You're Saying It Wrong

You're Saying It Wrong PDF Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Ten Speed Press
ISBN: 0399578080
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 194

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Book Description
For word nerds and grammar geeks, a witty guide to the most commonly mispronounced words, along with their correct pronunciations and pithy forays into their fascinating etymologies and histories of use and misuse. With wit and good humor, this handy little book not only saves us from sticky linguistic situations but also provides fascinating cocktail-party-ready anecdotes. Entries reveal how to pronounce boatswain like an old salt on the deck of a ship, trompe l'oeil like a bona fide art expert, and haricot vert like a foodie, while arming us with the knowledge of why certain words are correctly pronounced the "slangy" way (they came about before dictionaries), what stalks of grain have to do with pronunciation, and more. With bonus sidebars like "How to Sound like a Seasoned Traveler" and "How to Sound Cultured," readers will be able to speak about foreign foods and places, fashion, philosophy, and literature with authority.

You're Saying It Wrong

You're Saying It Wrong PDF Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Ten Speed Press
ISBN: 0399578080
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 194

Get Book Here

Book Description
For word nerds and grammar geeks, a witty guide to the most commonly mispronounced words, along with their correct pronunciations and pithy forays into their fascinating etymologies and histories of use and misuse. With wit and good humor, this handy little book not only saves us from sticky linguistic situations but also provides fascinating cocktail-party-ready anecdotes. Entries reveal how to pronounce boatswain like an old salt on the deck of a ship, trompe l'oeil like a bona fide art expert, and haricot vert like a foodie, while arming us with the knowledge of why certain words are correctly pronounced the "slangy" way (they came about before dictionaries), what stalks of grain have to do with pronunciation, and more. With bonus sidebars like "How to Sound like a Seasoned Traveler" and "How to Sound Cultured," readers will be able to speak about foreign foods and places, fashion, philosophy, and literature with authority.

Awkword Moments

Awkword Moments PDF Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Ten Speed Press
ISBN: 1984856383
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 194

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Book Description
A compendium of 100 words and phrases smart people use--even if they only kinda sorta (secretly don't) know what they mean--with pithy definitions and fascinating etymologies to solidify their meanings. Your boss makes a joke about Schrodinger's cat--which is something you've heard of but you're a little vague about what exactly happened (or didn't happen) with that cat. Or you're reading a New Yorker article that explains that "Solecism slipped into solipsism into full-blown narcissistic project." An excellent point . . . if you're sure what "solecism" means . . . or, for that matter, "solipsism." Language gurus Ross Petras and Kathryn Petras to the rescue! In the breezy and entertaining yet informative style of their New York Times bestseller You're Saying It Wrong, they give you a brief rundown on words smart people should know--from the worlds of science and the arts to philosophy, and from broader topics like quantum physics and ontology to more specific ones like Plato's cave and trompe l'oeil. They cover the Latin phrases we hear and read (prima facie, sui generis, and the like) as well as those that have entered our vocabularies from other languages (bildungsroman, sturm und drang). These are the words that, if you were asked directly, "What does this mean?" you might hem and haw and try to change the subject. After reading this book, you won't have to.

Jane's Guide to Dicks (and Toms and Harrys)

Jane's Guide to Dicks (and Toms and Harrys) PDF Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449407226
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 130

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Book Description
Inside Jane's Guide to Dicks (and Toms and Harrys), best-selling humorists Ross and Kathyrn Petras offer tongue-in-cheek lessons to help your average Jane suss out all the Dicks (and Toms and Harrys) they encounter along the way to finding Mr. Right. Once upon a time, Jane didn't know Jack about Dick; however, after careful research, study, and observation, Jane is now an expert on boys, and she's ready to share all her special secrets to help good girls everywhere find their own Dicks (or Toms, or Harrys). Four-color art appears throughout, and each special secret offers suggestively irreverent and sassy quips such as: * Not all boys are created equal. Some of them have BIG machines. Some of them have SMALL machines. A big machine is usually BETTER! (But not TOO big!) * Just because he has balls doesn't mean he wants to shoot a basket in your--or any other girl's--hoop! * Boys who stare at your chest and forget you have a face are the REAL boobs!

1, 2, Can't Reach My Shoe

1, 2, Can't Reach My Shoe PDF Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449402143
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 34

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Book Description
The 1, 2, 3s of adulthood differ ever so slightly from the popular grade-school primers of yesteryear inside Ross and Kathryn Petras's 1, 2, Can't Reach My Shoe. This clever counting book for the middle-aged (which the United States Census Bureau defines as age 35 and above) is perfect for readers of a certain vintage who intend to grow old gracefully--and with a sense of humor. Featuring full-color, retro illustrations in a playful board book format, 1, 2, Can't Reach My Shoe makes an excellent, humorous gift for the more than 78.2 million baby boomers in the United States. Consider: * 3: When they were first going out in their twenties, Thaddeus and Theresa used to have sex THREE times each day. Now that they are middle-aged, they still have sex THREE times. A year. *: Hey, those don't look like numbers! And you're right. They are not numbers. They are symbols that are used with numbers . . . and they are all over middle-aged Milton's doctor's report. "It says I should have a total cholesterol 60. I should have LDL * 59 1/2: Today is a great day! It is Carl's FIFTY-NINTH-AND-A-HALF birthday! Carl usually wouldn't celebrate a half birthday, but this one is different. Since he has turned FIFTY-NINE-AND-A-HALF, he is getting a nice present from his Uncle Sam: his very first penalty-free IRA distribution!

