Best Friends, Occasional Enemies

Best Friends, Occasional Enemies PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1429995572
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 289

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Book Description
From the New York Times bestselling writing team comes a hilarious new collection of essays that observe life from a mother/daughter perspective New York Times bestselling author Lisa Scottoline and her daughter Francesca Serritella are the best of friends—99.9% of the time. They're number one on each other's speed dial and they tell each other everything—well, almost everything. They share shoes and clothes—except one very special green jacket, which almost caused a catfight. In other words, they're just like every mother and daughter in the world. Best friends, and occasional enemies. Now they're dishing about it all—their lives, their relationship, and their carb count. Inspired by their weekly column, "Chick Wit" for The Philadelphia Inquirer, this book is one you'll have to put down—just to stop laughing. Lisa on Being a Mom - Motherhood has no expiration date. Francesca lives in the city, and I worry about her all the time. My daughter moved out, so why am I still lactating? Francesca on Being a Daughter - My mother is always right. Just ask her. Lisa on Things Every Daughter Should Know - Your mother is always thinking about you, but that's not creepy. Your mother will never forget who did you dirty in the sixth grade, for which you can thank her. And your mother will never stop asking you if you need to go to the bathroom, before you leave the house. Well, do you? Francesca on Closet Wars - My mom is a great dresser. Mostly because she's wearing my clothes. Lisa on Aging Gracefully - My sex drive is in reverse, I have more whiskers than my cat, and my estrogen replacement is tequila. Francesca on Apartment Living - When I saw a mouse, the first person I called was Mom. She told me to call my super, but I felt bad bothering him. I hate to bother people. But I love to bother my mother.

Best Friends, Occasional Enemies

Best Friends, Occasional Enemies PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1429995572
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 289

Get Book Here

Book Description
From the New York Times bestselling writing team comes a hilarious new collection of essays that observe life from a mother/daughter perspective New York Times bestselling author Lisa Scottoline and her daughter Francesca Serritella are the best of friends—99.9% of the time. They're number one on each other's speed dial and they tell each other everything—well, almost everything. They share shoes and clothes—except one very special green jacket, which almost caused a catfight. In other words, they're just like every mother and daughter in the world. Best friends, and occasional enemies. Now they're dishing about it all—their lives, their relationship, and their carb count. Inspired by their weekly column, "Chick Wit" for The Philadelphia Inquirer, this book is one you'll have to put down—just to stop laughing. Lisa on Being a Mom - Motherhood has no expiration date. Francesca lives in the city, and I worry about her all the time. My daughter moved out, so why am I still lactating? Francesca on Being a Daughter - My mother is always right. Just ask her. Lisa on Things Every Daughter Should Know - Your mother is always thinking about you, but that's not creepy. Your mother will never forget who did you dirty in the sixth grade, for which you can thank her. And your mother will never stop asking you if you need to go to the bathroom, before you leave the house. Well, do you? Francesca on Closet Wars - My mom is a great dresser. Mostly because she's wearing my clothes. Lisa on Aging Gracefully - My sex drive is in reverse, I have more whiskers than my cat, and my estrogen replacement is tequila. Francesca on Apartment Living - When I saw a mouse, the first person I called was Mom. She told me to call my super, but I felt bad bothering him. I hate to bother people. But I love to bother my mother.

Meet Me at Emotional Baggage Claim

Meet Me at Emotional Baggage Claim PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1250025079
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 274

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Book Description
From the bestselling mother/daughter writing duo comes another hilarious collection of essays about motherhood, daughterhood, womanhood, and "does this hood look good on me?" Love and guilt are thick in the Scottoline/Serritella household, and Lisa and Francesca's mother-daughter-turned-best-friends bond will strike a familiar note to many. But now that Lisa is a suburban empty nester and Francesca is an independent twentysomething in the big city, they have to learn how to stay close while living apart. How does a mother's love translate across state lines and over any semblance of personal boundaries? You'll laugh out loud as they face off over the proper technique for packing dishes, the importance of bringing a coat in the summertime, and the dos and don'ts of dating at any age. Add feisty octogenarian Mother Mary to the mix, and you have a Molotov cocktail of estrogen, opinions, and fun. The stories in Meet Me at Emotional Baggage Claim will make you laugh, cry, and call your mother, daughter, and all your girlfriends.

