How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Items

How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Items PDF Author: Jason Offutt
Publisher: Permuted Press
ISBN: 1618684345
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 169

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Book Description
The human race is an endangered species. Vampires, werewolves, Bigfoot, and killer robots – they’re all trying to kill us. Killer robots even have the word “killer” in their name. Can it get more obvious? We need to rid the world of these monsters before they rid the world of us. All of them. But these monsters aren’t real, right? Wrong, and you’re dead. These creatures wander the periphery of our reality, waiting for a moment of weakness, and then attack while we’re home alone in our underwear. “How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Items” is a guidebook on how to rid your life of these monsters before they kill you, so sharpen that machete and gas up the weed whacker, folks. Each chapter contains: · How to identify the monster · Who’s going to help you kill it · Your arsenal and where to keep it (kitchen, bathroom, living room, garage, etc.). · Behavior of the monster while you’re trying to kill it · Disposing of the body · Monster powers · Monster weaknesses · How to avoid the monster “How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Items” is a must have home defense guide for the do-it-yourself slayer. After using this book, you too can understand that setting gnomes on fire with a Bic lighter and a can of Aqua Net is funny.

How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Items

How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Items PDF Author: Jason Offutt
Publisher: Permuted Press
ISBN: 1618684345
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 169

Get Book Here

Book Description
The human race is an endangered species. Vampires, werewolves, Bigfoot, and killer robots – they’re all trying to kill us. Killer robots even have the word “killer” in their name. Can it get more obvious? We need to rid the world of these monsters before they rid the world of us. All of them. But these monsters aren’t real, right? Wrong, and you’re dead. These creatures wander the periphery of our reality, waiting for a moment of weakness, and then attack while we’re home alone in our underwear. “How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Items” is a guidebook on how to rid your life of these monsters before they kill you, so sharpen that machete and gas up the weed whacker, folks. Each chapter contains: · How to identify the monster · Who’s going to help you kill it · Your arsenal and where to keep it (kitchen, bathroom, living room, garage, etc.). · Behavior of the monster while you’re trying to kill it · Disposing of the body · Monster powers · Monster weaknesses · How to avoid the monster “How to Kill Monsters Using Common Household Items” is a must have home defense guide for the do-it-yourself slayer. After using this book, you too can understand that setting gnomes on fire with a Bic lighter and a can of Aqua Net is funny.

Monster Trouble!

Monster Trouble! PDF Author: Lane Fredrickson
Publisher: Union Square Kids
ISBN: 9781454913450
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Unafraid of the monsters who interfere with her bedtime, Winifred Schnitzel tries to find a way to scare them away.

The Superkids Activity Guide to Conquering Every Day

The Superkids Activity Guide to Conquering Every Day PDF Author: Dayna Abraham
Publisher:
ISBN: 1624144152
Category : Games & Activities
Languages : en
Pages : 211

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Book Description
Abraham, a certified child educator, shares 101 of the best sensory activities to help all kids succeed during times of the day when they have the most trouble focusing and being patient, whether it's getting out the door on time in the morning or peacefully eating a meal with their family at a restaurant. Full color.

There's a Monster in Your Book

There's a Monster in Your Book PDF Author: Tom Fletcher
Publisher: Penguin UK
ISBN: 0141385618
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 40

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Book Description
From the bestselling author of The Dinosaur That Pooped and The Christmasaurus. A monster has invaded the pages of this original and super-fun bedtime picture book! Children need to read aloud and follow the interactive instructions to help free the pesky monster by tilting, spinning and shaking their book. After all that fun, there is a calming wind down end- perfect to send your own little monster off to sleep. Perfect for little fans of The Very Hungry Caterpillar and Julia Donaldson.

Monster Manners

Monster Manners PDF Author: Bethany Roberts
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt
ISBN: 0547531842
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 35

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Book Description
In lilting rhymed text and colorful, lively pictures, three mischievous young monsters demonstrate good and bad manners in many situations, including playing, eating, reading, bathing, and cleaning house.

Jeremy Draws a Monster

Jeremy Draws a Monster PDF Author: Peter McCarty
Publisher: Henry Holt and Company (BYR)
ISBN: 142991730X
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 40

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Book Description
Alone in his room, Jeremy draws a monster. But then the monster wants lunch! As his creation takes over, Jeremy begins to wonder how he will ever get rid of the monstrous nuisance. He entertains his unwanted guest all day, but enough is enough. Jeremy finally draws him a bus ticket out of town! With a sure artistic touch and more than a dose of humor, Peter McCarty cleverly blurs the line between his own drawings and Jeremy's, and in doing so subtly questions the line between reality and imagination.

The Land

The Land PDF Author: Aleron Kong
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781952102004
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :

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Book Description
The 8th Novel of the Internationally Acclaimed Chaos Seeds Saga Over 100 THOUSAND ????? Reviews A mesmerizing tale reminiscent of the brutality of Goblin Slayer and the majesty of Game of Thrones Audible's Customer Favorite of the Year! #1 Audiobook 2017 #1 in Epic Fantasy || #1 in HumorWelcome my friends! Welcome... to "The Land!" The battle of the dead was won, but at a great cost. Sion,leader of the Mist Village was left with only pain and regret as Richter was claimed by the abyss. What no one but the abandoned chaos seed knows is that he narrowly avoided the curse of the lich Singh, a curse that still hangs above his head. Now, surrounded by miles of darkness and tons of crushing rock,Richter has to find his way back into the light. The only problem is that this monster of a man is being pursued by monsters, a demon and his own foolish choices. Faced with all the dangers of the deep dark, what will Richter say when the buried horrors of The Land come a calling and asked if he's paid his dues? Well he'll look right back, stare that horror in the eye and say, "Yes sir, the check is in the mail!" Welcome back my friends! Welcome back... to The Land! ps - Gnomes still Rule!

Monster in My Closet

Monster in My Closet PDF Author: R. L. Naquin
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 171

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Book Description
I stopped believing in monsters long ago. But I knew I wasn't imagining things when I found one in my kitchen baking muffins. I'd seen him before: lurking in my closet, scaring the crap out of my five-year-old self. Turns out that was a misunderstanding, and now Maurice needs a place to stay. How could I say no? After all, I've always been a magnet for the emotionally needy, and not just in my work as a wedding planner. Being able to sense the feelings of others can be a major pain. Don't get me wrong, I like helping people-and non-people. But this ability has turned me into a gourmet feast.

The Monster Gets a Hug and a Kiss

The Monster Gets a Hug and a Kiss PDF Author: Jack Graybill
Publisher: Tate Publishing
ISBN: 1615661573
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 28

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Book Description
Merry's heart was pounding! She took a deep breath. Then she ran to the closet with her arms open, shouting, 'I'm coming to get you, monster! I'm coming to give you a hug and a kiss! I hope you like hugs and kisses!' In The Monster Gets a Hug and a Kiss, Jack Graybill tells how Merry and her daddy put their heads together to get rid of the monster in her closet. Based on a true story, The Monster Gets a Hug and a Kiss portrays one child overcoming her fear in a delightful story for young readers. This is an eLIVE book, meaning each printed copy contains a special code redeemable for the free download of the audio version of the book.

Last Night I Sang to the Monster

Last Night I Sang to the Monster PDF Author: Benjamin Alire S‡enz
Publisher: Cinco Puntos Press
ISBN: 1933693584
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 243

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Book Description
Eighteen-year-old Zach does not remember how he came to be in a treatment center for alcoholics, but through therapy and caring friends, his amnesia fades and he learns to face his past while working toward a better future.