Author: Fred A. Reekie
Publisher: FriesenPress
ISBN: 1039171036
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 384
Book Description
A call from an unidentified woman shatters Meg Graham’s life. Already traumatized by a previous betrayal, this caller’s assertion settles it—Meg is filing for divorce. Husband, Art, stands to lose everything—Meg, their sons, friends, his job. Unfathomably, Art is confused. He loves his wife deeply, yet he is unable to stop his infidelity. How can he ever make this situation right? Guided by those who had travelled this path before them, both Meg and Art find competent counsellors and 12-step groups. Slowly, they begin to work through issues, past and present, and discover new realities for their lives. Is divorce the only solution, or can they create a new future together that is positive and fulfilling? Join Art as he acknowledges his sexual addiction, faces the consequences, explores its foundations, and embraces recovery. Walk alongside Meg as she questions her perceptions and probes her complex and conflicted emotions. Journey with the Grahams through the complicated realities of intimate partner betrayal and the processes that bring understanding, forgiveness, and recovery to a seemingly hopeless situation. Navigating the complicated and confusing aftermath of repeated infidelities is overwhelming for both the remorseful spouse and the betrayed partner. Beyond PISD: “Book Therapy” for Couples in Recovery is a highly readable novel, written explicitly as a bibliotherapy resource for individuals and couples who are recovering from sexual addiction and intimate partner betrayal. As couples reflect on Art and Meg Graham’s story, ideally with the support of a certified therapist, their own experiences are validated, they gain insight into the complex trauma created by infidelity, and they discover that healing is possible. Beyond PISD offers readers self awareness, compassion, and, perhaps above all else, hope.
Beyond PISD (Post-Infidelity Stress Disorder)
Author: Fred A. Reekie
Publisher: FriesenPress
ISBN: 1039171036
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 384
Book Description
A call from an unidentified woman shatters Meg Graham’s life. Already traumatized by a previous betrayal, this caller’s assertion settles it—Meg is filing for divorce. Husband, Art, stands to lose everything—Meg, their sons, friends, his job. Unfathomably, Art is confused. He loves his wife deeply, yet he is unable to stop his infidelity. How can he ever make this situation right? Guided by those who had travelled this path before them, both Meg and Art find competent counsellors and 12-step groups. Slowly, they begin to work through issues, past and present, and discover new realities for their lives. Is divorce the only solution, or can they create a new future together that is positive and fulfilling? Join Art as he acknowledges his sexual addiction, faces the consequences, explores its foundations, and embraces recovery. Walk alongside Meg as she questions her perceptions and probes her complex and conflicted emotions. Journey with the Grahams through the complicated realities of intimate partner betrayal and the processes that bring understanding, forgiveness, and recovery to a seemingly hopeless situation. Navigating the complicated and confusing aftermath of repeated infidelities is overwhelming for both the remorseful spouse and the betrayed partner. Beyond PISD: “Book Therapy” for Couples in Recovery is a highly readable novel, written explicitly as a bibliotherapy resource for individuals and couples who are recovering from sexual addiction and intimate partner betrayal. As couples reflect on Art and Meg Graham’s story, ideally with the support of a certified therapist, their own experiences are validated, they gain insight into the complex trauma created by infidelity, and they discover that healing is possible. Beyond PISD offers readers self awareness, compassion, and, perhaps above all else, hope.
