Very British Wit

Very British Wit PDF Author: Richard Benson
Publisher: Summersdale
ISBN: 1783726806
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 191

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Book Description
With quips, quotes and insults from classic favourites William Shakespeare and Jane Austen to modern humorists Stephen Fry and Billy Connolly, this delightful book will ensure you’re never at a loss for the perfect witticism.

Great British Wit

Great British Wit PDF Author: Rosemarie Jarski
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 0091906318
Category : English wit and humor
Languages : en
Pages : 466

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Book Description
Arranged thematically--from Class and Character, Sex and Snobbery, to the Foreigner's Eye View--here is the definitive collection of the British nation's funniest quotations. Among the many great and good who dazzle us with their wit are Martin Amis, Jane Austen, Billy Connolly, Quentin Crisp, Roald Dahl, John Lennon, Queen Victoria, and Oscar Wilde.

Very British Problems

Very British Problems PDF Author: Rob Temple
Publisher: Sphere
ISBN: 0751556076
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 288

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Book Description
There's an epidemic sweeping the nation Symptoms include: *Acute embarrassment at the mere notion of 'making a fuss' *Extreme awkwardness when faced with any social greeting beyond a brisk handshake *An unhealthy preoccupation with meteorology Doctors have also reported several cases of unnecessary apologising, an obsessive interest in correct queuing etiquette and dramatic sighing in the presence of loud teenagers on public transport. If you have experienced any of these symptoms, you may be suffering from VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS. VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS are highly contagious. There is no known cure. Rob Temple's hilarious new book reveals all the ways in which we are a nation of socially awkward but well-meaning oddballs, struggling to make it through every day without apologising to an inanimate object. Take comfort in misfortunes of others. You are not alone.

The Mammoth Book of Great British Humour

The Mammoth Book of Great British Humour PDF Author: Michael Powell
Publisher: Hachette UK
ISBN: 1849016690
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 490

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Book Description
A doorstopper of a collection of the very best of both contemporary and classic British wit and humour. From Monty Python's 'Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more . . .' to Dan Antopolski's 'Hedgehogs. Why can't they just share the hedge?'. From George Bernard Shaw to Michael McIntyre, from Eric Morecombe to Omid Djalili, and from Oscar Wilde to Jimmy Carr, a side-splitting look at Britain, the British and life in general. Including these gems from Britain's finest comedians: I was delighted to learn that my friend's schadenfreude was not as satisfying as mine. Armando Iannucci. I went on a girls' night out recently. The invitation said 'dress to kill'. I went as Rose West. Zoe Lyons For a while I was the perfect mother. Then the Pethidine wore off. Jenny Eclair. My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that. Jack Dee. Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings because it's hardly ever for them? Harry Hill. Arse-gravy of the very worst kind. Stephen Fry on The Da Vinci Code. You have to come up with this shit every year. Last week I just wrote "I still love you, see last year's card for full details." Michael McIntyre on Valentines Day. I went to the doctor and he said, 'You've got hypochondria.' I said, 'Not that as well!'Tim Vine. I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge. Spike Milligan. When someone close to you dies, move seats. Peter Kay. My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden. Eric Morecambe. My dad's dying wish was to have his family around him. I can't help thinking he would have been better off with more oxygen. Jimmy Carr. Eighty-two point six per cent of statistics are made up on the spot. Vic Reeves. A bird in the hand invariably shits on your wrist. Billy Connolly. Getting divorced isn't like a bereavement at all, because if he's died, I'd have had me mortgage paid, and I could've danced on his grave. Sarah Millican. My greatest hero is Nelson Mandela: incarcerated for 25 years, he was released in 1990, he's been out about 18 years now and he hasn't re-offended. Ricky Gervais. If you want to confuse a girl, buy her a pair of chocolate shoes. Milton Jones. Phil Collins is losing his hearing, making him the luckiest man at a Phil Collins Concert. Simon Amstell. We'll continue our investigation into the political beliefs of nudists. We've already noticed a definite swing to the left. Ronnie Barker. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts. The psychiatrist says, "Well, I can clearly see your nuts. Tommy Cooper

Elements of Wit

Elements of Wit PDF Author: Benjamin Errett
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0698153863
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 258

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Book Description
Got wit? We’ve all been in that situation where we need to say something clever, but innocuous; smart enough to show some intelligence, without showing off; something funny, but not a joke. What we need in that moment is wit—that sparkling combination of charm, humor, confidence, and most of all, the right words at the right time. Elements of Wit is an engaging book that brings together the greatest wits of our time, and previous ones from Oscar Wilde to Nora Ephron, Winston Churchill to Christopher Hitchens, Mae West to Louis CK, and many in between. With chapters covering the essential ingredients of wit, this primer sheds light on how anyone—introverts, extroverts, wallflowers, and bon vivants—can find the right zinger, quip, parry, or retort…or at least be a little bit more interesting.

