The Funniest Things Ever Said, New and Expanded

The Funniest Things Ever Said, New and Expanded PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1493041207
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 343

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Book Description
Here are1,237 laugh-out-loud quotes, quips, and jokes, all in one packed-to-the-brim volume. Yes, folks, sit back and enjoy this collection of inadvertent gaffes, thigh-slappers, puns, and everything and anything else that'll tickle your funny bone. There’s something old, something new, something stolen, and something blue—from favorite comedians, sports and political figures, and literary wits. There are even giggles for the kids and groaners for the grown-ups. Just a few among the 1,237 funniest things ever said: “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.”—Rita Rudner “I don’t know if it’s good for baseball, but it sure beats the hell out of rooming with Phil Rizzuto.”—Yogi Berra on being told that Joe DiMaggio was to marry Marilyn Monroe “I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.”—Malcolm Forbes “The Dalai Lama visited the White House and told the President that he could teach him to find a higher state of consciousness. Then, after talking to Bush for a few minutes, he said, ‘You know what? Let’s just grab lunch.’”—Bill Maher

The Funniest Things Ever Said, New and Expanded

The Funniest Things Ever Said, New and Expanded PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1493041207
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 343

Get Book Here

Book Description
Here are1,237 laugh-out-loud quotes, quips, and jokes, all in one packed-to-the-brim volume. Yes, folks, sit back and enjoy this collection of inadvertent gaffes, thigh-slappers, puns, and everything and anything else that'll tickle your funny bone. There’s something old, something new, something stolen, and something blue—from favorite comedians, sports and political figures, and literary wits. There are even giggles for the kids and groaners for the grown-ups. Just a few among the 1,237 funniest things ever said: “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.”—Rita Rudner “I don’t know if it’s good for baseball, but it sure beats the hell out of rooming with Phil Rizzuto.”—Yogi Berra on being told that Joe DiMaggio was to marry Marilyn Monroe “I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.”—Malcolm Forbes “The Dalai Lama visited the White House and told the President that he could teach him to find a higher state of consciousness. Then, after talking to Bush for a few minutes, he said, ‘You know what? Let’s just grab lunch.’”—Bill Maher

The Dumbest Things Ever Said

The Dumbest Things Ever Said PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1493029436
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 353

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Book Description
A collection of stupid utterances, mostly unintentional--although not always--from politics, show business, sports, and anywhere else people can put their feet in their mouths. Based on recorded history, it's safe to say that dumb remarks have been with us since the invention of writing. Young or old, rich or poor, famous or unknown, people of all generations and cultures have seized the opportunity to say something dumb - stupidity has always been an equal opportunity employer. In celebration of such mental lapses and pure idiocy, here is a collection of stupid utterances, unintentional and otherwise, from the worlds of politics, radio, television, newspapers, show business, sports, and literature - and everywhere else people can - and have - put their feet in their mouths.

The Most Low-down, Lousiest, Loathsome Things Ever Said

The Most Low-down, Lousiest, Loathsome Things Ever Said PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1493029452
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 353

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Book Description
A nasty insult (is there any other kind?) can be offensive and infuriating, but we’ve all had those moments when we’ve employed one or just wished we had come up with the perfect nasty thing to say. Even better, having the perfect comeback to one of these rude remarks brings us all the personal satisfaction in the world. The Nastiest Things Ever Said gathers together the very sharpest of these barbs from a wide variety of sources with some of the wickedest put-downs from the literary, political, and entertainment worlds, and everywhere else people say nasty things to each other.

The Most Inspiring Things Ever Said

The Most Inspiring Things Ever Said PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1493026232
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 377

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Book Description
A compendium of indispensable and inspiring quotes for people during any season of their lives…. The Most Inspiring Things Ever Said is a compendium of human wisdom culled from the world’s most celebrated—and sometimes anonymous—minds. From business figures, coaches and other sports figures, religious and spiritual leaders, educators, political leaders, and anyone who has ever inspired people, it is quite simply the best collection of quotes to inspire readers to new heights of endeavor, or start someone off on the right foot, whether it’s along the road less traveled or the more traditional path.

