How To Punch A Monkey PDF Download
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Author: Brian Scolaro
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 176
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Book Description
Following his appearances on Conan and his Comedy Central special, Brian Scolaro releases his first book of his jokes, rants and musings. "How to Punch a Monkey" is a ridiculous journey through the mind of one of America's best underrated comedians. It contains his thoughts on topics like social media, death, being fat, sneezing, New York, sports, good-looking people, and the lighter side of his battle with multiple sclerosis, as well as nonsensical sketches like a conversation with his penis, the Ten Commandments writing session, an Old West Sheriff who pronounces the word "posse" wrong, and things never said by Mother Teresa. He goes from silly... I have self worth. I just don't use it. I finally had Pissghetti. It was disgusting. Frankenberry was the first openly gay monster. God must be tired of organ music by now. When I was a kid I went to John Cougar Melon Camp. It was awful. Two men in Hazmat suits just took away my pajama bottoms. I hope the guy who invented the beeping "put on your seatbelt" noise died in a horrible car crash. ...to dirty. "Tickle My B*lls Elmo." "Doesn't Aer Lingus sound like you eat somebody's p*ssy on an airplane?" "It's a "c*ck" when it's hard. A "d*ck" when it's soft. And a "pen*s" when you are at the doctor's office." Plus, a collection of little known facts about history. TODAY IN HISTORY: Aqua Man drowns. Charles Limbergh crosses the street. Gravy Boat sinks outside of Turkey. Intercourse, Pennsylvian is attacked by Masturbation, Ohio. Don't take our word for it. Check out what what these famous comedians had to say. "I've never seen Brian Scolaro not win over a crowd." - Jeff Ross "The funniest person alive." - Marc Maron "Brian has never not been funny a day in his life, so there is no way this book wouldn't be." - Ian Edwards "Brian is a masterful comic whose command of a joke was inspirational to me in my career." - Nikki Glaser "Brian has a very busy comedy mind, and the idea that he has corralled these thoughts into something we can hold in our hand is nothing short of a gift. - Tom Papa
Author: Brian Scolaro
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 176
Get Book Here
Book Description
Following his appearances on Conan and his Comedy Central special, Brian Scolaro releases his first book of his jokes, rants and musings. "How to Punch a Monkey" is a ridiculous journey through the mind of one of America's best underrated comedians. It contains his thoughts on topics like social media, death, being fat, sneezing, New York, sports, good-looking people, and the lighter side of his battle with multiple sclerosis, as well as nonsensical sketches like a conversation with his penis, the Ten Commandments writing session, an Old West Sheriff who pronounces the word "posse" wrong, and things never said by Mother Teresa. He goes from silly... I have self worth. I just don't use it. I finally had Pissghetti. It was disgusting. Frankenberry was the first openly gay monster. God must be tired of organ music by now. When I was a kid I went to John Cougar Melon Camp. It was awful. Two men in Hazmat suits just took away my pajama bottoms. I hope the guy who invented the beeping "put on your seatbelt" noise died in a horrible car crash. ...to dirty. "Tickle My B*lls Elmo." "Doesn't Aer Lingus sound like you eat somebody's p*ssy on an airplane?" "It's a "c*ck" when it's hard. A "d*ck" when it's soft. And a "pen*s" when you are at the doctor's office." Plus, a collection of little known facts about history. TODAY IN HISTORY: Aqua Man drowns. Charles Limbergh crosses the street. Gravy Boat sinks outside of Turkey. Intercourse, Pennsylvian is attacked by Masturbation, Ohio. Don't take our word for it. Check out what what these famous comedians had to say. "I've never seen Brian Scolaro not win over a crowd." - Jeff Ross "The funniest person alive." - Marc Maron "Brian has never not been funny a day in his life, so there is no way this book wouldn't be." - Ian Edwards "Brian is a masterful comic whose command of a joke was inspirational to me in my career." - Nikki Glaser "Brian has a very busy comedy mind, and the idea that he has corralled these thoughts into something we can hold in our hand is nothing short of a gift. - Tom Papa
Author: Brian Kuttel
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781735294605
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 88
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Book Description
Monkey kung fu is one of the most signature styles with its unique acting movements, dynamic gymnastic techniques, and unorthodox striking, kicking, and sweeping techniques. From high flying leaping to ground techniques, monkey kung fu is always impressive as it requires top athleticism and coordination to perform the physically demanding movements. The monkey form in the Choy Li Fut system of Kung Fu is full of unique acting, acrobatics, and applicable combinations which makes it a perfect study for any martial arts enthusiast.This book provides each movement with a full description, step-by-step instruction complete with illustrations, and common mistakes to help provide a well-rounded approach to learning the fascinating style of monkey kung fu. A must-have for the serious Choy Li Fut practitioner, Monkey Movement is also an essential reference guide for martial arts tricking and other kung fu athletes looking to improve their athleticism through movement training.
Author: Mark Lemon
Publisher:
ISBN:
Category : Caricatures and cartoons
Languages : en
Pages : 522
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Book Description
Author: Eileen Christelow
Publisher: Clarion Books
ISBN: 9780547144191
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 0
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Book Description
Jam-packed with hundreds of stickers, finger puppets, playing cards, activities, and drawing and coloring pages, this monkey-themed collection is sure to keep kids busy. Full color. Consumable.
