Bottling Farts, Inc. - Episode 2: Defiled

Bottling Farts, Inc. - Episode 2: Defiled PDF Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1624545440
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 34

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Book Description
THE F**KING IDIOT . . . Vlad Wieckowski has seen better days. With only the clothes on his back, he's out of money, out of luck, and out of gas. CONFRONTS THE EVIL PINT-SIZED BASTARD . . . That little sh*t Henry Winkle is at it again, and this time he's got warehouses full of toxic gas at his disposal. Can anyone stop his evil plot to gas the world? AND GETS F**KED OVER BY A MYSTERIOUS DIPSH*T AGENT . . . By his letter he is known. W. W for Wacky. W for Wicked. W for WTF?! WILL THE INDELIBLE SH*THEAD GET HIS REVENGE? Or is mankind totally f**ked? Defiled is the second episode of an ongoing serial, created specifically for the Eight Hour Fiction Challenge. Each installment is approximately 3,000-4,000 words.

Bottling Farts, Inc. - Episode 2: Defiled

Bottling Farts, Inc. - Episode 2: Defiled PDF Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1624545440
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 34

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Book Description
THE F**KING IDIOT . . . Vlad Wieckowski has seen better days. With only the clothes on his back, he's out of money, out of luck, and out of gas. CONFRONTS THE EVIL PINT-SIZED BASTARD . . . That little sh*t Henry Winkle is at it again, and this time he's got warehouses full of toxic gas at his disposal. Can anyone stop his evil plot to gas the world? AND GETS F**KED OVER BY A MYSTERIOUS DIPSH*T AGENT . . . By his letter he is known. W. W for Wacky. W for Wicked. W for WTF?! WILL THE INDELIBLE SH*THEAD GET HIS REVENGE? Or is mankind totally f**ked? Defiled is the second episode of an ongoing serial, created specifically for the Eight Hour Fiction Challenge. Each installment is approximately 3,000-4,000 words.

Bottling Farts, Inc. Season One

Bottling Farts, Inc. Season One PDF Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1386558710
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 142

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Book Description
THE F**KING IDIOT . . . Vlad Wieckowski has seen better days. With only the clothes on his back, he's out of money, out of luck, and out of gas. CONFRONTS THE EVIL PINT-SIZED BASTARD . . . That little sh*t Henry Winkle is at it again, and this time he's got warehouses full of toxic gas at his disposal. Can anyone stop his evil plot to gas the world? AND GETS F**KED OVER BY A MYSTERIOUS DIPSH*T AGENT . . . By his letter he is known. W. W for Wacky. W for Wicked. W for WTF?! WILL THE INDELIBLE SH*THEAD GET HIS REVENGE? Or is mankind totally f**ked? Season One includes all nine episodes of Bottling Farts, Inc. plus the original short story that kicked off the series. Approximately 35,000 words in all.

The Chapped-Ass Critic (EPUB)

The Chapped-Ass Critic (EPUB) PDF Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 1624544835
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 26

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Book Description
Zack Pimpton's ass never felt worse, and it doesn't help that his doctor is a part time comedian. Unfortunately, Zack is quite the bastard himself and accidentally says the wrong thing that causes the good, old doctor to snap. Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,300 words. EXCERPT FROM THE CHAPPED-ASS CRITIC “Doc, you’ve got to help me,” a thin, wiry man named Zack Pimpton bent over the padded table and rubbed his behind. “My ass hurts really, really bad. I think I might have broken it.” A bead of sweat trickled down his forehead. “How did this happen?” Dr. Marsh asked. “I don't know. I was typing up a review when suddenly my butt began to hurt. At first it stung just a little. I tried ignoring it, but it got worse and worse until I eventually found myself here. It's terrible! I can’t believe I was able to drive over here.” He tried sitting and recoiled immediately. “Well, you're in luck! It's nothing life-threatening, that’s for sure, but I'm afraid you won’t have use of your buttocks again,” the portly doctor cracked a smile.

Opium Fiend

Opium Fiend PDF Author: Steven Martin
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 0345517857
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 417

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Book Description
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER A renowned authority on the secret world of opium recounts his descent into ruinous obsession with one of the world’s oldest and most seductive drugs, in this harrowing memoir of addiction and recovery. A natural-born collector with a nose for exotic adventure, San Diego–born Steven Martin followed his bliss to Southeast Asia, where he found work as a freelance journalist. While researching an article about the vanishing culture of opium smoking, he was inspired to begin collecting rare nineteenth-century opium-smoking equipment. Over time, he amassed a valuable assortment of exquisite pipes, antique lamps, and other opium-related accessories—and began putting it all to use by smoking an extremely potent form of the drug called chandu. But what started out as recreational use grew into a thirty-pipe-a-day habit that consumed Martin’s every waking hour, left him incapable of work, and exacted a frightful physical and financial toll. In passages that will send a chill up the spine of anyone who has ever lived in the shadow of substance abuse, Martin chronicles his efforts to control and then conquer his addiction—from quitting cold turkey to taking “the cure” at a Buddhist monastery in the Thai countryside. At once a powerful personal story and a fascinating historical survey, Opium Fiend brims with anecdotes and lore surrounding the drug that some have called the methamphetamine of the nineteenth-century. It recalls the heyday of opium smoking in the United States and Europe and takes us inside the befogged opium dens of China, Thailand, Vietnam, and Laos. The drug’s beguiling effects are described in vivid detail—as are the excruciating pains of withdrawal—and there are intoxicating tales of pipes shared with an eclectic collection of opium aficionados, from Dutch dilettantes to hard-core addicts to world-weary foreign correspondents. A compelling tale of one man’s transformation from respected scholar to hapless drug slave, Opium Fiend puts us under opium’s spell alongside its protagonist, allowing contemporary readers to experience anew the insidious allure of a diabolical vice that the world has all but forgotten.