Publisher: FriesenPress
ISBN: 1039171036
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 384
Book Description
A call from an unidentified woman shatters Meg Graham’s life. Already traumatized by a previous betrayal, this caller’s assertion settles it—Meg is filing for divorce. Husband, Art, stands to lose everything—Meg, their sons, friends, his job. Unfathomably, Art is confused. He loves his wife deeply, yet he is unable to stop his infidelity. How can he ever make this situation right? Guided by those who had travelled this path before them, both Meg and Art find competent counsellors and 12-step groups. Slowly, they begin to work through issues, past and present, and discover new realities for their lives. Is divorce the only solution, or can they create a new future together that is positive and fulfilling? Join Art as he acknowledges his sexual addiction, faces the consequences, explores its foundations, and embraces recovery. Walk alongside Meg as she questions her perceptions and probes her complex and conflicted emotions. Journey with the Grahams through the complicated realities of intimate partner betrayal and the processes that bring understanding, forgiveness, and recovery to a seemingly hopeless situation. Navigating the complicated and confusing aftermath of repeated infidelities is overwhelming for both the remorseful spouse and the betrayed partner. Beyond PISD: “Book Therapy” for Couples in Recovery is a highly readable novel, written explicitly as a bibliotherapy resource for individuals and couples who are recovering from sexual addiction and intimate partner betrayal. As couples reflect on Art and Meg Graham’s story, ideally with the support of a certified therapist, their own experiences are validated, they gain insight into the complex trauma created by infidelity, and they discover that healing is possible. Beyond PISD offers readers self awareness, compassion, and, perhaps above all else, hope.
Trust Again
Author: Debi Silber
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1538140640
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 245
Book Description
Recovering from betrayal can be hard, but it can be done with grace, love, and dignity, using the tips and tools in this warm and engaging book on learning to trust again. You couldn’t brace yourself because you never saw it coming. Your sense of safety and security is shattered in an instant, and the shock is imprinted on your body and mind. Your heart breaks, you feel like you got sucker punched, and the pain is so raw, consuming, and overwhelming you can barely breathe. Someone close to you, possibly a family member, partner, or friend, just pulled the rug out from underneath you—lies you so easily believed and actions you dismissed because it never crossed your mind that the one you trusted the most could ever hurt you. You thought this person had your back. You thought the two of you were honoring the same rules, sharing the same moral code, and respecting the same beliefs. This was a person you loved, trusted, and believed. This is what it feels like to be blindsided by betrayal. During times of betrayal, when we most need support, sometimes the ones we would turn to first are the betrayers. Other times, we’re saddled with shame and fear. But it’s during these times when we need to turn for help and learn to trust again. This work offers support, comfort, and community to those struggling with feelings associated with betrayal and guides them to healing from a painful experience with betrayal. Readers will learn about, and move through the proven five stages from betrayal to breakthrough, and will be lovingly guided with tools and strategies along the way. They’ll also learn how predictable healing can be as they read not only Debi’s journey through betrayal, but the stories of others who have learned to copy, heal, and move on from betrayal to a place of trust and well-being. Readers will identify with at least a few of the many people in the book who share their unique experiences. In addition, they’ll learn about the three groups who didn’t heal and be inspired to take a different course of action so that they can have a more positive outcome.
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1538140640
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 245
Book Description
Recovering from betrayal can be hard, but it can be done with grace, love, and dignity, using the tips and tools in this warm and engaging book on learning to trust again. You couldn’t brace yourself because you never saw it coming. Your sense of safety and security is shattered in an instant, and the shock is imprinted on your body and mind. Your heart breaks, you feel like you got sucker punched, and the pain is so raw, consuming, and overwhelming you can barely breathe. Someone close to you, possibly a family member, partner, or friend, just pulled the rug out from underneath you—lies you so easily believed and actions you dismissed because it never crossed your mind that the one you trusted the most could ever hurt you. You thought this person had your back. You thought the two of you were honoring the same rules, sharing the same moral code, and respecting the same beliefs. This was a person you loved, trusted, and believed. This is what it feels like to be blindsided by betrayal. During times of betrayal, when we most need support, sometimes the ones we would turn to first are the betrayers. Other times, we’re saddled with shame and fear. But it’s during these times when we need to turn for help and learn to trust again. This work offers support, comfort, and community to those struggling with feelings associated with betrayal and guides them to healing from a painful experience with betrayal. Readers will learn about, and move through the proven five stages from betrayal to breakthrough, and will be lovingly guided with tools and strategies along the way. They’ll also learn how predictable healing can be as they read not only Debi’s journey through betrayal, but the stories of others who have learned to copy, heal, and move on from betrayal to a place of trust and well-being. Readers will identify with at least a few of the many people in the book who share their unique experiences. In addition, they’ll learn about the three groups who didn’t heal and be inspired to take a different course of action so that they can have a more positive outcome.