My Nest Isn't Empty, It Just Has More Closet Space

My Nest Isn't Empty, It Just Has More Closet Space PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1429941812
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 258

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Book Description
The incomparable Lisa Scottoline, along with daughter Francesca, is back with more wild and wonderful wit and wisdom: My Nest Isn't Empty, It Just Has More Closet Space. Critics and readers loved Lisa Scottoline's first collection of true-life stories, which only encouraged her—now she's back with these all-new, exciting adventures. She's farther down the road now, and the scenery has changed—ex-husbands Thing One and Thing Two are in her rear-view mirror, daughter Francesca has moved into an apartment, and Lisa's finding the silver lining in her empty nest, which has lots more room for her shoes. And some things have stayed the same—Mother Mary is still the feistiest octogenarian on the planet, who won't part with her recipe for tomato sauce or her thirty-year old bra. In this book Lisa and Francesca spill all their family secrets—which sound a lot like yours, if you understand that three generations of women is the formula for spontaneous combustion. Inspired by her weekly column entitled, "Chick Wit" for The Philadelphia Inquirer, this is a book you'll have to put down—just to stop laughing.

Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog

Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 9780312649432
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 324

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Book Description
This one's for you, extraordinary ordinary women everywhere It's time for seriously hilarious girl-talk with New York Times bestselling author Lisa Scottoline. She's shared this collection of scenes from her real life, and she bets her life sounds a lot like yours . . . if you crave carbs, can't find jeans that fit, and still believe that these two things are unrelated. Pick up this book--you'll laugh, you'll cry, and you'll swear off pantyhose. Here are some examples of Lisa's wit and wisdom: "Everybody has their pornography, and mine is the real estate ads." "We'll get universal health care before we get beauty salons open on Mondays, and that's backwards. Ask any woman if she'd rather have a haircut or a mammogram, and you'll see what I mean." "Mothers are a natural force, and maybe an alternative source of fuel." "Lately there's been talk about a religion that allows polygamy, so that a man can have as many wives as he pleases. Where is the religion that allows a woman to have as many husbands as she pleases?" "I have never been in an accident, if you don't count my two marriages." "My mother taught us that if you eat baked beans from a can that has dents, you'll die of botulism. This was before people injected botulism into their faces. Nowadays, the dented can will kill you, but you'll look young." Inspired by her wildly popular column in The Philadelphia Inquirer entitled "Chick Wit," Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog is a book you'll have to put down--just to stop laughing.

Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat?

Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat? PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 1250059941
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 301

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Book Description
"Lisa and Francesca are back with another collection of warm and witty stories that will strike a chord with every woman. This five book series is among the best reviewed humor books published today and has been compared to the late greats, Erma Bombeck and Nora Ephron. Delia Ephron said of the fifth book in the series, Have a Nice Guilt Trip, "Lisa and Francesca, mother and daughter, bring you the laughter of their lives once again and better than ever. You will identify with these tales of guilt and fall in love with them and fierce (grand)Mother Mary." This sixth volume will not disappoint as it hits the humorous and poignant note that fans have come to expect from the beloved mother-daughter duo"--

I See Life Through Rosé-Colored Glasses

I See Life Through Rosé-Colored Glasses PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1250163056
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 349

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Book Description
"In I See Life Through Rosé-Colored Glasses, the bestselling mother/daughter pair is back with another hilarious and heartfelt collection of essays about the possibilities and pitfalls of everyday life."--

Have a Nice Guilt Trip

Have a Nice Guilt Trip PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1466834560
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 288

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Book Description
Everyone's favorite mother-daughter writing duo is back with a new collection of warm and witty stories, Lisa Scottoline and Francesca Serritella's Have a Nice Guilt Trip! This four book series is among the best reviewed humor books published today and has been compared to the late greats, Erma Bombeck and Nora Ephron. Booklist raved of the third book in the series, Meet Me At Emotional Baggage Claim, "readers can count on an ab-toning laugh session, a silly giggle, a sympathetic sigh, and a lump in the throat as life's moments are rehashed through the keen eyes and wits of this lovable mother-daughter duo." This fourth volume, Have a Nice Guilt Trip, maintains the same sterling standard of humor and poignancy as Lisa and Francesca continue on the road of life acquiring men and puppies. Ok, to be honest, Lisa is acquiring the puppies, while Francesca is lucky enough to have dates with actual men. They leave it to the listeners to decide which is more desirable and/or or easier to train.