Wit's End: What Wit Is, How It Works, and Why We Need It

Wit's End: What Wit Is, How It Works, and Why We Need It PDF Author: James Geary
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 039325495X
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 202

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Book Description
Entertaining, illuminating, and entirely unique, Wit’s End “convey[s] the power of wit to refresh the mind” (Henry Hitchings, Wall Street Journal). In “this inventive and playful book” (Tom Beer, Newsday), James Geary explores every facet of wittiness, from its role in innovation to why puns are the highest form of wit. Adopting a different style for each chapter—from dramatic dialogue to sermon, heroic couplets to a barroom monologue—Geary embodies wit in all its forms. Wit’s End agilely balances psychology, folktale, visual art, and literary history with lighthearted humor and acute insight, demonstrating that wit and wisdom are really the same thing.

English Humour for Beginners

English Humour for Beginners PDF Author: George Mikes
Publisher: Penguin UK
ISBN: 0241978556
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 163

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Book Description
'To write a book is hard; to write a funny book is harder; to write a funny book both wise and funny is the prerogative of Mr. Mikes' The Times _________________________ If you want to succeed here you must be able to handle the English sense of humour. So proclaims George Mikes' timeless exploration of this curious phenomenon. Whether it's understatement, self-deprecation or plain cruelty, the three elements he identifies as essential to our sense of humour, being witty here is a way of life. Perfectly placed as an adopted Englishman himself, Mikes delivers his shrewd advice - helpfully divided into 'Theory' and 'Practice' - with a comic precision that does his chosen country proud. Drawing on a trove of examples from our rich comic canon, from Orwell ("Every joke is a tiny revolution") to Oscar Wilde, this is the essential handbook for natives and foreigners alike. Mrs Kennedy: "I don't think, Mr Churchill, that I have told you anything about my grandchildren." Winston Churchill: "For which, madam, I am infinitely grateful."

The Wit and Wisdom of Boris Johnson

The Wit and Wisdom of Boris Johnson PDF Author: Harry Mount
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
ISBN: 1472976525
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 209

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Book Description
A return to the wit and wisdom of Boris Johnson – Brexiteer, Foreign Secretary, Prime Minister. New and updated edition. 2019 – the year that Boris took on the 'lingering gloomadon-poppers', pledged to steer the UK between the 'Scylla and Charybdis of Corbyn and Farage' and into the calmer waters of political freedom. Of course there was always bound to be 'a bit of plaster coming off the ceilings of Europe's Chanceries'. Harry Mount has updated his edited collection of the Prime Minister's wit and wisdom with three new chapters dealing with Boris's time as Brexiteer-in-chief; Foreign Secretary and 'On the Threshold of Downing Street'. He describes Boris's Brexit campaign, his leadership breakdown in 2016, his ups and downs as Foreign Secretary, his time outside the political establishment, his turbulent private life and how Boris felt it was his manifest destiny to become the prime minister. So buckle up for a riotous tour of the million-pound NHS funder, golden wonder, pro-having, pro-eating blond behemoth. This is The Wit and Wisdom of Boris Johnson.

Expecting Someone Taller

Expecting Someone Taller PDF Author: Tom Holt
Publisher: Hachette+ORM
ISBN: 0316233420
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 167

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Book Description
All Malcolm Fisher did was run over a badger. Unfortunately the badger turned out to be Ingolf, last of the giants. With his dying breath he reluctantly gave Malcolm two gifts of power and made him ruler of the world.

The Wicked Wit of England

The Wicked Wit of England PDF Author: Geoff Tibballs
Publisher: Michael O'Mara Books
ISBN: 1789290317
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 161

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Book Description
Nobody does irony or sarcasm like the English. The Wicked Wit of England is celebration of British humour, featuring a collection of stories, anecdotes, quips and quotes that capture the various idiosyncrasies of the English character.

The Wit and Wisdom of the North

The Wit and Wisdom of the North PDF Author: Rosemarie Jarski
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1407029576
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 324

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Book Description
Ey up, it's not only footie, pints and pies that are better up north - the humour also takes some beating. Whether it's comics like Peter Kay, Les Dawson and Victoria Wood, telly shows like Corrie and Open All Hours, or writers like Alan Bennett and Keith Waterhouse, the funniest and best-loved invariably hail from the land of perpetual drizzle (another thing they do better). This grand collection of northern wit is packed with these favourites and more. Likely lads and lippy lasses cast a wry eye on subjects close to the heart of every northerner, including - brass, grub, graft, courting, cricket, tittle-tattle and t'weather - adding up to a feast of northern hilarity.