Author: Steven D. Price
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1493041207
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 343
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Book Description
Here are1,237 laugh-out-loud quotes, quips, and jokes, all in one packed-to-the-brim volume. Yes, folks, sit back and enjoy this collection of inadvertent gaffes, thigh-slappers, puns, and everything and anything else that'll tickle your funny bone. There’s something old, something new, something stolen, and something blue—from favorite comedians, sports and political figures, and literary wits. There are even giggles for the kids and groaners for the grown-ups. Just a few among the 1,237 funniest things ever said: “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.”—Rita Rudner “I don’t know if it’s good for baseball, but it sure beats the hell out of rooming with Phil Rizzuto.”—Yogi Berra on being told that Joe DiMaggio was to marry Marilyn Monroe “I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.”—Malcolm Forbes “The Dalai Lama visited the White House and told the President that he could teach him to find a higher state of consciousness. Then, after talking to Bush for a few minutes, he said, ‘You know what? Let’s just grab lunch.’”—Bill Maher
Author: Glenn W. Martin
Publisher: iUniverse
ISBN: 0595792987
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 212
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Book Description
This collection of stories was written for only one purpose-to make you laugh! These stories are not aimed at your mind, but at your funny bone. They are not supposed to make you smarter or wiser, but might keep you from taking yourself and life too seriously. When enjoying these stories, you may venture into restaurants or churches, attend weddings or funerals, and spend some time in the Army. And you may meet people who did not intend to be funny, but did funny things. These stories should put a smile on your face, and a chuckle in your voice. And if you laugh out loud, that would be okay, too. Laughter is not only good for your health, but it also does wonders for your spirit and your soul.
Author: MM Creative Notebooks
Publisher: Independently Published
ISBN: 9781726734400
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 104
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Book Description
Kids say the funniest things. Keep track of those special memories with this cute notebook. You'll love looking back and remembering those times when your kids had you rolling on the floor with laughter or having you blush with embarrassment. Every moment is special so grab this journal and keep notes, you'll be glad you did! It's the perfect gift for new moms, parents of toddlers and small children or any family member who wants to look back on those special times with the kids they dearly love. 6x9 Paperback Bound Book 122 pages Find other kids quote journal designs and different notebooks by selecting the hyperlink for "authors name" near the top of this listing.
Author: Ken Garber
Publisher: Xlibris Corporation
ISBN: 1462820425
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 126
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Book Description
KEN GARBER has worked as a reporter and advertising professional in the newspaper industry in the Baltimore-Washington area for the past 15 years. He has a love/hate relationship with e-mails. He loves the ones that made it into this book and hates all the ones that he has read thoroughly only to find out he never needed the info contained within. The rest fall somewhere in between. Despite the book title (I did check with HR to make sure the company has a sense of humor), he does work pretty hard for The Herald-Mail Newspaper Company in Hagerstown, Maryland, one of the finest community newspapers on the planet. When not at work, he lives in the same town with his beautiful and brilliant wife Kelli and handsome son Chase.
Author: Joey Acker
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781951046095
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :
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Book Description
OH NO!!! You found The Worst Book in the Whole Entire World! Well, since you're already here I may as well tell you about it... Poor Nameless tries to explain to the reader why this book is simply the WORST book in the whole entire world. Will he succeed in his noble quest? Is he the reason this book is the worst?? Will it have a happy ending or the worst ending ever??? The Worst Book in the Whole Entire World is a humorous and witty tale for young and seasoned readers. Whatever you do though, don't read it out loud! You may catch wind of these words: toot, stinky, booger, and booty. You've been warned, but you'll still want to see what happens next!
