The Velvet Rage

The Velvet Rage PDF Author: Alan Downs
Publisher: Da Capo Lifelong Books
ISBN: 9780738210612
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 224

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Book Description
The gay male world today is characterized by seductive beauty, artful creativity, flamboyant sexuality, and, encouragingly, unprecedented acceptability in society. Yet despite the progress of the recent past, gay men still find themselves asking, "Are we really better off?" The inevitable byproduct of growing up gay in a straight world continues to be the internalization of shame, a shame gay men may strive to obscure with a fa?ade of beauty, creativity, or material success. Drawing on contemporary psychological research, the author's own journey to be free of anger and of shame, as well as the stories of many of his friends and clients, The Velvet Rage outlines the three distinct stages to emotional well-being for gay men. Offering profoundly beneficial strategies to stop the insidious cycle of avoidance and self-defeating behavior, The Velvet Rage is an empowering book that will influence the public discourse on gay culture, and positively change the lives of gay men who read it.

The Velvet Rage

The Velvet Rage PDF Author: Alan Downs
Publisher: Da Capo Lifelong Books
ISBN: 9780738210612
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 224

Get Book Here

Book Description
The gay male world today is characterized by seductive beauty, artful creativity, flamboyant sexuality, and, encouragingly, unprecedented acceptability in society. Yet despite the progress of the recent past, gay men still find themselves asking, "Are we really better off?" The inevitable byproduct of growing up gay in a straight world continues to be the internalization of shame, a shame gay men may strive to obscure with a fa?ade of beauty, creativity, or material success. Drawing on contemporary psychological research, the author's own journey to be free of anger and of shame, as well as the stories of many of his friends and clients, The Velvet Rage outlines the three distinct stages to emotional well-being for gay men. Offering profoundly beneficial strategies to stop the insidious cycle of avoidance and self-defeating behavior, The Velvet Rage is an empowering book that will influence the public discourse on gay culture, and positively change the lives of gay men who read it.

The Velvet Rage

The Velvet Rage PDF Author: Alan Downs
Publisher: Da Capo Lifelong Books
ISBN: 0738215856
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 274

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Book Description
In this moving guide, a gay man shares his personal journey of letting go of shame and moving forward with self-compassion and healing. Even though an entire generation of men have openly and freely come out of the closet, gay men still struggle with self-acceptance. Sexually transmitted diseases, depression, and suicide occur more frequently for gay men than straight men. It doesn’t have to be this way. Through brave individual stories and compassionate analysis, The Velvet Rage explores how shame is insidious, and can be traced back to childhood feelings of “otherness”. Drawing on contemporary psychological research, Alan Downs offers a path to emotional well-being and an end to self-defeating behavior. Velvet Rage is an empowering book you'll wish you read long ago. It’s not too late to begin the healing process.

Out of the Shadows

Out of the Shadows PDF Author: Walt Odets
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux
ISBN: 0374719322
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 233

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Book Description
A moving exploration of how gay men construct their identities, fight to be themselves, and live authentically It goes without saying that even today, it’s not easy to be gay in America. While young gay men often come out more readily, even those from the most progressive of backgrounds still struggle with the legacy of early-life stigma and a deficit of self-acceptance, which can fuel doubt, regret, and, at worst, self-loathing. And this is to say nothing of the ongoing trauma wrought by AIDS, which is all too often relegated to history. Drawing on his work as a clinical psychologist during and in the aftermath of the epidemic, Walt Odets reflects on what it means to survive and figure out a way to live in a new, uncompromising future, both for the men who endured the upheaval of those years and for the younger men who have come of age since then, at a time when an HIV epidemic is still ravaging the gay community, especially among the most marginalized. Through moving stories—of friends and patients, and his own—Odets considers how experiences early in life launch men on trajectories aimed at futures that are not authentically theirs. He writes to help reconstruct how we think about gay life by considering everything from the misleading idea of “the homosexual,” to the diversity and richness of gay relationships, to the historical role of stigma and shame and the significance of youth and of aging. Crawling out from under the trauma of destructive early-life experience and the two epidemics, and into a century of shifting social values, provides an opportunity to explore possibilities rather than live with limitations imposed by others. Though it is drawn from decades of private practice, activism, and life in the gay community, Odets’s work achieves remarkable universality. At its core, Out of the Shadows is driven by his belief that it is time that we act based on who we are and not who others are or who they would want us to be. We—particularly the young—must construct our own paths through life. Out of the Shadows is a necessary, impassioned argument for how and why we must all take hold of our futures.

Straight Jacket

Straight Jacket PDF Author: Matthew Todd
Publisher: Black Swan
ISBN: 9780552778404
Category : Gay men
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Written by Matthew Todd, editor of Attitude, the UK's best-selling gay magazine, Straight Jacket is a revolutionary clarion call for gay men, the wider LGBT community, their friends and family. Part memoir, part ground-breaking polemic, it looks beneath the shiny facade of contemporary gay culture and asks if gay people are as happy as they could be - and if not, why not? In an attempt to find the answers to this and many other difficult questions, Matthew Todd explores why statistics show a disproportionate number of gay people suffer from mental health problems, including anxiety, depression, addiction, suicidal thoughts and behaviour, and why significant numbers experience difficulty in sustaining meaningful relationships.