The Smartest Things Ever Said, New and Expanded

The Smartest Things Ever Said, New and Expanded PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1493026291
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 393

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Book Description
The Smartest Things Ever Said is a compendium of human wisdom culled from the world’s most celebrated—and sometimes anonymous—minds. From Confucius and Shakespeare to Maya Angelou and Woody Allen, and from Winston Churchill and Thomas Edison to Jeff Bezos and Jane Fonda, it is quite simply the best collection of the smartest quotes ever.

More Than Sympathy

More Than Sympathy PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 162873888X
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 144

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Book Description
Making sensible decisions during a time of grief is never easy. Losing a husband, wife, father, mother, child or another near and dear person forces you to make a multitude of decisions, some large and life-changing, some small but emotionally charged. And if substantial amounts of money or conflicting wishes of friends and relatives are involved, making arrangements can become overwhelming. More Than Sympathy is designed to help you through these difficult circumstances. It covers: - Preliminary formalities, such as securing the residence and valuables immediately following the loved one’s death - Selecting the funeral home - Planning the funeral or memorial service, including suggestions for eulogies - Grief counseling and therapy - Probating the Will or administering an intestate estate - Survivor benefits, pensions, and other financial and tax consequences - Estate planning to avoid probate and other estate issues through gifts, trusts, and other instruments - And more Drawing from the counsel of funeral directors, clergy, attorneys, estate planners, and psychologists and with references to websites and other sources of further information, More Than Sympathy provides straightforward and reassuring advice that is both practical and comforting at this difficult time.

1001 Insults, Put-Downs, & Comebacks

1001 Insults, Put-Downs, & Comebacks PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1599216566
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 361

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Book Description
“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”—Groucho Marx An insult can be offensive and infuriating, but it means nothing if you have a better comeback. 1001 Insults, Put-Downs, and Comebacks gathers together the very sharpest of these barbs from a wide variety of sources, with some of the wickedest put-downs from the literary, political, and entertainment worlds, along with many others.

The Ultimate Guide to Fishing Skills, Tactics, and Techniques

The Ultimate Guide to Fishing Skills, Tactics, and Techniques PDF Author: Graham Moore
Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing Inc.
ISBN: 1616085614
Category : Nature
Languages : en
Pages : 799

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Book Description
Provides tips and information about many aspects of fishing, including knots, tackle, fishing boats, cooking, accessories, and includes fifteen personal fishing stories.

What to Do When a Loved One Dies

What to Do When a Loved One Dies PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing Inc.
ISBN: 1602397406
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 193

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Book Description
Everything to do after a relative or friend dies, from arranging the funeral to dealing with the financial and emotional...

I Love Horses

I Love Horses PDF Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 149308688X
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 257

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Book Description
I Love Horses gathers the most memorable quotes about horses ever written, recorded, or carried down through the ages, together with 50 fantastic photos of the prettiest horses available. Horses bring out the best in us; they inspire adoration and compassion. They have served as both muse and catharsis for artists and writers of all centuries and genres. Horses illuminate the prose of literary giants from Homer and Aesop to Steinbeck and Yeats and in sources that range from the Bible and Dante's Inferno to West with the Night, references to horses are abound. In I Love Horses, humorous remarks from the likes of Groucho Marx and Henny Youngman share the pages with valuable wisdom on training and horsemanship from widely honored trainers, past and present. What living creature is the most noble of all, and has spurred on great minds throughout history from Shakespeare to Winston Churchill? All hippophiles know the answer. It is the horse, of course. For all those in love with this magnificent animal, I Love Horses will reside close to the heart and never be far away. Includes wisdom from: Dave Barry Napoleon Bonaparte Lewis Carroll Geoffrey Chaucer Charles Dickens Emily Dickinson Walter Farley W. C. Fields Ian Fleming Benjamin Franklin Samuel Johnson Nikita Khrushchev Rudyard Kipling Groucho Marx Thomas McGuane Herman Melville Plato Damon Runyon J. D. Salinger William Shakespeare Jonathan Swift Alfred, Lord Tennyson Mark Twain Virgil