Book Description
In Dilemmas of Adulthood, Nancy Rosenberger investigates the nature of long-term resistance in a longitudinal study of more than fifty Japanese women over two decades. Between 25 and 35 years of age when first interviewed in 1993, the women represent a generation straddling the stable roles of post-war modernity and the risky but exciting possibilities of late modernity. By exploring the challenges they pose to cultural codes, Rosenberger builds a conceptual framework of long-term resistance that undergirds the struggles and successes of modern Japanese women. Her findings resonate with broader anthropological questions about how change happens in our global-local era and suggests a useful model with which to analyze ordinary lives in the late modern world. Rosenberger’s analysis establishes long-term resistance as a vital type of social change in late modernity where the sway of media, global ideas, and friends vies strongly with the influence of family, school, and work. Women are at the nexus of these contradictions, dissatisfied with post-war normative roles in family, work, and leisure and yet—in Japan as elsewhere—committed to a search for self that shifts uneasily between self-actualization and selfishness. The women’s rich narratives and conversations recount their ambivalent defiance of social norms and attempts to live diverse lives as acceptable adults. In an epilogue, their experiences are framed by the aftermath of the 2011 earthquake and tsunami, which is already shaping the future of their long-term resistance. Drawing on such theorists as Ortner, Ueno, the Comaroffs, Melucci, and Bourdieu, Rosenberger posits that long-term resistance is a process of tense, irregular, but insistent change that is characteristic of our era, hammered out in the in-between of local and global, past and future, the old virtues of womanhood and the new virtues of self-actualization. Her book is essential for anyone wishing to understand how Japanese women have maneuvered their lives in the economic decline and pushed for individuation in the 1990s and 2000s.