Becoming a Man

Becoming a Man PDF Author: Paul Monette
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 1480473863
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 252

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Book Description
The National Book Award–winning coming-out memoir. “One of the most complex, moral, personal, and political books to have been written about gay life” (LA Weekly). Paul Monette grew up all-American, Catholic, overachieving . . . and closeted. As a child of the 1950s, a time when a kid suspected of being a “homo” would routinely be beaten up, Monette kept his secret throughout his adolescence. He wrestled with his sexuality for the first thirty years of his life, priding himself on his ability to “pass” for straight. The story of his journey to adulthood and to self-acceptance with grace and honesty, this intimate portrait of a young man’s struggle with his own desires is witty, humorous, and deeply felt. Before his death of complications from AIDS in 1995, Monette was an outspoken activist crusading for gay rights. Becoming a Man shows his courageous path to stand up for his own right to love and be loved. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Paul Monette including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the Paul Monette papers of the UCLA Library Special Collections.

Why Does This Keep Happening To Me?

Why Does This Keep Happening To Me? PDF Author: Alan Downs
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0743223691
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 273

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Book Description
I Can't Believe This Is Happening to Me...Again! "Why does this keep happening to me?" is the question most commonly asked by those entering psychotherapy for the first time. Whether we can't stop dating the wrong guy or taking the wrong job, gaining and losing weight, or getting into debt, it is the repeating patterns in our lives that cause us the most pain and frustration. Now author and psychologist Alan Downs shows us all how we can break these cycles...for good! After fifteen years of working with people from all walks of life -- including executives, homemakers, young adults, and the elderly -- Dr. Downs has identified seven crises that every one of us will face at some point during our lifetime. In Why Does This Keep Happening to Me?, Downs uses his revolutionary Crisis Quiz to show us which of these crises is at the root of our repeating behavior. Downs includes quizzes, exercises, and real-life examples to help us resolve universal issues, including Who will I share my life with? Why can't I believe in myself? How can I become my own person? What does it all mean? With wisdom and compassion, Downs leads us from recognition to recovery, showing us how we can apply our new knowledge and triumph over destructive patterns, breaking the cycle once and for all.

Velvet

Velvet PDF Author: Temple West
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 1250063612
Category : Young Adult Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 417

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Book Description
Equal parts steamy and funny, with a few genuinely creepy moments, this paranormal romance has everything -- compelling characters, plenty of witty banter, and a romance that just might be to die for. After losing both her parents before age 17, aspiring designer Caitlin Holte feels like her whole world has been turned upside down, and that was before she accidentally attracted the attention of a demon. Then, she learns that her hot, bad-boy neighbor, Adrian -- who might have just saved her life -- is actually a half-demon vampire. Suddenly, Caitlin is stuck with a vampire bodyguard who feels that the best way to protect her is to become her pretend boyfriend. Trouble is, Caitlin is starting to fall in love for real, while Adrian can never love a human. Caitlin trusts Adrian to keep her safe from his demon father, but will he be able to protect her heart? Temple West’s debut novel Velvet is a sexy, delightful romance chosen by readers like you for Macmillan's young adult imprint Swoon Reads. Praise for Velvet: “This romantic Twilight readalike shines with credible dialogue and fully developed characters.” —School Library Journal "Velvet is fun and very entertaining with snappy dialogue, awesome characters and some solid teen angst.” —The Windy Pages

Coming Out of Shame

Coming Out of Shame PDF Author: Gershen Kaufman
Publisher: Doubleday Books
ISBN:
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 312

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Book Description
Gershen Kaufman and Lev Raphael expose the role shame has come to play in the lives of gay men and lesbians. The authors break the silence surrounding gay and lesbian experience so that individuals can "come out" of shame and begin a path toward personal growth and acceptance.

10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives

10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives PDF Author: Joe Kort
Publisher: ReadHowYouWant.com
ISBN: 1459608429
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 322

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Book Description
Openly gay therapist Joe Kort provides 10 powerful and positive steps gay men can take to isolate and overcome self-defeating behavior patterns, and move in healthier and more rewarding directions: Take Charge of Their Own Lives Affirm Themselves by Coming Out Resolve Differences With Parents and Relatives 'Graduate' From Delayed Adolescence Avoid - or Overcome - Sexual Addiction -Learn from Successful Mentors Whove Been There, Done That Take Advantage of 'Therapy Workouts' Achieve - and Maintain - Rewarding Relationships Understand the Stages of Loves Commit to Their Partner.These solid and reliable 'Top 10' life steps that have been most helpful to Joe Korts clients in his 16 years of working with hundreds of gay men, are presented in an engaging and easy-to-understand manner and are supplemented by case histories from his practice. These are time-tested, practical decisions gay men can make in their search for emotional, sexual and personal fulfillment

Discomfortable

Discomfortable PDF Author: A.J. Bond
Publisher: North Atlantic Books
ISBN: 1623175577
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 346

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Book Description
The go-to guide to understand and unpack shame: what it is, why we feel it, and how to undo the lies it tells us about ourselves. Are you ready to get Discomfortable? This is a book about shame: what it is, why we have it, and how we can break its hold on our happiness. We all know shame: it's that feeling that tells us that somehow, who we are is inherently wrong. It's more than embarrassment or regret: it shakes us to the core. And most of all, it tells us that we need to be, feel, and act differently in order to be seen, loved, and accepted. Author and "shame-ed" coach AJ Bond takes us through his own shame breakthrough, sharing how he went from I'd rather die than be gay to uncovering and reclaiming his inherent wholeness and worth. With unexpected humor, warmth, and candid personal stories, Bond shows readers: Why shame shows up--the trauma, fixed mindsets, and messaging that give it a foothold How shame tricks you into believing there's something wrong with you, even when you're perfectly right The evolutionary reasons we humans developed a sense of shame (and why it doesn't serve us today) How to manage and deprogram shame through connection, gratitude, and empowered choice How we can re-parent ourselves, be fully seen, and feel fully loved Bond shines a light on this feeling that doesn't want to be seen, heard, or named--and invites us to bring our own shame into the open and release it to reclaim and reframe our lives in a powerful new way.