Author: Tommy Cooper
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1409052494
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 405
Book Description
My wife is a magician, yesterday she turned our car into a tree. A big white horse walks into a pub. The barman says, 'we have a drink named after you.' The horse says, 'what? Eric?' I said, 'waiter, what's that in my soup?' he said, 'I'd better call the boss, I can't tell one insect from another.' I'm reading a book called 'Sex Before 20'. Personally I don't like audiences. I said, 'it's serious, doctor, I've broken my arm in 20 places'. He said, 'well stop going to those places.' I call my car flattery. It gets me nowhere.
Tommy Cooper All In One Joke Book
Author: Tommy Cooper
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1409052494
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 405
Book Description
My wife is a magician, yesterday she turned our car into a tree. A big white horse walks into a pub. The barman says, 'we have a drink named after you.' The horse says, 'what? Eric?' I said, 'waiter, what's that in my soup?' he said, 'I'd better call the boss, I can't tell one insect from another.' I'm reading a book called 'Sex Before 20'. Personally I don't like audiences. I said, 'it's serious, doctor, I've broken my arm in 20 places'. He said, 'well stop going to those places.' I call my car flattery. It gets me nowhere.
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1409052494
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 405
Book Description
My wife is a magician, yesterday she turned our car into a tree. A big white horse walks into a pub. The barman says, 'we have a drink named after you.' The horse says, 'what? Eric?' I said, 'waiter, what's that in my soup?' he said, 'I'd better call the boss, I can't tell one insect from another.' I'm reading a book called 'Sex Before 20'. Personally I don't like audiences. I said, 'it's serious, doctor, I've broken my arm in 20 places'. He said, 'well stop going to those places.' I call my car flattery. It gets me nowhere.
The Tommy Cooper Joke Book
Author: Tommy Cooper
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1848091982
Category : English wit and humor
Languages : en
Pages : 178
Book Description
You've heard of the lone ranger? I'm his brother hydrangea! The other night I dreamt I was eating a ten-pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow had gone! My wife just phoned me. She said, 'I've got water in the carburettor.' I said, 'Where's the car?' She said, 'In the river.' I said to the doctor, 'Doctor, I'm losing all sense of direction. What should I do?' He said, 'Get lost.' I've got a dog, you know. I have. He's a one-man dog. He only bites me. Tommy Cooper died on stage at Her Majesty's Theatre, London, twenty-five years ago in April 1984 and is still revered today as probably the greatest comedian of the second half of the 20th century. More than just a comedian, Tommy Cooper was a born entertainer. Working in a golden age of British comedy, Cooper stood - literally - head and shoulders above the crowd, and had a magical talent for humour that defied description. With a love of laughter stemming from a magic performance gone wrong when he was in his teens, Cooper enlisted in the army in 1939 and began to perfect his comic timing on his army colleagues in the Egyptian desert. The man with the fez was born.
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1848091982
Category : English wit and humor
Languages : en
Pages : 178
Book Description
You've heard of the lone ranger? I'm his brother hydrangea! The other night I dreamt I was eating a ten-pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow had gone! My wife just phoned me. She said, 'I've got water in the carburettor.' I said, 'Where's the car?' She said, 'In the river.' I said to the doctor, 'Doctor, I'm losing all sense of direction. What should I do?' He said, 'Get lost.' I've got a dog, you know. I have. He's a one-man dog. He only bites me. Tommy Cooper died on stage at Her Majesty's Theatre, London, twenty-five years ago in April 1984 and is still revered today as probably the greatest comedian of the second half of the 20th century. More than just a comedian, Tommy Cooper was a born entertainer. Working in a golden age of British comedy, Cooper stood - literally - head and shoulders above the crowd, and had a magical talent for humour that defied description. With a love of laughter stemming from a magic performance gone wrong when he was in his teens, Cooper enlisted in the army in 1939 and began to perfect his comic timing on his army colleagues in the Egyptian desert. The man with the fez was born.
Tommy Cooper's Secret Joke Files
Author: Tommy Cooper
Publisher: Preface Publishing
ISBN: 9781848093102
Category : Stand-up comedy
Languages : en
Pages : 0
Book Description
Presents jokes on the subjects that range from 'A for Absent-minded' to 'Z for Zoo'.
Publisher: Preface Publishing
ISBN: 9781848093102
Category : Stand-up comedy
Languages : en
Pages : 0
Book Description
Presents jokes on the subjects that range from 'A for Absent-minded' to 'Z for Zoo'.
Les Dawson's Joke Book
Author: Les Dawson
Publisher: Michael O'Mara Books
ISBN: 1843179873
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 120
Book Description
The first-ever joke book from one of the UK's best-loved comedians, Les Dawson's Joke Book is a must for any fan of this perennially popular comedian.
Publisher: Michael O'Mara Books
ISBN: 1843179873
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 120
Book Description
The first-ever joke book from one of the UK's best-loved comedians, Les Dawson's Joke Book is a must for any fan of this perennially popular comedian.