Author: Nath Roye
Publisher: Allen & Unwin
ISBN: 1761505130
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 267
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Book Description
Outrageous, hilarious, soon to be banned, Funny Stuff No One Asked For is a collection of jokes, yarns and other stuff to make your friends laugh (or hate you), from award-winning Aussie radio presenters Jimmy and Nath. Top-rating radio larrikins and self-proclaimed funnymen Jimmy & Nath are on a mission to make you laugh–whether you like it or not. Cringe-worthy dad jokes. Creative insults and nicknames for the workplace. Pick-up lines you really, really, really shouldn't use, and side-splitting stories from your favourite celebs. The funny stuff within these pages has a 99%* chance of brightening your day, helping you get lucky, improving your watercooler chat and, in some cases, earning you a slap in the face. It's the book of unexpected joy that nobody asked for, but everyone needs. *Results may vary; consult your GP if symptoms persist. 'RUN NOW FOR THIS BOOK. GO GET IT BEFORE IT GOES. AND BUY YOUR OWN BOOK, DON'T READ ANYONE ELSE'S!' JESSICA MAUBOY (SINGER/ONE OF THE LOVELIEST HUMANS ON THE PLANET/AUSTRALIA'S SWEETHEART) 'YEAH THEY ARE PRETTY FUNNY, THESE GUYS ... SO STOP READING THIS AND BUY THE BOOK.' AMY SHARK (SINGER/SONGWRITER/INCREDIBLE PARKER OF CARS) 'I RECEIVED MY COPY OF THE BOOK EARLY AND I HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO LEAVE THE HOSPITAL BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN IN STITCHES EVER SINCE.' TONES AND I (ONE OF AUSTRALIA'S MOST STREAMED ARTISTS/GRAMMY NOMINEE/OBSESSED WITH JIMMY & NATH) 'I DON'T EVEN, LIKE, READ BOOKS, BECAUSE THAT'S HARD. BUT IF IT'S A BOOK FULL OF JOKES I COULD READ THAT, AND LIKE, I WILL BUY YOUR BOOK AND I WILL READ IT. CAUSE I THINK THAT'S A FUN TIME AND AN EASY READ.' MEGHAN TRAINOR (GRAMMY-WINNING SINGER-SONGWRITER) 'THESE TWO MEN THAT I MET ON A 5-MINUTE ZOOM, EVERYBODY BUY THEIR BOOK BECAUSE THEY'RE HILARIOUS.' JOJO SIWA (SINGER/DANCING SENSATION) 'YOUR SHIT HAS ME LAUGHING OUT LOUD, CONGRATS BOYS ON ALWAYS CRACKING ME UP!' MARK CUBAN (BUSINESSMAN/FILM PRODUCER/TV PERSONALITY) 'THIS BOOK ABSOLUTELY F#%&S JUST LIKE JIMMY & NATH DO!' TEDDY SWIMS (SINGER/SUPER-SEXY MOTHERF#&%ER) 'IT'S THE FUNNIEST THING I'VE EVER READ, SO FUNNY.' DASHA (SINGER/ALLEGED CANDLE THIEF) 'I WOULD LOVE TO READ THAT BOOK.' MADISON BEER (GRAMMY-NOMINATED ARTIST) 'WHEN I FIRST MET YALL I FELT LIKE I HAD KNOWN YOU FOR YEARS–YOUR BOOK BETTER BE BETTER THEN HOW YOU PLAY CORNHOLE, CAN'T WAIT TO PLAY AGAIN!' LAINEY WILSON (GRAMMY-WINNING COUNTRY MUSIC ARTIST/SUPER-TALENTED CORNHOLE PLAYER)
Author: Calvin Trillin
Publisher: Random House Trade Paperbacks
ISBN: 0812982215
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 369
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Book Description
“Brilliant . . . The dean of American comic writers showcases his varied talents mocking the public and private lives of politicians, average citizens and himself.”—The Star-Ledger Calvin Trillin has committed blatant acts of funniness all over the place—in The New Yorker, in one-man off-Broadway shows, in his “deadline poetry” for The Nation, in comic novels, and in what USA Today called “simply the funniest regular column in journalism.” Now Trillin selects the best of his funny stuff and organizes it into topics like high finance (“My long-term investment strategy has been criticized as being entirely too dependent on Publishers Clearing House sweepstakes”) and the literary life (“The average shelf life of a book is somewhere between milk and yogurt”). He addresses the horrors of witnessing a voodoo economics ceremony and the mystery of how his mother managed for thirty years to feed her family nothing but leftovers (“We have a team of anthropologists in there now looking for the original meal”). He even skewers deserving political figures in poetry. In this, the definitive collection of his humor, Calvin Trillin is prescient, insightful, and invariably hilarious. “A literary treasure . . . There is only one Calvin Trillin, and if he didn’t exist we would have to invent him.”