The Round Robin Letters

The Round Robin Letters PDF Author: Simon Hoggart
Publisher: Atlantic Books Ltd
ISBN: 1782399550
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 255

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Book Description
Every Christmas, unwanted round robin letters, stuffed with news of young Chloe's nauseating excellence at - well - everything, the announcement of Janet's cousin's husband's friend's divorce, or the details of Terry's colonoscopy, accumulate on doormats. One day, Simon Hoggart decided to do something about it. He mercilessly presented the most eye-popping examples of such letters in his bestseller, The Cat that Could Open the Fridge, and followed it up with The Hamster that Loved Puccini, hoping he had put a stop to them. And yet the letters, booklets and photo-montages kept on coming. So here, to drive home his message, The Round Robin Letters brings together his two collections in an anthology that will have everyone choking with laughter on their Christmas pudding.

The Round Robin Letters

The Round Robin Letters PDF Author: Simon Hoggart
Publisher: Atlantic Books Ltd
ISBN: 1782399550
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 255

Get Book Here

Book Description
Every Christmas, unwanted round robin letters, stuffed with news of young Chloe's nauseating excellence at - well - everything, the announcement of Janet's cousin's husband's friend's divorce, or the details of Terry's colonoscopy, accumulate on doormats. One day, Simon Hoggart decided to do something about it. He mercilessly presented the most eye-popping examples of such letters in his bestseller, The Cat that Could Open the Fridge, and followed it up with The Hamster that Loved Puccini, hoping he had put a stop to them. And yet the letters, booklets and photo-montages kept on coming. So here, to drive home his message, The Round Robin Letters brings together his two collections in an anthology that will have everyone choking with laughter on their Christmas pudding.

The Round Robin Letters

The Round Robin Letters PDF Author: Simon Hoggart
Publisher: Atlantic Books
ISBN: 1782399550
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 222

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Book Description
A new cover reissue of Simon Hoggart's wonderfully funny collection of round robin letters—the perfect antidote for anyone suffering from an excess of Christmas cheer. Every Christmas, unwanted round robin letters, stuffed with news of young Chloe's nauseating excellence at—well—everything, the announcement of Janet's cousin's husband's friend's divorce, or the details of Terry's colonoscopy, accumulate on doormats. One day, Simon Hoggart decided to do something about it. He mercilessly presented the most eye-popping examples of such letters in his bestseller, The Cat that Could Open the Fridge, and followed it up with The Hamster that Loved Puccini, hoping he had put a stop to them. And yet the letters, booklets, and photo-montages kept on coming. So here, to drive home his message, The Round Robin Letters brings together his two collections in an anthology that will have everyone choking with laughter on their Christmas pudding.

Cat That Could Open the Fridge

Cat That Could Open the Fridge PDF Author: Simon Hoggart
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781843543572
Category : Circular letters
Languages : en
Pages : 145

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Book Description
The advent of the home computer has made Christmas round robin letters ubiquitous. Where once the hot news about Tamsin's A levels would be sent in a short note, now it's not unusual to get a letter that includes several pages of misery--emergency operations, dead relatives, sackings, rainy holidays, and so forth--decorated with jolly snowmen and smiling Santas. Some people go further and send out whole booklets. Computers have also made it possible to include photographs of the family eating paté in their Provencal garden, or sitting in a hot tub in California. Simon Hoggart gets hundreds of round robin letters sent to him every year and has collected the funniest, most irritating, most surreal extracts into this hilarious short book. Along the way he considers why people hate these letters so much and what they tell us about the British middle classes. What, exactly, lies behind the impulse to write about Roger's decision to cycle to work for health reasons, or Jeremy's trip to Tasmania, or the replacement pet rabbit?

Hamster That Loved Puccini

Hamster That Loved Puccini PDF Author: Simon Hoggart
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781843544746
Category : English wit and humor
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Simon Hoggart is back with a new treasure-trove of Christmas round robins. And, this time, the bete noire of the Christmas post illustrates the seven deadly sins of the middle classes, including boastfulness (dazzlingly clever children who play the saxophone and ski for Britain); smugness (their job, their house, their holidays are perfect); tiny-mindedness (do we really need to be told how to start a jigsaw by looking for the straight bits?); whimsy (letters written by pets or babies); and the dreaded over-sharing, in which every illness and operation is described in minute detail. Accompanied by Hoggart's wicked commentary, The Hamster that loved Puccini invites us to ponder what compels people to write these letters, and what they tell us about them - and ourselves.

People I Want to Punch in the Throat

People I Want to Punch in the Throat PDF Author: Jen Mann
Publisher: Ballantine Books
ISBN: 0345549988
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 226

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Book Description
NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat People I want to punch in the throat: • anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer • humblebraggers • people who treat their pets like children Jen Mann doesn’t have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, her fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book. Praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat “People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened “Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes “Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves “Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear

Tiffany Girl

Tiffany Girl PDF Author: Deeanne Gist
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1451692471
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 544

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Book Description
From the bestselling author of It Happened at the Fair and Fair Play comes a compelling historical novel about a progressive “New Woman”—the girl behind Tiffany’s chapel—and the love that threatens it all. As preparations for the 1893 World’s Fair set Chicago and the nation on fire, Louis Tiffany—heir to the exclusive Fifth Avenue jewelry empire—seizes the opportunity to unveil his state-of-the-art, stained glass, mosaic chapel, the likes of which the world has never seen. But when Louis’s dream is threatened by a glassworkers’ strike months before the Fair opens, he turns to an unforeseen source for help: the female students at the Art Students League of New York. Eager for adventure, the young women pick up their skirts, move to boarding houses, take up steel cutters, and assume new identities as the “Tiffany Girls.” Tiffany Girl is the heartwarming story of the impetuous Flossie Jayne, a beautiful, budding artist who is handpicked by Louis to help complete the Tiffany chapel. Though excited to live in a boarding house when most women stayed home, she quickly finds the world is less welcoming than anticipated. From a Casanova male, to an unconventional married couple, and a condescending singing master, she takes on a colorful cast of characters to transform the boarding house into a home while racing to complete the Tiffany chapel and make a name for herself in the art world. As challenges mount, her ambitions become threatened from an unexpected quarter: her own heart. Who will claim victory? Her dreams or the captivating boarder next door?