The Hairiest Butt

The Hairiest Butt PDF Author: Donald Rump
Publisher: Donald Rump
ISBN: 138643891X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 26

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Book Description
The search for the hairiest butt on Venus leads to explosive results. Approximately 1,600 words. WARNING: Butts, with lots of hair on them.

The new world of words. [&c.].

The new world of words. [&c.]. PDF Author: Edward Phillips
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category : English language
Languages : en
Pages : 726

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Book Description


Let's Pretend This Never Happened

Let's Pretend This Never Happened PDF Author: Jenny Lawson
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 1101573082
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 384

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Book Description
The #1 New York Times bestselling (mostly true) memoir from the hilarious author of Furiously Happy. “Gaspingly funny and wonderfully inappropriate.”—O, The Oprah Magazine When Jenny Lawson was little, all she ever wanted was to fit in. That dream was cut short by her fantastically unbalanced father and a morbidly eccentric childhood. It did, however, open up an opportunity for Lawson to find the humor in the strange shame-spiral that is her life, and we are all the better for it. In the irreverent Let’s Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson’s long-suffering husband and sweet daughter help her uncover the surprising discovery that the most terribly human moments—the ones we want to pretend never happened—are the very same moments that make us the people we are today. For every intellectual misfit who thought they were the only ones to think the things that Lawson dares to say out loud, this is a poignant and hysterical look at the dark, disturbing, yet wonderful moments of our lives. Readers Guide Inside

COMP HIST OF CONNECTICUT CIVIL

COMP HIST OF CONNECTICUT CIVIL PDF Author: Benjamin 1735-1820 Trumbull
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781360559018
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 550

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Book Description


An Anglo-Norman Reader

An Anglo-Norman Reader PDF Author: Jane Bliss
Publisher: Open Book Publishers
ISBN: 1783743166
Category : Literary Collections
Languages : en
Pages : 1044

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Book Description
This book is an anthology with a difference. It presents a distinctive variety of Anglo-Norman works, beginning in the twelfth century and ending in the nineteenth, covering a broad range of genres and writers, introduced in a lively and thought-provoking way. Facing-page translations, into accessible and engaging modern English, are provided throughout, bringing these texts to life for a contemporary audience. The collection offers a selection of fascinating passages, and whole texts, many of which are not anthologised or translated anywhere else. It explores little-known byways of Arthurian legend and stories of real-life crime and punishment; women’s voices tell history, write letters, berate pagans; advice is offered on how to win friends and influence people, how to cure people’s ailments and how to keep clear of the law; and stories from the Bible are retold with commentary, together with guidance on prayer and confession. Each text is introduced and elucidated with notes and full references, and the material is divided into three main sections: Story (a variety of narrative forms), Miscellany (including letters, law and medicine, and other non-fiction), and Religious (saints' lives, sermons, Bible commentary, and prayers). Passages in one genre have been chosen so as to reflect themes or stories that appear in another, so that the book can be enjoyed as a collection or used as a resource to dip into for selected texts. This anthology is essential reading for students and scholars of Anglo-Norman and medieval literature and culture. Wide-ranging and fully referenced, it can be used as a springboard for further study or relished in its own right by readers interested to discover Anglo-Norman literature that was written to amuse, instruct, entertain, or admonish medieval audiences.

Orature and Yoruba Riddles

Orature and Yoruba Riddles PDF Author: A. Akinyeme
Publisher: Springer
ISBN: 1137502630
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 274

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Book Description
Orature and Yorùbá Riddles takes readers into the hitherto unexplored undercurrents of riddles in Africa. Because of its oral and all too often ephemeral nature, riddles have escaped close scrutiny from scholars. The strength of the Yorùbá as the focus of this study is impressive indeed: a major ethnic group in Africa, with established connections with the black diaspora in North America and the Caribean; a rich oral and written culture; a large and diverse population; and an integrated rural-urban society. The book is divided into six chapters for readers' convenience. When read in sequence, the book provides a comprehensive, holistic sense of Yorùbá creativity where riddles are concerned. At the same time, the book is conceived in a way that each chapter could be read individually. Therefore, those readers seeking understanding of a specific type of riddle may target a single chapter appearing most relevant to her/his curiosity.