—The Washington Times “Funny is to Trillin what drinking is to Uncle Jed in Annie Get Your Gun—it’s what he does ‘natur’lly.’ He’s also a lot more than funny. Quite Enough of Calvin Trillin is the twenty-eighth book he’s published over not far short of a half-century, and their range of subjects is remarkable.”—Jonathan Yardley, The Washington Post “Trillin made his reputation over four decades as the author of ‘U.S. Journal’ in the New Yorker [but he] is incapable of resisting the temptation of comedy. The jokes kept on welling up and Mr. Trillin made a parallel reputation as a writer of funny stuff.”—The Economist “Wry, whip-smart, understated, and entertaining.”—The Miami Herald
Author: John C. Wolfe
Publisher: Wolfe Books
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 319
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Book Description
“The Funny Thing About Being Sober” is the punchline to "You Can't Die: A Day of Clarity." It contrasts, in a humorous, sometimes explicit way, the difference between life now, and life before rehab. Drunk or sober, the author is weird. Those around him are surprised to learn that he's even weirder sober than he was drunk. Soon after leaving rehab, the author learns what he long-suspected -- that, for decades, his alcoholism masked a different illness, one that he would now have to confront in sobriety. He does it mockingly, with an irreverent attitude and a steady stream of pranks, stunts and childish behavior, some of which make the news and go viral on Reddit and Buzzfeed. The author concedes that there was nothing funny about the final, shocking years of his alcoholism. In fact, as time goes by, he is stunned by how much he missed when he was drinking. Even though he got sober in 2013, he is baffled when he learns that many of his favorite 90s musicians died twenty years earlier. The author nearly died from alcoholism. At the time, he knew he was dying and accepted it. Having recovered, he refuses to accept his new diagnosis, opting instead to defeat it his own way. Instead of hiding his peculiarities, he puts them front and center. He is not afraid of stigmas, which makes his stories and observations of life thought-provoking and wildly entertaining.
Author: Tom Ellen
Publisher: Bonnier Zaffre Ltd.
ISBN: 1471415007
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 283
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Book Description
Nell's big dream is finally coming true. After months of failing spectacularly to land a job, twenty-one-year-old Nell has snagged a highly-sought after internship writing for her favourite comedy sketch show Punching Up. Even better? Everyone knows there's a guaranteed job at the end if you prove yourself. But the cutthroat world of television is no laughing matter, and Nell hasn't banked on there being another intern to compete against. Especially one like Charlie, who is infuriatingly good looking and a total nepo baby, gifted the opportunity by his chief executive father. With the odds stacked against her, Nell vows to do everything she can to out-perform him. But as she gets to know Charlie, she discovers there's more to her workplace rival than meets the eye . . . Full of big-hearted humour, THE FUNNY THING ABOUT LOVE is about going all out to achieve your dreams - and finding love along the way. Perfect for fans of THE HATING GAME and THE EX TALK!
Author: John Kennedy Toole
Publisher: Grove/Atlantic, Inc.
ISBN: 0802197620
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 414
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Book Description
Winner of the Pulitzer Prize “A masterwork . . . the novel astonishes with its inventiveness . . . it is nothing less than a grand comic fugue.”—The New York Times Book Review A Confederacy of Dunces is an American comic masterpiece. John Kennedy Toole's hero, one Ignatius J. Reilly, is "huge, obese, fractious, fastidious, a latter-day Gargantua, a Don Quixote of the French Quarter. His story bursts with wholly original characters, denizens of New Orleans' lower depths, incredibly true-to-life dialogue, and the zaniest series of high and low comic adventures" (Henry Kisor, Chicago Sun-Times).