The Biggest Ever Tim Vine Joke Book
Author: Tim Vine
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1409039307
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 322
Book Description
The irrepressible, hysterical, puntastical Tim Vine, star of stage and screen, treats all of us here in his first joke book. Packed full of zingers and hilarious illustrations, if this doesn't put a smile on your face, nothing will. What's not to like: The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it. I'm against hunting. I'm actually a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one. Black holes. I don't know what people see in them. So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, 'Nearest the bull goes first.' He went 'Baah' and I went 'Moo'. He said 'You're closest.' Velcro. What a rip-off. Black Beauty. He's a dark horse. I've got a sponge front door. Hey, don't knock it.
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1409039307
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 322
Book Description
The irrepressible, hysterical, puntastical Tim Vine, star of stage and screen, treats all of us here in his first joke book. Packed full of zingers and hilarious illustrations, if this doesn't put a smile on your face, nothing will. What's not to like: The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it. I'm against hunting. I'm actually a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one. Black holes. I don't know what people see in them. So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, 'Nearest the bull goes first.' He went 'Baah' and I went 'Moo'. He said 'You're closest.' Velcro. What a rip-off. Black Beauty. He's a dark horse. I've got a sponge front door. Hey, don't knock it.
The Ah-Ha Moment
Author: Martin Cohen
Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
ISBN: 1685628990
Category : Philosophy
Languages : en
Pages : 245
Book Description
Jokes are intellectual can-openers offering surprisingly powerful insights into not only how our minds work – but into how the world around us works too. Why? Well, when you think about it, a good joke requires, demands, a very special kind of deep thinking – a kind of world-upturning, no-holds-barred problem solving. It’s the same skill that produces the great insights of art and commerce, the insight that sees solutions and creates opportunities. And yes, such skills can be approached through exercises and study, but there’s no good reason to think such sensible methods work any better than having a sense of humour. So why not, at least for a moment, throw all conventional thinking to the wind, and start re-examining the world through the very special, very beautiful prism of jokes and riddles? “With wit and irony, Martin Cohen explains the basic concepts of philosophy and incidentally introduces the most famous thinkers in history.” – Der Spiegel.
Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
ISBN: 1685628990
Category : Philosophy
Languages : en
Pages : 245
Book Description
Jokes are intellectual can-openers offering surprisingly powerful insights into not only how our minds work – but into how the world around us works too. Why? Well, when you think about it, a good joke requires, demands, a very special kind of deep thinking – a kind of world-upturning, no-holds-barred problem solving. It’s the same skill that produces the great insights of art and commerce, the insight that sees solutions and creates opportunities. And yes, such skills can be approached through exercises and study, but there’s no good reason to think such sensible methods work any better than having a sense of humour. So why not, at least for a moment, throw all conventional thinking to the wind, and start re-examining the world through the very special, very beautiful prism of jokes and riddles? “With wit and irony, Martin Cohen explains the basic concepts of philosophy and incidentally introduces the most famous thinkers in history.” – Der Spiegel.
Pundamentalist
Author: Gary Delaney
Publisher: Headline
ISBN: 1472277449
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 118
Book Description
'For a collection of good old-fashioned gags, it's one of the best out there, a rich buffet of inventive wordplay that's best savoured a little at a time to fully appreciate the joy of these perfectly-constructed morsels. For original, hilarious gags you'll want to share, this is the real deal.' - Chortle 'A rollicking joyride. . . Pundamentalist has puns for the whole family: rude ones, daft ones, deft ones, stinkers and absolute belters.' - British Comedy Guide Gary Delaney, one-liner extraordinaire, has appeared on shows like Mock the Week and written for the likes of Jimmy Carr, Jason Manford, and James Corden. Now, for the first time, comes the first collection of his finest jokes. Featuring the likes of: Garden centres can't reopen fast enough for me, I've been living on borrowed thyme. We can't even afford a garden, so when my girlfriend bought us a trampoline I hit the roof. Sure everyone cares about straws killing dolphins now, but they've been breaking camels' backs for years. Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration, which explains why Prince Andrew is so stupid. Sad news: The British simile champion has died. We shall not see his like again. My mom doesn't trust my dad's secretary. I asked her why, and she just said 'I've seen her type before'. Today someone told me that I look good with a salt 'n' pepper beard, so I took that as a condiment. My French pen friend just said 'Le Monde', which means the world to me. Can anyone tell me what FOMO stands for? Everyone else seems to know. Actors have got Equity, Magicians have got the Magic Circle, but it's a shame ventriloquists don't have anyone to speak for them. Does anyone know if it's safe to dye your pubes? It's a bit of a grey area. And make sure you look out for Gary's next book, about Stockholm Syndrome: it starts off badly but by the end you'll really enjoy it . . .