Very Bad Poetry

Very Bad Poetry PDF Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Vintage
ISBN: 0679776222
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 145

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Book Description
Writing very bad poetry requires talent. It helps to have a wooden ear for words, a penchant for sinking into a mire of sentimentality, and an enviable confidence that allows one to write despite absolutely appalling incompetence. The 131 poems collected in this first-of-its-kind anthology are so glaringly awful that they embody a kind of genius. From Fred Emerson Brooks' "The Stuttering Lover" to Matthew Green's "The Spleen" to Georgia Bailey Parrington's misguided "An Elegy to a Dissected Puppy", they mangle meter, run rampant over rhyme, and bludgeon us into insensibility with their grandiosity, anticlimax, and malapropism. Guaranteed to move even the most stoic reader to tears (of laughter), Very Bad Poetry is sure to become a favorite of the poetically inclined (and disinclined).

Stupid Movie Lines

Stupid Movie Lines PDF Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 0307800954
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 231

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Book Description
The creme de la crud of screen history "War! War! That's all you think of, Dick Plantagenet! You burner! You pillager!" --Virginia Mayo as Lady Edith to George Sanders in King Richard and the Crusaders (1954) "Visits? That would indicate visitors." --Army captain learning of alien visits in Plan 9 from Outer Space (1959) "When I'm sitting here with you, I don't even think about the slime people." --Hero to heroine in The Slime People (1962) "Suck the coffin mushroom now." --The Ultimate Vampire (1991) "This is bad." --Leonardo DiCaprio as the you-know-what hits the you-know-what in Titanic (1997)

You're Saying It Wrong

You're Saying It Wrong PDF Author: Ross Petras
Publisher: Ten Speed Press
ISBN: 0399578099
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 194

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Book Description
For word nerds and grammar geeks, a witty guide to the most commonly mispronounced words, along with their correct pronunciations and pithy forays into their fascinating etymologies and histories of use and misuse. With wit and good humor, this handy little book not only saves us from sticky linguistic situations but also provides fascinating cocktail-party-ready anecdotes. Entries reveal how to pronounce boatswain like an old salt on the deck of a ship, trompe l'oeil like a bona fide art expert, and haricot vert like a foodie, while arming us with the knowledge of why certain words are correctly pronounced the "slangy" way (they came about before dictionaries), what stalks of grain have to do with pronunciation, and more. With bonus sidebars like "How to Sound like a Seasoned Traveler" and "How to Sound Cultured," readers will be able to speak about foreign foods and places, fashion, philosophy, and literature with authority.

"Dance First. Think Later"

Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Workman Publishing Company
ISBN: 1523516844
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 365

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Book Description
Timeless in their wisdom, thought-provoking in their message, surprising in their truth and memorable in their originality, the right words can give direction, inspiration, and sometimes a tangible boost onto the right path. For example, Steve Jobs once read “Stay hungry Stay foolish” on the back cover of The Whole Earth Catalog, and those four words came to guide his life. Created by Kathryn and Ross Petras, connoisseurs of quotes, whose books and calendars have over 56 million copies in print, "Dance First. Think Later." is a collection of the greatest life wisdom from an unexpected group of speakers, doers, and thinkers. There are 618 rules to live by—funny, sly, declarative, thoughtful, offhanded, clever, and always profound: “Watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you, because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places.” —Roald Dahl “If everything is under control, you are going too slow.” —Mario Andretti “Never make a credit decision on a beach.”—Victor J. Boschini “Dance first. Think later. It’s the natural order.”—Samuel Beckett “The only time to eat diet food is while waiting for the steak to cook.” —Julia Child “What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight; build it anyway.” —Mother Teresa And: “Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.”—Oscar Wilde

Wretched Writing

Wretched Writing PDF Author: Kathryn Petras
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 1101624973
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 226

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Book Description
Wretched writing is the lowest of the low; it is a felonious assault on the English language. Exuberantly excessive, it is a sin committed often by amateurs and all-too-frequently by gifted writers having an off day. In short, it’s very bad writing. Truly bad. Appallingly bad. It’s also very funny. A celebration of the worst writing imaginable, Wretched Writing includes inadvertently filthy book titles, ridiculously overwrought passages from novels, bombastic and confusing speeches, moronic oxymorons, hyperactive hyperbole, horribly inappropriate imagery in ostensibly hot sex scenes, mangled clichés, muddled metaphors, and unintended double entendres. Sit back and enjoy these deliciously dreadful samples, and try not to cringe too much.

Go: A Kidd’s Guide to Graphic Design

Go: A Kidd’s Guide to Graphic Design PDF Author: Chip Kidd
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 1523515651
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 161

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Book Description
Now in paperback: Chip Kidd's introduction to graphic design for kids.