Author: Julia Donaldson
Publisher: Pan Macmillan
ISBN: 1509812490
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 33
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Book Description
Poor little monkey! He's lost his mum. Luckily butterfly is nearby to help him find her..."I've lost my mum!" It's not too much fun being lost in the jungle, and little monkey wants his mummy. Kindly butterfly is keen to help, but they don't seem to be having much luck as the well-meaning butterfly misunderstands monkey's descriptions and leads him to all sorts of unsuitable animals! But eventually, they find ... Dad! It's just as well that he knows exactly where mum is, and she's waiting with a well-deserved cuddle. Monkey Puzzle is a clever, funny and charming tale from the unparalleled picture-book partnership of Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler, creators of The Gruffalo. This edition features the classic story with a stunning, redesigned cover and beautiful finish, making it a must-have addition to the bookshelves of all Donaldson and Scheffler fans - big and small! Also available with redesigned covers are The Gruffalo, The Gruffalo's Child, Room on the Broom, The Snail and the Whale, The Smartest Giant in Town, Charlie Cook's Favourite Book, and A Squash and a Squeeze.
Author: Hu Mei
Publisher: Funstory
ISBN: 1648979084
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 1190
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Book Description
My family is from Yunnan, the ancestors caught snakes for a living, the snake cold-blooded and insidious. His body was filled with treasures, but it was also deadly. But that was not the most terrifying thing. In order to protect me, dad wouldn't let me enter the business, but by some strange coincidence, I didn't escape the shackles of fate. Do you really think that only Gu Manpeng and the little ghost are the scariest? Snakes gather around me in a sinister way. Let me count the strange things that happened after I entered the world.
Author: Kevin Seccia
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
ISBN: 1429980915
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 257
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Book Description
The world around you is a dangerous place. It's teeming with savages, thugs, angry toddlers, and disgruntled clowns. And every one of them is secretly mulling a scenario that ends with them kicking you square in the junk. What do you do if you want to take on The Batman and live to brag about it to your kids? What do you do if a rabid alligator picks a fight with your little sister? What do you do if the beloved star of "Forrest Gump" tells you to "shut the hell up" in front of a huge crowd? You read this book. It offers simple, effective instructions for beating up zombies, robots, co-workers—anything. The only limits are your imagination... and your habit of not following through on things, and possibly your uncoordinated, at times comically frail body.
Author: Angus Hanton
Publisher: Swift Press
ISBN: 1800753896
Category : Political Science
Languages : en
Pages : 294
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Book Description
British politicians love to vaunt the benefits of the UK's supposed 'special relationship' with the US. But are we really America's economic partner – or its colony? Vassal State lays bare the extent to which US corporations own and control Britain's economy: how American business chiefs decide what we're paid, what we buy, and how we buy it. US companies have carved up Britain between them, siphoning off enormous profits, buying up our most lucrative firms and assets, and extracting huge rents from UK PLC – all while paying little or no tax. Meanwhile, policymakers, from Whitehall mandarins to NHS chiefs, shape their decisions to suit the whims of our American corporate overlords. Based on his 40 years of business experience, devastating new research, and interviews with the major players, Angus Hanton exposes why Britain has become the poor transatlantic relation – and what we can do to change it.
Author: Deborah Blum
Publisher: Oxford University Press
ISBN: 0198025408
Category : Medical
Languages : en
Pages : 325
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Book Description
The controversy over the use of primates in research admits of no easy answers. We have all benefited from the medical discoveries of primate research--vaccines for polio, rubella, and hepatitis B are just a few. But we have also learned more in recent years about how intelligent apes and monkeys really are: they can speak to us with sign language, they can even play video games (and are as obsessed with the games as any human teenager). And activists have also uncovered widespread and unnecessarily callous treatment of animals by researchers (in 1982, a Silver Spring lab was charged with 17 counts of animal cruelty). It is a complex issue, made more difficult by the combative stance of both researchers and animal activists. In The Monkey Wars, Deborah Blum gives a human face to this often caustic debate--and an all-but-human face to the subjects of the struggle, the chimpanzees and monkeys themselves. Blum criss-crosses America to show us first hand the issues and personalities involved. She offers a wide-ranging, informative look at animal rights activists, now numbering some twelve million, from the moderate Animal Welfare Institute to the highly radical Animal Liberation Front (a group destructive enough to be placed on the FBI's terrorist list). And she interviews a wide variety of researchers, many forced to conduct their work protected by barbed wire and alarm systems, men and women for whom death threats and hate mail are common. She takes us to Roger Fouts's research center in Ellensburg, Washington, where we meet five chimpanzees trained in human sign language, and we visit LEMSIP, a research facility in New York State that has no barbed wire, no alarms--and no protesters chanting outside--because its director, Jan Moor-Jankowski, listens to activists with respect and treats his animals humanely. And along the way, Blum offers us insights into the many side-issues involved: the intense battle to win over school kids fought by both sides, and the danger of transplanting animal organs into humans. "As it stands now," Blum concludes, "the research community and its activist critics are like two different nations, nations locked in a long, bitter, seemingly intractable political standoff....But if you listen hard, there really are people on both sides willing to accept and work within the complex middle. When they can be freely heard, then we will have progressed to another place, beyond this time of hostilities." In The Monkey Wars, Deborah Blum gives these people their voice.
Author: Ralph Siegel
Publisher: Oxford University Press
ISBN: 0199875928
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 144
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Book Description
ANOTHER DAY IN THE MONKEY'S BRAIN charts a neuroscientist's journey to understand the central mysteries of consciousness. Dr. Siegel began his career in the neurophysiology of vision in the 1980s, just when the field was coming into focus with the advent of new computing and imaging technologies. As a pioneer in the technique of mesoscopic imaging, he worked with some of the giants in vision science: Torsten Wiesel, Francis Crick, Tom Albright and many others. With insight and clarity, he shows how science is built on such relationships. Along the way, he gives a vivid sense of the abundant passion and creativity that drive scientists in their pursuit of understanding. From monkey to man, Dr. Siegel finds the beauty in the scientific discovery of self in mind and brain.