Transcending Post-Infidelity Stress Disorder
Author: Dennis C. Ortman
Publisher: Celestial Arts
ISBN: 0307807800
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 258
Book Description
Have you been traumatized by infidelity? The phrase "broken heart" belies the real trauma behind the all-too-common occurrence of infidelity. Psychologist Dennis Ortman likens the psychological aftermath of sexual betrayal to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in its origin and symptoms, including anxiety, irritability, rage, emotional numbing, and flashbacks. Using PTSD treatment as a model, Dr. Ortman will show you, step by step, how to: • work through conflicting emotions • Understand yourself and your partner • Make important life decisions Dr. Ortman sees recovery as a spiritual journey and draws on the wisdom of diverse faiths, from Christianity to Buddhism. He also offers exercises to deepen recovery, such as guided meditations and journaling, and explores heart-wrenchingly familiar case studies of couples struggling with monogamy. By the end of this book, you will have completed the six stages of healing and emerged with a whole heart, a full spirit, and the freedom to love again.
Publisher: Celestial Arts
ISBN: 0307807800
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 258
Book Description
Have you been traumatized by infidelity? The phrase "broken heart" belies the real trauma behind the all-too-common occurrence of infidelity. Psychologist Dennis Ortman likens the psychological aftermath of sexual betrayal to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in its origin and symptoms, including anxiety, irritability, rage, emotional numbing, and flashbacks. Using PTSD treatment as a model, Dr. Ortman will show you, step by step, how to: • work through conflicting emotions • Understand yourself and your partner • Make important life decisions Dr. Ortman sees recovery as a spiritual journey and draws on the wisdom of diverse faiths, from Christianity to Buddhism. He also offers exercises to deepen recovery, such as guided meditations and journaling, and explores heart-wrenchingly familiar case studies of couples struggling with monogamy. By the end of this book, you will have completed the six stages of healing and emerged with a whole heart, a full spirit, and the freedom to love again.
Sadistic Love
Author: Deborah M. Mueller
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1449010202
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 235
Book Description
This riveting narrative is about sadomasochism within the bonds of matrimony. The purpose of this book is to spark the awakening of other "insecure princesses" who find themselves trapped in sexually abusive relationships. This book is also about educating health care professionals about the brainwashing and powerlessness involved in sadomasochistic relationships through a personal account into the secretive world of S & M. From an academic view, topics such as feminist psychology, empowerment, boundary setting, and the importance of the therapeutic alliance play out in the journey to break free from this dark, destructive lifestyle. I write as the voice of a survivor. I made it out of a twenty-two year marriage where I was nothing more than a sex slave to my husband, and I have emerged into a new life filled with light and love.
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1449010202
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 235
Book Description
This riveting narrative is about sadomasochism within the bonds of matrimony. The purpose of this book is to spark the awakening of other "insecure princesses" who find themselves trapped in sexually abusive relationships. This book is also about educating health care professionals about the brainwashing and powerlessness involved in sadomasochistic relationships through a personal account into the secretive world of S & M. From an academic view, topics such as feminist psychology, empowerment, boundary setting, and the importance of the therapeutic alliance play out in the journey to break free from this dark, destructive lifestyle. I write as the voice of a survivor. I made it out of a twenty-two year marriage where I was nothing more than a sex slave to my husband, and I have emerged into a new life filled with light and love.
The Addiction Recovery Workbook
Author: Paula A. Freedman
Publisher: Althea Press
ISBN: 9781641521178
Category : Education
Languages : en
Pages : 188
Book Description
Prevent relapse with practical coping skills for everyday life from The Addiction Recovery Workbook. Preventing relapse in daily life is where the work of a successful recovery starts. The Addiction Recovery Workbook equips you with actionable strategies and coping skills to prevent relapse and succeed in recovery when faced with day-to-day challenges, stressors, and triggers. From navigating intimate relationships to handling high-risk situations and environments, this addiction workbook offers practical tools and hands-on exercises that you can use in your home, work, and personal life. Once equipped with these skills, you'll establish new routines and rituals that do not involve substance abuse, and redefine your personal identity by connecting to what matters most to you. Designed for you to use on your own, or alongside a 12-step program, The Addiction Recovery Workbook gives you the skills you need for successful recovery with: An essential introduction that helps you understand your addiction and outlines the path to recovery. Coping skills to handle thoughts, emotions, relationships, and high-risk situations and environments. Prevention tactics that help you succeed in lifelong recovery by setting new, addiction-free lifestyle habits and routines. On your recovery journey ahead, there may be obstacles. Armed with the skills and strategies in The Addiction Recovery Workbook, you will overcome every single one you face.