Loyalty

Loyalty PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0525539832
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 465

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Book Description
#1 bestselling author Lisa Scottoline presents Loyalty, an emotional, action-packed epic of love and justice, set during the rise of the Mafia in Sicily. Loyalty can save a soul—or destroy one. Franco Fiorvanti is a handsome lemon grower toiling on the estate of a baron. He dreams of owning his own grove, but the rigid class system of Sicily thwarts his ambition. Determined to secure a better future, Franco will do anything to prove his loyalty to the baron. But when the baron asks him to kidnap a little boy named Dante, Franco makes a decision that will change his life—and even the history of Sicily—forever. Gaetano Catalano is an idealistic young lawyer whose devotion to justice is tantamount to a calling. He’s a member of the Beati Paoli, a real-life secret society of aristocrats who investigate crime in Palermo, a city riddled with graft. Gaetano sets out to find the boy and punish the kidnapper, but his mission leads him to a darker place than he had ever imagined. Meanwhile, Mafalda Pancari is a new mother rejoicing at the birth of her daughter, Lucia, when disaster strikes. And Alfredo D’Antonio is a reclusive goatherd under constant threat of being discovered as a Jew. How the lives of these unforgettable characters collide makes Loyalty an epic tale of good versus evil, as the story twists and turns to its monumental showdown. Readers will be transported to the dramatic and ruggedly beautiful island of Sicily, the jewel of the Mediterranean, where lush lemon groves and mouth-watering cuisine contrast with a turbulent history of colonization and corruption. Scottoline brings her decades of thriller writing to historical fiction, creating in Loyalty a singular novel that no reader will be able to put down.

What Happened to the Bennetts

What Happened to the Bennetts PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: Bedford Square Publishers
ISBN: 1835010237
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 287

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Book Description
From #1 bestselling author Lisa Scottoline comes a pulse-pounding new novel. Your family has been attacked. Now you have to choose between law... and justice. Jason Bennett is a suburban dad whose life takes a horrific turn. He is driving his family home when a pickup truck begins tailgating them. Suddenly two men jump from the pickup and pull guns on Jason, demanding the car. A horrific flash of violence changes his life forever. Later that awful night, Jason and his family receive a visit from the FBI. The agents tell them that the carjackers were members of a dangerous drug-trafficking organization — and now Jason and his family are in their crosshairs. The agents advise the Bennetts to enter the witness protection program. But WITSEC was not designed to protect law-abiding families. Trapped in an unfamiliar life, the Bennetts begin to fall apart at the seams. Then Jason learns a shocking truth and realizes that he has to take matters into his own hands. Sometimes justice is a one-man show.

Feared

Feared PDF Author: Lisa Scottoline
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1250099617
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 397

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Book Description
In the new thriller from New York Times bestselling author Lisa Scottoline, Mary DiNunzio’s ruthless nemesis Nick Machiavelli is back...with a vengeance. When three men announce that they are suing the Rosato & DiNunzio law firm for reverse sex discrimination—claiming that they were not hired because they were men—Mary DiNunzio and Bennie Rosato are outraged. To make matters worse, their one male employee, John Foxman, intends to resign, claiming that there is some truth to this case. The plaintiffs’ lawyer is Nick Machiavelli, who has already lost to Mary once and is now back with a vengeance —determined not to not only win, but destroy the firm. It soon becomes clear that Machiavelli will do anything in his power to achieve his end...even after the case turns deadly. The stakes have never been higher for Mary and her associates as they try to keep Machiavelli at bay, solve a murder, and save the law firm they love...or they could lose everything they’ve worked for. Told with Scottoline's trademark gift for twists, turns, heart, and humanity, this latest thriller asks the question: Is it better to be loved, or feared... Feared, the sixth entry in the acclaimed Rosato & DiNunzio series, expertly explores what happens when we are tempted to give in to our own inner darkness. Praise for the Rosato & DiNunzio series: “Hit every mark... down to the last satisfying twist” —Kirkus Review on Feared "Fast paced, heart-tugging...readers will enjoy seeing how it all plays out." —Publishers Weekly on Exposed "The final curtain will find you cheering, and Scottoline will have earned every hurrah." —Kirkus (starred review) on Exposed "[The Rosato and DiNunzio stories] are always her best works and this newest is the best of the best in this series." —Huffington Post on Exposed