The Inventions of the Idiot PDF Download
Are you looking for read ebook online? Search for your book and save it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. Download The Inventions of the Idiot PDF full book. Access full book title The Inventions of the Idiot by John Bangs. Download full books in PDF and EPUB format.
Author: John Bangs
Publisher: Litres
ISBN: 5040492936
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 109
Get Book Here
Book Description
Author: John Bangs
Publisher: Litres
ISBN: 5040492936
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 109
Get Book Here
Book Description
Author: Bangs John Kendrick
Publisher: Hardpress Publishing
ISBN: 9781318984824
Category : History
Languages : en
Pages : 106
Get Book Here
Book Description
Unlike some other reproductions of classic texts (1) We have not used OCR(Optical Character Recognition), as this leads to bad quality books with introduced typos. (2) In books where there are images such as portraits, maps, sketches etc We have endeavoured to keep the quality of these images, so they represent accurately the original artefact. Although occasionally there may be certain imperfections with these old texts, we feel they deserve to be made available for future generations to enjoy.
Author: John Kendrick Bangs
Publisher: CreateSpace
ISBN: 9781515316879
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 82
Get Book Here
Book Description
"The Inventions of the Idiot" from John Kendrick Bangs. American author, editor and satirist (1862-1922).
Author: John Kendrick Bangs
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category : American fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 200
Get Book Here
Book Description
Author: John Kendrick Bangs
Publisher: Independently Published
ISBN: 9781091898103
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 62
Get Book Here
Book Description
This short humorous novel by the American author, editor and satirist was first published in 1904.
Author: John Kendrick Bangs
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 110
Get Book Here
Book Description
This short humorous novel by the American author, John Kendrick Bangs, was first published in 1904.
Author: John Bangs
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781548800901
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 104
Get Book Here
Book Description
It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized. "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp. "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned. We, however, must grin and bear it, because our esteemed landlady cannot find anywhere in this town a woman better suited for the labors of the kitchen than the blank she has had the misfortune to draw in the culinary lottery, familiarly known to us, her victims, as Bridget." "This is an exceptional case," said Mr. Pedagog. "We haven't had a steak like this before in several weeks." "True," returned the Idiot. "This is a sirloin, I believe. The last steak we had was a rump steak, and it was not burned to a crisp, I admit. It was only boiled, if I remember rightly, by mistake; Bridget having lost her fifth consecutive cousin in ten days the night before, and being in consequence so prostrated that she could not tell a gridiron from a lawn-mower." "Well, you know the popular superstition, Mr. Idiot," said the Poet. "The devil sends the cooks." "I don't believe it," retorted the Idiot. "That's one of those proverbs that haven't a particle of truth in 'em-nor a foundation in reason either, like 'Never look a gift horse in the mouth.' Of all absurd advice ever given to man by a thoughtless thinker, that, I think, bears the palm. I know a man who didn't look a gift horse in the mouth, and the consequence was that he accepted a horse that was twenty-eight years old. The beast died in his stables three days later, and the beneficiary had to pay five dollars to have him carted away. As for the devil sending the cooks, I haven't any faith in the theory. Any person who had come from the devil would know how to manage a fire better than ninety-nine per cent. of the cooks ever born. It would be a good thing if every one of 'em were forced to serve an apprenticeship with the Prince of Darkness. However, steak like this serves a good purpose. It serves to bind our little circle more firmly together. There's nothing like mutual suffering to increase the sympathy that should exist between men situated as we are; and as for Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog, I wish her to understand distinctly that I am criticising the cook and not herself. If this particular dainty had been prepared by her own fair hand, I doubt not I should want more of it." "I thank you," returned the landlady, somewhat mollified by this remark. "If I had more time I should occasionally do the cooking myself, but, as it is, I am overwhelmed with work." "I can bear witness to that," observed Mr. Whitechoker. "Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog is one of the most useful ladies in my congregation. If it were not for her, many a heathen would be going without garments to-day." "Well, I don't like to criticise," said the Idiot, "but I think the heathen at home should be considered before the heathen abroad. If your congregation would have a guild to look after such heathen as the Poet and the Doctor and myself, I am convinced it would be more appreciated by those who benefited by its labors than it is at present by the barbarians who try to wear the misfits it sends out.
Author: John Kendrick
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781479275618
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 84
Get Book Here
Book Description
"The familiar boarding house Idiot of Mr. John Kendrick Bangs reappears in a new volume of humorous conversations entitled, "The Inventions of the Idiot". These talks around the breakfast table of Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog, in which the utterances of the Idiot dominate those of the other boarders in length and profundity, relate to the evils of bad cooking, the possibility of a trolly line across the Atlantic to banish seasickness, the desirability of converting the Idiot's intellectual gifts into a universal trust, the ineffectiveness of "university extensive", as the Idiot see it and the desirability of "social expansion", the wealth of beggers, a scheme for "progressive waffles" at the breakfast table, the need of a clearing house for poetry and other subjects of equal importance." Mr. Bang's Idiot, an amiable, quick-witted loquncious personage, has retained his individuality a long term of years, though it be severly tested by the keen public demand for veracious reports of his utterances. Few personages, even in fiction, could hold their own so well while talking so much as this cheerful Idiot. He is always clear minded and alive to the signs of the times."
Author: John Kendrick John Kendrick Bangs
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781982016654
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 56
Get Book Here
Book Description
John Kendrick Bangs (May 27, 1862 - January 21, 1922) was an American author, humorist, editor and satirist.He was born in Yonkers, New York. His father Francis Nehemiah Bangs was a lawyer in New York City, as was his brother, Francis S. Bangs.He went to Columbia College from 1880 to 1883 where he became editor of Columbia's literary magazine, Acta Columbia, and contributed short anonymous pieces to humor magazines. After graduation in 1883 with a Bachelor of Philosophy degree in Political Science, Bangs entered Columbia Law School but left in 1884 to become Associate Editor of Life under Edward S. Martin. Bangs contributed many articles and poems to the magazine between 1884 and 1888. During this period, Bangs published his first books.
Author: John Kendrick Bangs
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 62
Get Book Here
Book Description
"The familiar boarding house Idiot of Mr. John Kendrick Bangs reappears in a new volume of humorous conversations entitled, "The Inventions of the Idiot". These talks around the breakfast table of Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog, in which the utterances of the Idiot dominate those of the other boarders in length and profundity, relate to the evils of bad cooking, the possibility of a trolly line across the Atlantic to banish seasickness, the desirability of converting the Idiot's intellectual gifts into a universal trust, the ineffectiveness of "university extensive", as the Idiot see it and the desirability of "social expansion", the wealth of beggers, a scheme for "progressive waffles" at the breakfast table, the need of a clearing house for poetry and other subjects of equal importance." Mr. Bang's Idiot, an amiable, quick-witted loquncious personage, has retained his individuality a long term of years, though it be severly tested by the keen public demand for veracious reports of his utterances. Few personages, even in fiction, could hold their own so well while talking so much as this cheerful Idiot. He is always clear minded and alive to the signs of the times."