Publisher: Althea Press
ISBN: 9781641521178
Category : Education
Languages : en
Pages : 188
Book Description
Prevent relapse with practical coping skills for everyday life from The Addiction Recovery Workbook. Preventing relapse in daily life is where the work of a successful recovery starts. The Addiction Recovery Workbook equips you with actionable strategies and coping skills to prevent relapse and succeed in recovery when faced with day-to-day challenges, stressors, and triggers. From navigating intimate relationships to handling high-risk situations and environments, this addiction workbook offers practical tools and hands-on exercises that you can use in your home, work, and personal life. Once equipped with these skills, you'll establish new routines and rituals that do not involve substance abuse, and redefine your personal identity by connecting to what matters most to you. Designed for you to use on your own, or alongside a 12-step program, The Addiction Recovery Workbook gives you the skills you need for successful recovery with: An essential introduction that helps you understand your addiction and outlines the path to recovery. Coping skills to handle thoughts, emotions, relationships, and high-risk situations and environments. Prevention tactics that help you succeed in lifelong recovery by setting new, addiction-free lifestyle habits and routines. On your recovery journey ahead, there may be obstacles. Armed with the skills and strategies in The Addiction Recovery Workbook, you will overcome every single one you face.
It Takes One to Tango
Author: Winifred M. Reilly
Publisher: Gallery Books
ISBN: 9781501125867
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 0
Book Description
With a focus on self-empowerment and resilience, this refreshing and witty relationship guide has a reassuring counterintuitive message for unhappy spouses: you only need one partner to initiate far-reaching positive change in a marriage. Conventional wisdom says that “it takes two” to turn a troubled marriage around and that both partners must have a shared commitment to change. So when couples can’t agree on how—or whether—to make their marriage better, many give up or settle for a less-than-satisfying marriage (or think the only way out is divorce). Fortunately, there is an alternative. “What distinguishes Reilly’s book is that she says a warring couple don’t have to agree on the goal of staying together; it takes one person changing, not both, to make a marriage work” (The New York Times). Marriage and family therapist Winifred Reilly has this message for struggling partners: Take the lead. Doing so is effective—and powerful. Through Reilly’s own story of reclaiming her now nearly forty-year marriage, along with anecdotes from many clients she’s worked with, you’ll learn how to: -Focus on your own behaviors and change them in ways that make you feel good about yourself and your marriage -Take a firm stand for what truly matters to you without arguing, cajoling, or resorting to threats -Identify the “big picture” issues at the basis of your repetitive fights—and learn how to unhook from them -Be less reactive, especially in the face of your spouse’s provocations -Develop the strength and stamina to be the sole agent of change Combining psychological theory, practical advice, and personal narrative, It Takes One to Tango is a “wise and uplifting” (Dr. Ellyn Bader, Director of The Couples Institute) guide that will empower those who choose to take a bold, proactive approach to creating a loving and lasting marriage.