Publisher: Headline
ISBN: 1472277449
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 118
Book Description
'For a collection of good old-fashioned gags, it's one of the best out there, a rich buffet of inventive wordplay that's best savoured a little at a time to fully appreciate the joy of these perfectly-constructed morsels. For original, hilarious gags you'll want to share, this is the real deal.' - Chortle 'A rollicking joyride. . . Pundamentalist has puns for the whole family: rude ones, daft ones, deft ones, stinkers and absolute belters.' - British Comedy Guide Gary Delaney, one-liner extraordinaire, has appeared on shows like Mock the Week and written for the likes of Jimmy Carr, Jason Manford, and James Corden. Now, for the first time, comes the first collection of his finest jokes. Featuring the likes of: Garden centres can't reopen fast enough for me, I've been living on borrowed thyme. We can't even afford a garden, so when my girlfriend bought us a trampoline I hit the roof. Sure everyone cares about straws killing dolphins now, but they've been breaking camels' backs for years. Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration, which explains why Prince Andrew is so stupid. Sad news: The British simile champion has died. We shall not see his like again. My mom doesn't trust my dad's secretary. I asked her why, and she just said 'I've seen her type before'. Today someone told me that I look good with a salt 'n' pepper beard, so I took that as a condiment. My French pen friend just said 'Le Monde', which means the world to me. Can anyone tell me what FOMO stands for? Everyone else seems to know. Actors have got Equity, Magicians have got the Magic Circle, but it's a shame ventriloquists don't have anyone to speak for them. Does anyone know if it's safe to dye your pubes? It's a bit of a grey area. And make sure you look out for Gary's next book, about Stockholm Syndrome: it starts off badly but by the end you'll really enjoy it . . .
The Great Saskatchewan Joke Book
Author: Joel Jeffrey
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781772761504
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 144
Book Description
If you like a good joke (and we all know you do), then you'll get a kick out of this hilarious collection that pokes fun at all things Saskatchewan. With zingers that will tickle your funny bone, these good-natured jabs are just funny enough that they will leave you rolling in the aisles. The Great Saskatchewan Joke Book will literally make you laugh out loud. Joel Jeffrey believes that if you can't laugh at yourself, then who can you laugh at?
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781772761504
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 144
Book Description
If you like a good joke (and we all know you do), then you'll get a kick out of this hilarious collection that pokes fun at all things Saskatchewan. With zingers that will tickle your funny bone, these good-natured jabs are just funny enough that they will leave you rolling in the aisles. The Great Saskatchewan Joke Book will literally make you laugh out loud. Joel Jeffrey believes that if you can't laugh at yourself, then who can you laugh at?
Take a Number!: A Tiny Ticket Dispenser
Author: Mollie Thomas
Publisher: Rp Minis
ISBN: 9780762473755
Category : Antiques & Collectibles
Languages : en
Pages : 40
Book Description
Next time you're up to your neck in nagging requests, emails, and meeting invites, give your coworkers a (not-so-subtle) hint: Take a Number! SPECIFICATIONS: Includes a mini butcher counter-style "take a number" system with 100 paper tickets, plus a digital number board to display the number currently being served INCLUDES MINI BOOK: Enjoy an illustrated mini book outlining how to tackle common office distractions, like Carol from accounting asking if you saw last night's episode of Dancing with the Stars PERFECT OFFICE GIFT: Whether it's for your boss, the office White Elephant party, or your busy coworker's birthday, this is a hilarious novelty item that's sure to delight! REALLY WORKS! As functional as it is funny and adorable, this tiny ticket dispenser might actually help you keep requests at bay
Publisher: Rp Minis
ISBN: 9780762473755
Category : Antiques & Collectibles
Languages : en
Pages : 40
Book Description
Next time you're up to your neck in nagging requests, emails, and meeting invites, give your coworkers a (not-so-subtle) hint: Take a Number! SPECIFICATIONS: Includes a mini butcher counter-style "take a number" system with 100 paper tickets, plus a digital number board to display the number currently being served INCLUDES MINI BOOK: Enjoy an illustrated mini book outlining how to tackle common office distractions, like Carol from accounting asking if you saw last night's episode of Dancing with the Stars PERFECT OFFICE GIFT: Whether it's for your boss, the office White Elephant party, or your busy coworker's birthday, this is a hilarious novelty item that's sure to delight! REALLY WORKS! As functional as it is funny and adorable, this tiny ticket dispenser might actually help you keep requests at bay
What Happened Was
Author: Jethro
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780007106066
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :
Book Description
Laugh 'til it hurts, as Jethro reveals all in his hilarious live show. Jethro reveals all in his hilarious live show. Laugh 'til it hurts as Cornwall's best-loved comic takes a look at life -- as only he can! Discover the meaning of twernt't and find out what happened when Jethro's pal, Denzil Penberthy, popped into the clock shop! Featuring Jethro at his belly laugh best -- performing live -- plus a collection of cracking sketches, this is one portion of West Country wit you won't want to miss.
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780007106066
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :
Book Description
Laugh 'til it hurts, as Jethro reveals all in his hilarious live show. Jethro reveals all in his hilarious live show. Laugh 'til it hurts as Cornwall's best-loved comic takes a look at life -- as only he can! Discover the meaning of twernt't and find out what happened when Jethro's pal, Denzil Penberthy, popped into the clock shop! Featuring Jethro at his belly laugh best -- performing live -- plus a collection of cracking sketches, this is one portion of West Country wit you won't want to miss.