The Christmas Letters

The Christmas Letters PDF Author: Simon Hoggart
Publisher: Atlantic
ISBN: 9781843546672
Category : Circular letters
Languages : en
Pages : 287

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Book Description
Simon Hoggart is the ultimate Christmas curmudgeon. Every year about this time, unwanted round robins, stuffed with news of young Chloe's nauseating excellence at - well - everything, the announcement of Janet's cousin's husband's friend's divorce, or the details of Terry's colonoscopy, accumulate on doormats, and Simon Hoggart decided to do something about it. In 2004, he mercilessly presented the most eye-popping examples of such letters in his bestseller, The Cat that Could Open the Fridge, and followed it up with The Hamster that Loved Puccini, hoping he had put a stop to them. And yet the letters, booklets and photo-montages kept on coming. So here, to drive home his message, The Christmas Letters brings together his two collections in an anthology that will have everyone choking with laughter on their Christmas pudding.

The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle (Scholastic Gold)

The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle (Scholastic Gold) PDF Author: Avi
Publisher: Scholastic Inc.
ISBN: 054592247X
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 232

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Book Description
Avi's treasured Newbery Honor Book now in expanded After Words edition!Thirteen-year-old Charlotte Doyle is excited to return home from her school in England to her family in Rhode Island in the summer of 1832. But when the two families she was supposed to travel with mysteriously cancel their trips, Charlotte finds herself the lone passenger on a long sea voyage with a cruel captain and a mutinous crew. Worse yet, soon after stepping aboard the ship, she becomes enmeshed in a conflict between them! What begins as an eagerly anticipated ocean crossing turns into a harrowing journey, where Charlotte gains a villainous enemy . . . and is put on trial for murder!After Words material includes author Q & A, journal writing tips, and other activities that bring Charlotte's world to life!

What I Know Now

What I Know Now PDF Author: Ellyn Spragins
Publisher: Harmony
ISBN: 0767929322
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 210

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Book Description
If you could send a letter back through time to your younger self, what would the letter say? In this moving collection, forty-one famous women write letters to the women they once were, filled with advice and insights they wish they had had when they were younger. Today show correspondent Ann Curry writes to herself as a rookie reporter in her first job, telling herself not to change so much to fit in, urging her young self, “It is time to be bold about who you really are.” Country music superstar Lee Ann Womack reflects on the stressed-out year spent recording her first album and encourages her younger self to enjoy the moment, not just the end result. And Maya Angelou, leaving home at seventeen with a newborn baby in her arms, assures herself she will succeed on her own, even if she does return home every now and then. These remarkable women are joined by Madeleine Albright, Queen Noor of Jordan, Cokie Roberts, Naomi Wolf, Eileen Fisher, Jane Kaczmarek, Olympia Dukakis, Macy Gray, and many others. Their letters contain rare glimpses into the personal lives of extraordinary women and powerful wisdom that readers will treasure. Wisdom from What I Know Now “Don’t let anybody raise you. You’ve been raised.” —Maya Angelou “Try more things. Cross more lines.” —Breena Clarke “Learn how to celebrate.” —Olympia Dukakis “You don’t have to be afraid of living alone.” —Eileen Fisher “Please yourself first . . . everything else follows.” —Macy Gray “Don’t be so quick to dismiss another human being.” —Barbara Boxer “Work should not be work.” —Mary Matalin “You can leave the work world—and come back on your own terms.” —Cokie Roberts “Laundry will wait very patiently.” —Nora Roberts “Your hair matters far, far less than you think” —Lisa Scottoline “Speak the truth but ride a fast horse.” —Kitty Kelley

Open Me Carefully

Open Me Carefully PDF Author: Emily Dickinson
Publisher: Wesleyan University Press
ISBN: 081950033X
Category : Literary Collections
Languages : en
Pages : 372

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Book Description
The 19th–century American poet’s uncensored and breathtaking letters, poems, and letter-poems to her sister-in-law and childhood friend. For the first time, selections from Emily Dickinson’s thirty-six year correspondence with her childhood friend, neighbor, and sister-in-law, Susan Huntington Dickinson, are compiled in a single volume. Open Me Carefully invites a dramatic new understanding of Emily Dickinson’s life and work, overcoming a century of censorship and misinterpretation. For the millions of readers who love Emily Dickinson’s poetry, Open Me Carefully brings new light to the meaning of the poet’s life and work. Gone is Emily as lonely spinster; here is Dickinson in her own words, passionate and fully alive. Praise for Open Me Carefully “With spare commentary, Smith . . . and Hart . . . let these letters speak for themselves. Most important, unlike previous editors who altered line breaks to fit their sense of what is poetry or prose, Hart and Smith offer faithful reproductions of the letters’ genre-defying form as the words unravel spectacularly down the original page.” —Renee Tursi, The New York Times Book Review