Publisher: Gallery Books
ISBN: 9781501125867
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 0
Book Description
With a focus on self-empowerment and resilience, this refreshing and witty relationship guide has a reassuring counterintuitive message for unhappy spouses: you only need one partner to initiate far-reaching positive change in a marriage. Conventional wisdom says that “it takes two” to turn a troubled marriage around and that both partners must have a shared commitment to change. So when couples can’t agree on how—or whether—to make their marriage better, many give up or settle for a less-than-satisfying marriage (or think the only way out is divorce). Fortunately, there is an alternative. “What distinguishes Reilly’s book is that she says a warring couple don’t have to agree on the goal of staying together; it takes one person changing, not both, to make a marriage work” (The New York Times). Marriage and family therapist Winifred Reilly has this message for struggling partners: Take the lead. Doing so is effective—and powerful. Through Reilly’s own story of reclaiming her now nearly forty-year marriage, along with anecdotes from many clients she’s worked with, you’ll learn how to: -Focus on your own behaviors and change them in ways that make you feel good about yourself and your marriage -Take a firm stand for what truly matters to you without arguing, cajoling, or resorting to threats -Identify the “big picture” issues at the basis of your repetitive fights—and learn how to unhook from them -Be less reactive, especially in the face of your spouse’s provocations -Develop the strength and stamina to be the sole agent of change Combining psychological theory, practical advice, and personal narrative, It Takes One to Tango is a “wise and uplifting” (Dr. Ellyn Bader, Director of The Couples Institute) guide that will empower those who choose to take a bold, proactive approach to creating a loving and lasting marriage.
Sex Addiction: The Partner's Perspective
Author: Paula Hall
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 1317660757
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 176
Book Description
Sex and pornography addiction are growing problems that devastate the lives of partners as well as sufferers. Sex Addiction: The Partner's Perspective has been written to help partners and those who care about them to survive the shock of discovering their partner is a sex addict and to help them make decisions about the future of their relationships and their lives. First and foremost, it is a practical book, full of facts, and self help exercises to give partners a much needed sense of stability and control. Like its sister book, Understanding and Treating Sex Addiction, it includes case examples and survey results revealing the reality of life for partners of sex addicts. Sex Addiction: The Partner's Perspective is divided into three parts. Part I explores the myths surrounding sex addiction and provides up to date information about what sex addiction is and what causes it before moving on to explain why the discovery hurts partners so much. Part II is about partners’ needs and includes self-help exercises and strategies to help partners regain stability, rebuild self-esteem and consider their future. The controversial topic of co-dependency is also explored with guidance on how to identify it, avoid it and overcome it. Part III focuses on the couple relationship starting with the difficult decision of whether to stay or leave. Whatever the decision, partners will then find help and support for rebuilding trust and reclaiming their sexuality. This book has been written to help partners not only survive, but to grow stronger and move on with their lives – whether alone, or in their relationship. Readers will find revealing statistics and real life stories shared by partners who kindly took part in the first UK survey of sex addiction partners. This book will this book be a valuable guide for partners, but also for the therapists who seek to support them on their journey of recovery.
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 1317660757
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 176
Book Description
Sex and pornography addiction are growing problems that devastate the lives of partners as well as sufferers. Sex Addiction: The Partner's Perspective has been written to help partners and those who care about them to survive the shock of discovering their partner is a sex addict and to help them make decisions about the future of their relationships and their lives. First and foremost, it is a practical book, full of facts, and self help exercises to give partners a much needed sense of stability and control. Like its sister book, Understanding and Treating Sex Addiction, it includes case examples and survey results revealing the reality of life for partners of sex addicts. Sex Addiction: The Partner's Perspective is divided into three parts. Part I explores the myths surrounding sex addiction and provides up to date information about what sex addiction is and what causes it before moving on to explain why the discovery hurts partners so much. Part II is about partners’ needs and includes self-help exercises and strategies to help partners regain stability, rebuild self-esteem and consider their future. The controversial topic of co-dependency is also explored with guidance on how to identify it, avoid it and overcome it. Part III focuses on the couple relationship starting with the difficult decision of whether to stay or leave. Whatever the decision, partners will then find help and support for rebuilding trust and reclaiming their sexuality. This book has been written to help partners not only survive, but to grow stronger and move on with their lives – whether alone, or in their relationship. Readers will find revealing statistics and real life stories shared by partners who kindly took part in the first UK survey of sex addiction partners. This book will this book be a valuable guide for partners, but also for the therapists who seek to support them on their journey of recovery.
Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life
Author: Tracy Schorn
Publisher: Running Press Adult
ISBN: 0762459050
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 242
Book Description
Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life is a no-nonsense self-help guide for anyone who has ever been cheated on. Here's advice not based on saving your relationship after infidelity -- but saving your sanity. When it comes to cheating, a lot of the attention is focused on cheaters -- their unmet needs or their challenges with monogamy. But Tracy Schorn (aka Chump Lady) lampoons such blameshifting and puts the focus squarely on the-cheated-upon (chumps) and their needs. Combining solid advice that champions self-respect, along with hilarious cartoons satirizing the pomposity of cheaters, Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life offers a fresh voice for chumps who want (and need) a new message about infidelity. This book will offer advice on Stupid sh*t cheaters say and how to respond, Rookie mistakes of the recently chumped and how to disarm your fears, Why chumps take the blame and how to protect yourself, and more. Full of snark, sass, and real wisdom about how to bounce back after the gut blow of betrayal, Schorn is the friend who guides you through this nightmare and gives you hope for a better life ahead.
Publisher: Running Press Adult
ISBN: 0762459050
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 242
Book Description
Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life is a no-nonsense self-help guide for anyone who has ever been cheated on. Here's advice not based on saving your relationship after infidelity -- but saving your sanity. When it comes to cheating, a lot of the attention is focused on cheaters -- their unmet needs or their challenges with monogamy. But Tracy Schorn (aka Chump Lady) lampoons such blameshifting and puts the focus squarely on the-cheated-upon (chumps) and their needs. Combining solid advice that champions self-respect, along with hilarious cartoons satirizing the pomposity of cheaters, Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life offers a fresh voice for chumps who want (and need) a new message about infidelity. This book will offer advice on Stupid sh*t cheaters say and how to respond, Rookie mistakes of the recently chumped and how to disarm your fears, Why chumps take the blame and how to protect yourself, and more. Full of snark, sass, and real wisdom about how to bounce back after the gut blow of betrayal, Schorn is the friend who guides you through this nightmare and gives you hope for a better life ahead.
Armorial of Jersey
Author: James Bertrand Payne
Publisher: Рипол Классик
ISBN: 5881622669
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 589
Book Description
being an account, heraldic and antiquarian, of its chief native families, with pedigrees, biographical notices, and illustrative data; to which are added, a brief history of heraldry, and remarks on the medi?val antiquities of the island
Publisher: Рипол Классик
ISBN: 5881622669
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 589
Book Description
being an account, heraldic and antiquarian, of its chief native families, with pedigrees, biographical notices, and illustrative data; to which are added, a brief history of heraldry, and remarks on the medi?val antiquities of the island
The Tao of Fully Feeling
Author: Pete Walker
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781515079767
Category : Adult children of dysfunctional families
Languages : en
Pages : 273
Book Description
This book is a handbook for increasing your emotional intelligence. Moreover, if you are a survivor of a dysfunctional family, it is a guide for repairing the damage done to your emotional nature in childhood. The Tao of Fully Feeling focuses primarily on the emotional healing level of trauma recovery. It is a safe handbook for grieving losses of childhood. Whether or not you are a childhood trauma survivor, this book is a guide to emotional health. The degree of our mental health is often reflected in the degree to which we love and respect ourselves and others in a myriad of different feeling states. Real self-esteem and real intimacy with others depends on the ability to lovingly be there for oneself and others, whether one's feeling experience is pleasant or unpleasant.
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781515079767
Category : Adult children of dysfunctional families
Languages : en
Pages : 273
Book Description
This book is a handbook for increasing your emotional intelligence. Moreover, if you are a survivor of a dysfunctional family, it is a guide for repairing the damage done to your emotional nature in childhood. The Tao of Fully Feeling focuses primarily on the emotional healing level of trauma recovery. It is a safe handbook for grieving losses of childhood. Whether or not you are a childhood trauma survivor, this book is a guide to emotional health. The degree of our mental health is often reflected in the degree to which we love and respect ourselves and others in a myriad of different feeling states. Real self-esteem and real intimacy with others depends on the ability to lovingly be there for oneself and others, whether one's feeling experience is pleasant or unpleasant.